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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you feel uncomfortable if your cleaner wore these?

321 replies

Phoebo · 10/03/2023 06:45

My cleaner often wears quite revealing leggings, I wouldn't care except my husband often works from home and she also cleans his office which requires bending etc. She's also very attractive. It makes me feel uncomfortable and inferior but I don't feel like I can say anything to her. I personally don't feel this is professional for anyone to be wearing to work, except perhaps if you work in a gym or similar. What do others think? Would you be ok with it?

OP posts:
gogohmm · 10/03/2023 07:11

I personally don't think the leggings that form around your bum are ever appropriate, whoever thought they were and invented them is weird. Normal leggings are fine.

carriedout · 10/03/2023 07:12

If your husband wants to look at someone else's arse he will find a time/place to do that anyway.

I think you need to stop blaming your cleaner for your own insecurities and your husband's (possibly imagined) lust. You are behaving like a Victorian- they used to blame the servant when the master of the house got them pregnant.

notacooldad · 10/03/2023 07:12

Of course your Dh has noticed her ass, you have! But so what.
This trend is everywhere at the moment.

Original poster
Phoebo · 10/03/2023 07:13

BlueHeelers · 10/03/2023 07:09

I personally don't feel this is professional for anyone to be wearing to work,

Weirdest use of “professional “ I’ve heard to cover just being judgmental.

Interesting, I remember someone showing a dress on here which was quite short which I thought was lovely, and most people said it wasn't appropriate for an office. That was what I meant by "professional".

OP posts:
namechangeforthisbleep · 10/03/2023 07:13

Lol

Totalwasteofpaper · 10/03/2023 07:13

My cleaner wears similar. It never occurred to me to care... they are comfortable for cleaning and not indecent in any way.

Its 100% a you problem.

Aftjbtibg · 10/03/2023 07:14

I’d probably be inwardly jealous that I don’t have a good enough bum for that but in the same way I am about people on the street in it.
Id expect my DH to be respectful of someone cleaning his office and not be looking at their bum when they bend over; yes notice it is normal but not focus on it

ThinWomansBrain · 10/03/2023 07:14

did you disable voting because you realised it would be 100% YABU?
If you have time to wander around monitoring what she's wearing, and whether or not it aroused your husband, maybe do your own cleaning.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 10/03/2023 07:15

Cleaning is quite a physical job. Makes sense to do it in more sports wear like leggings etc.

Are you suggesting that she should not wear these because it may distract your husband?

EyesOnThePies · 10/03/2023 07:15

I can’t imagine such a garment was made for comfort.

In the words of Jim Royle “I paid a quid for these pants and I’ve got 50 pence worth stuck up my arse”

Original poster
Phoebo · 10/03/2023 07:15

gogohmm · 10/03/2023 07:11

I personally don't think the leggings that form around your bum are ever appropriate, whoever thought they were and invented them is weird. Normal leggings are fine.

I wouldn't care with normal leggings, just these weird bum ones. Which I suppose makes me even more strange to care! 😳

OP posts:
Canyousewcushions · 10/03/2023 07:18

Yabu, I hoped we were getting past the time where women were judged like this on what they wear, and men are seen as some kind of uncontrollable beasts who are incapable of self restraint.

If your DH is a horrible perv then by all means ask her not to clean the office while he's working in it save the poor woman from being made uncomfortable while she's trying to her job.

If your DH isn't a horrible creep then leave her to wear what she's comfortable in.

PortiasBiscuit · 10/03/2023 07:18

Gawd, if only this was ALL I had to worry about… !

shouldhavetakenmorenotice · 10/03/2023 07:18

Agree OP.

If there's an actually seam down there can you imagine the chaffing? I'd be more concerned she stops coming because she's got blisters 🤣

There's no accounting for taste.

notthisagainforest · 10/03/2023 07:19

Good for her. No I wouldn't care what my cleaner wore even if my husband was there.

MirabelMax · 10/03/2023 07:19

I don’t like those weird up the bum leggings. I don’t really want to see people’s bums. I feel the same about thong bikinis.

They are what the young people wear these days those so I guess we just have to wait for this particular fashion to pass

Original poster
Phoebo · 10/03/2023 07:19

ThinWomansBrain · 10/03/2023 07:14

did you disable voting because you realised it would be 100% YABU?
If you have time to wander around monitoring what she's wearing, and whether or not it aroused your husband, maybe do your own cleaning.

Some of these comments 🤣 No, I'm new and didn't know how to (or didn't notice)

OP posts:
AnImaginaryCat · 10/03/2023 07:19

If this is all about your insecurity and not worry about the master of the house having his wicked way with the young maid, what do you want to happen?

They are perfectly standard leggings (thoughts on wedgey look aside) and leggings are acceptable wear for a cleaning job.

Your DH will probably already have spotted she's attractive and know she's young. Is because you either

  • think he'll think her more attractive than you
  • think you wouldn't look attractive in the leggings?
shouldhavetakenmorenotice · 10/03/2023 07:20

Is also be interested to see if the other posters would have a problem with these being worn in a casual office environment.

carriedout · 10/03/2023 07:21

Phoebo · 10/03/2023 07:13

Interesting, I remember someone showing a dress on here which was quite short which I thought was lovely, and most people said it wasn't appropriate for an office. That was what I meant by "professional".

Show quote history

But cleaning is not a job that has ever warranted a professional uniform. At our workplace they wear fleeces and rubber gloves.

Do you want your cleaner to wear a suit? Confused

SocksAndTheCity · 10/03/2023 07:21

They're completely normal sports leggings. The pair I'm wearing right now on the way to the gym have a centre seam too, probably because it's easier to do things like lunges.

Since cleaning is a physical job, I'd think they were a sensible choice for work, especially since there isn't trailing fabric to get in the way.

Blossomtoes · 10/03/2023 07:21

BlueHeelers · 10/03/2023 07:09

I personally don't feel this is professional for anyone to be wearing to work,

Weirdest use of “professional “ I’ve heard to cover just being judgmental.

Quite. And since when was cleaning an occupation requiring “professionalism”? Is your bloke an irresistible Greek god OP?

carriedout · 10/03/2023 07:22

MirabelMax · 10/03/2023 07:19

I don’t like those weird up the bum leggings. I don’t really want to see people’s bums. I feel the same about thong bikinis.

They are what the young people wear these days those so I guess we just have to wait for this particular fashion to pass

I would draw the line at my cleaner wearing a thong bikini Grin

Doingmybest12 · 10/03/2023 07:22

I thought you meant leggings that were completely see through or something . Sports leggings sound practical for cleaning. I am sure if she's attractive she would be in anything. But I do think some people are dishonest to say they wouldn't care at all. I personally don't want to see revealing or overly body hugging clothing on either sex. And people do make active choices about what they wear and take into account whether others will think about it. Otherwise fashion wouldn't exist. But having said that I think this issue is really yours in this instance as it makes complete sense to wear leggings for cleaning.

MuggleMe · 10/03/2023 07:23

Not related but your DH should leave his office when she's cleaning in there. No need to see her bend.

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