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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate that my husband does this

264 replies

Hevviie · 12/03/2023 21:52

My husband has a mad food habit (imo) that drives me crazy, but he thinks is absolutely fine. Basically whatever he eats he mashes all together with a fork until it's just a pile of mush. He insists that it's no different to eating the foods individually but to me it's just mad. Like I'll cook a whole roast with lovely crispy roast potatoes and he'll mash them to smithereens with everything else and it honestly makes my heart hurt. He thinks it's none of my business how he eats, maybe he's right. What do you think?

OP posts:
6daysaweek · 12/03/2023 21:54

it IS none of your business. and “it honestly makes my heart hurt” is ridiculously dramatic

RosieLeaLovesTea · 12/03/2023 21:55

Although a little strange that he does this as to me it reminds me of baby food all mashed together - I don’t think it would annoy me that much. Although I understand you may be annoyed if you have spent a long time and effort cooking a roast dinner.

MsVestibule · 12/03/2023 21:55

it honestly makes my heart hurt. Really??! I would find it a bit strange and perhaps irritating, but wouldn't take it personally. Presumably this isn't a new habit?

silverbubbles · 12/03/2023 21:55

That sounds revolting.

Casmama · 12/03/2023 21:56

I think it is your business if your husband eats like a toddler - I certainly would t ever eat out with him so I understand your feelings

NEmama · 12/03/2023 21:56

Oooh crispy roasties smushed into gravy 💦💦💦💦

Elsanore · 12/03/2023 21:57

I'd hate to be forced to witness that every mealtime. Does he do it in restaurants too? Do his parents do it?

RosieLeaLovesTea · 12/03/2023 21:57

Yes interesting point - what is he like he goes to a restaurant?

MoveOnTheCards · 12/03/2023 21:57

Gives me the ick. Toddler behaviour.

Rainpigeon · 12/03/2023 21:57

It would really annoy me too, you've gone to all the trouble to create a meal, textures and flavours and he mashes it up like a baby. I understand its his food and that's how he wants it but I would be annoyed all the same.

AnnaTortoiseshell · 12/03/2023 21:57

Has he always done this?

Thisisformathilda · 12/03/2023 21:58

All goes down the same way. I can think of worse thing that make my heart hurt than my OH eating a blended dinner.

Original poster
Hevviie · 12/03/2023 21:58

Ok I accept the charge of being overly dramatic. It defo is more like 'what's the point in me cooking when it's going to be instantly destroyed?'

OP posts:
ChocSaltyBalls · 12/03/2023 21:59

silverbubbles · 12/03/2023 21:55

That sounds revolting.

I agree, it is his business but it does sound disgusting. I couldn’t go out with a meal with someone with those table manners, I’d be too embarrassed

Annabananna1 · 12/03/2023 21:59

To be honest I think it is quite weird and would reduce the sex appeal. I just wouldn't find a man who did this attractive. The fancy-ing level would decrease spectacularly. So... in that sense it is your business.

Did he always do this? If he's always done it I don't think you can turn around and have a big issue with it. You knew what you signed up for.

determinedtomakethiswork · 12/03/2023 21:59

I would really struggle to eat in the same room as him. Has he always always done that?

GoodChat · 12/03/2023 22:00

That's grim. If he wants to eat like that on his own that's fine but I'd find it off-putting.

WhereAreTheChocButtons · 12/03/2023 22:00

Ex did this or into a slices of bread ( easily half load a meal!) not even folded bread literally like stuffed and rolled how a toddler would try to make a sandwich. As he put in he mouth hed be holding it so tightly because of the way he rolled it his fingers would go in his mouth too.
. Thankfully he never moved in. And the 2nd biggest reason hes EX

timeforchampagne · 12/03/2023 22:00

Yabu
not how I’d choose to eat but unless this is a new thing, and only linked to your cooking then clearly that just how they choose to eat their food

LemonJuiceFromConcentrate · 12/03/2023 22:02

Pfft at the minimisers on the thread. It would really piss me off if I was taking the time to make good meals, with vegetables cooked to the appropriate textures and so on I quite like cooking, but it's still domestic labour and DP was blending it into a mixed puree night after night.

And then to be told it makes no difference!

HappiestSleeping · 12/03/2023 22:02

Is it safe to presume he's always done this, and yet you went through the whole dating thing and got married without it bothering you sufficiently?

I get how you feel, but it strikes me as a bit late to be bothered about it now unless he's only just started doing it?

LemonJuiceFromConcentrate · 12/03/2023 22:02

^^ Accidental strikethrough when I just meant to use parenthetical dashes

Asummersday · 12/03/2023 22:02

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
Hevviie · 12/03/2023 22:03

No he doesn't do it in restaurants, just my food lol.....I mean I know it's not a divorcing matter or anything but I was just wondering what people think. I really don't remember him doing it when we first got together, defo a case of being 7 years in

OP posts:
LemonJuiceFromConcentrate · 12/03/2023 22:03

Hevviie · 12/03/2023 21:58

Ok I accept the charge of being overly dramatic. It defo is more like 'what's the point in me cooking when it's going to be instantly destroyed?'

You're absolutely not being unreasonable