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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbours sex life

225 replies

Granolaandyoghurt · 03/03/2023 23:01

AIBU not wanting to hear the neighbours having sex several times a week?! They are not overly loud but the construction of the houses means there's little soundproofing. I'm embarrassed that I can hear them but I'm just in bed trying to sleep, I'm sure they'd be embarrassed if they knew I could clearly hear them, but what can I do?! I can't exactly tell than can I?

OP posts:
Igenix4 · 04/03/2023 09:23

WinterMusings · 04/03/2023 09:18

I never understand these comments?!

Hiw/why do you see your neighbours wifi details?

I come into my house, wifi connects automatically & I just MN or whatever.I never see a list of neighbours wifis.

why are you?

@Fudgemaker why not try putting a TV/radio on loud on the adjoining wall everytime they start up?

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List of available networks

Namechange192727171 · 04/03/2023 09:23

I had this, it got ridiculous at one point so I banged on the wall and shouted for them to shut up.

It worked.

Emmamoo89 · 04/03/2023 09:26

I wouldn't give a shit. Buy earplugs

YukoandHiro · 04/03/2023 09:31

Why on Earth should you move your bedroom? Fair point.

And also, why on Earth should they stop shagging in their own home?

I get that it's annoying but that's the nature of terrace life. So it's either tell them (I agree, to embarrassing), turn up the radio really loud when it's happening so hopefully they get the message, ear plugs or move bedrooms if it bothers you that much?

Notellinganyone · 04/03/2023 09:37

Granolaandyoghurt · 03/03/2023 23:45

Why on earth should I?!!

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Because you live in a terraced house and people are entitled to go about their lives. Do you expect them to stop having sex?

Bestmum69420 · 04/03/2023 09:49

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

shaniquatate · 04/03/2023 09:51

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Devoutspoken · 04/03/2023 09:54

Given that it's possible to have an orgasm without screaming it is a bit selfish of them

creekingmillenial · 04/03/2023 09:59

I think you’re being a bit weird about this. We had thin walls and could hear our neighbours. So we moved our upstairs around so it was our study rather than bedroom. Poor sound insulation isn’t their fault. They have a right to have a sex in their own home.

maddy68 · 04/03/2023 09:59

Granolaandyoghurt · 03/03/2023 23:45

Why on earth should I?!!

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Because it's bothering you.!

There isn't a lot they can do if the walls are so thin. Can you move your bed to the other wall ?

What do you expect them to do ? They can't change the thickness of the walls they are having a perfectly normal relation

(You know they can hear you too!). Invest in sone war plugs

OheeOheeOh · 04/03/2023 10:34

I realise it must be annoying but short of telling them to stop having sex I'm not sure what difference sending notes will do? They sound like a young ish couple, I highly doubt they will be embarrassed into stopping having sex, in fact they might take it up a notch!

We live in a semi, our bed is on the joining wall (it's the only wall it can go on). We can hear coughing and sneezing very clearly so we know they can hear us having sex. I'm not embarassed, I'm happily married and will have sex in my bed if I want to. I think it's one of those things you accept if you live in a semi or terrace, you will hear other people going about their lives.

ChrisPPancake · 04/03/2023 10:52

Here's an idea: www.tiktok.com/@ghostflamewolf/video/6847696797780004102

RainbowBrightside · 04/03/2023 10:58

We just used to laugh at our neighbours whenever we heard ‘I’m cumming babe, I’m cumming babe’…in a really high pitched squeaky voice. That was from him not her 😆 So glad we live in a detached house now!

You could try playing ‘I just had sex’ by the Lonely Island really loudly on Alexa every time they finish? The lyrics are great.

pristinesurfacesGBTD · 04/03/2023 14:24

Eyerollcentral · 04/03/2023 01:52

It’s really not. The whole tone of your post was about trying to make the OP out to be a tiresome prude. What reasonable steps can the OP take? Believe it or not most people won’t go to their neighbour’s door and say can you keep it down when you are shagging? Everyone knows when they are being loud in bed. It’s incredibly rude to not take that in to account particularly when you live in terraced housing and you can hear people next door yourself.

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The tone of my post was irritation as the OP seems unwilling to take the steps someone else suggested to avoid noises she doesn't want to hear ie move the bed. OP is tiresome, yes. Prudish? I don't know or care about her prudishness and didn't mention it. You did though.

MyGhastIsFlabbered · 04/03/2023 19:23

OMG this happened to me...my neighbour approached my boyfriend and basically asked us to keep the noise down, but phrased it in the most toe-curlingly embarrassing way ever.

I was so mortified and could never relax having sex again. I was so glad to move out.

Namechangetobeanon · 04/03/2023 19:47

I am thankfully friends with my neighbour and we’ve both joked about hearing each others antics but at the same time we didn’t realise anyone could hear.

It made us both become aware of it and ultimately try and limit noise as much as possible.

Eyerollcentral · 04/03/2023 23:09

pristinesurfacesGBTD · 04/03/2023 14:24

The tone of my post was irritation as the OP seems unwilling to take the steps someone else suggested to avoid noises she doesn't want to hear ie move the bed. OP is tiresome, yes. Prudish? I don't know or care about her prudishness and didn't mention it. You did though.

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Why the f should the OP have to move her bed to facilitate the exhibitionists next door?

pristinesurfacesGBTD · 04/03/2023 23:14

Eyerollcentral · 04/03/2023 23:09

Why the f should the OP have to move her bed to facilitate the exhibitionists next door?

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She doesn't HAVE to do anything. It was a suggestion 🤣😂🤣😂 duoh

Eyerollcentral · 04/03/2023 23:19

pristinesurfacesGBTD · 04/03/2023 23:14

She doesn't HAVE to do anything. It was a suggestion 🤣😂🤣😂 duoh

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Right, pointless then. Thanks for clarifying!!!

pristinesurfacesGBTD · 04/03/2023 23:23

The entire post and thread is pointless. But so what? Everyone can pile on.

FoxInSocksSatOnBlocks · 04/03/2023 23:29

Eyerollcentral · 04/03/2023 23:09

Why the f should the OP have to move her bed to facilitate the exhibitionists next door?

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Enjoying sex doesn’t make you an exhibitionist 😂

kwetu · 04/03/2023 23:30

Soapnotshowergel · 03/03/2023 23:33

Round of applause when they finish?

Brilliant 😂

Eyerollcentral · 04/03/2023 23:36

FoxInSocksSatOnBlocks · 04/03/2023 23:29

Enjoying sex doesn’t make you an exhibitionist 😂

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Screaming through your neighbour’s wall does 😂

WinterMusings · 05/03/2023 00:09

Igenix4 · 04/03/2023 09:23

List of available networks

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Yes, I know you can go & look for them, but WHY are people routinely seeing them?

WinterMusings · 05/03/2023 00:12

WisherWood · 04/03/2023 08:41

I used to be able to hear my neighbours. In a way, I was quite grateful that I'd got the heads up that you could hear that much through the walls, as it made me a bit more careful when I got together with my DP.

I never said anything to them as they were pretty careful and it's obvious the walls are thin as you can hear people sneeze next door. I just put my wardrobe and chest of drawers against the party wall - nice load of clothing deadened the noise quite a bit.

Then the neighbours moved and everyone who's lived their since is either celibate or has the most vanilla sex going.

@WisherWood so you moved your wardrobe & chest of drawers everytine, to rate the type of sex they have🤔

🤣😂🤣😂