AIBU to ask for alternatives to toxic old MN

[FannyBawz]

I’ve been here 15 years and just find it all so nasty and toxic a lot of the time. The witty responses have gradually been replaced by snidey bitchiness much of the time, honestly it’s so depressing. People get jumped on all the time for asking for support.

Thats before we get to the way that womens rights are treated plus the whole sex forum fiasco.

and sorry I am fed up with having dildos waved at me every time I sign on.

Nobody seems to give a shit really at MNHQ and they have a like it or lump it mentality to valid concerns.

I know I don’t have to stay here and So does anybody have any recommendations for other forums? I see a new one called FemVox has been set up and it looks promising.

what else is out there?

@nokeetent I've been called a prude so many times the word isn't even insulting any more.

I see that stuff every day. Never mind what the OP has posted oh no just have a rip at a missing apostrophe or accuse them of drip feeding because they won't give up personal information.

It was all trivial stuff, really. Silly of me to let it upset me.

What worries me is that sometimes it isn't trivial. Like the woman who was suffering from depression and whose husband thought she should have a termination, but she didn't want to. I really hope she got proper advice and didn't go and get a termination just because some miserable people on mumsnet told her she was an awful mother. 😕

It's not silly of you at all 🤗The thoughtlessness is rampant. FB seems to be a little bit better because it's not so anonymous.

One little off the cuff snide comment can derail a day, a week or maybe a life.

I agree OP. I've been here 20 years and I've had some really great practical advice. DH got some compensation after being sacked, each of my sons have been saved from a nasty crisis by MN advice and I wouldn't have my Eufy without MN 😆 but I've been through some tough times lately and have come here for support. I know I haven't always dealt with it well, I've been very distressed and acted irrationally at times have been torn to shreds by some posters and when I thread turns like that there no bringing it back no matter how much other posters try to call for understanding.

I keep coming back with a practical issue but then I get sucked into other stuff. I know that I'm happier when I'm having a break from MN. FB doesn't cause me anywhere near as much pain.

I signed up a couple of days ago. Its still fairly green but there are quite a few threads now.

I'm also glad to know I'm not the only one with a whole folder of tattle tabs in my favourites waiting for the day I find my golden ticket.

I've been thinking about this thread over lunch and I can't pinpoint what it is that makes people turn on the vulnerable. There is nothing for them to gain and nobody is patting them on the back so wtf?

When I sense that someone may be hurting - no matter how irrational they may be acting in the moment - my instinct is to soften my approach.

Hugs @PinkVine

There really should be some way to ignore other posters. Every other social platform can do it and it works well because it protects the vulnerable.

Many moons ago when I was trying to conceive it was suggested here that I give it up because any kid I have after 40 is probably going to have issues. The BF zealots of old were terrifying in their venom.

Don't forget the men who need something to wank to.

You and I have made the same mistake with our expectations. Posting a thread on most social media is along similar lines as walking into a party full of people you dont know and expetcing them to treat you like a friend.

I think its peoples true character. In the real world, people are typically not as forthright but you can be sure that they're thinking it. On here, it's a place to just let rip. People can be pretty brutal. I'm not above it. I was outwardly kind to a young relative last week but I really wanted to say, fgs, get a grip of yourself, it's not that big a deal 🤷‍♀️

What are the odds that thyre wanking off to each other

My expectations were set by the phrase By Parents for Parents

Thank you that's much better said than I could. I'm not above the thoughts either but as a grown woman I do my best to not lash out at people.

How is that relevant to the observation I made?

Sorry that wasnt very clear lol

I mean "women with or without children and men looking for wank fodder" are welcome.

Some fetishes I can never understand. FEET? No thanks.

Feet are disgusting. So are ears gags

I'll give it a try. It's not twee is it? Like ahem cough netnums cough.

We're closing this thread as the last few pages are mostly just one poster talking to themselves about how terrible it all is here, and who repeatedly reregs in order to promote their own website.