To have refused to get out of my car for the police in the middle of the night?

[AngeloMysterioso]

Was driving home from work at just after 2 a.m last night when I was pulled over by a pair of male coppers in a squad car after I swerved in the road to avoid a pothole.

I stopped, lowered my window a crack and then turned the engine off and made sure all the doors were locked. They both got out of the car and came over, asked about where I was going, where I’d been etc etc and then asked about the swerve- I explained about the pothole, and that I didn’t consider the move to have been dangerous as there were no other vehicles or anywhere near me (they had been some distance in front of me at the time and on the other side of the road but there was absolutely no chance of a collision) and no pedestrians anywhere around.
Then they asked if I would get out of the car and take a breathalyser test. I refused- I said I’d happily drive to the police station (maybe a mile- mile and a half away) and take a breathalyser there, but that I didn’t feel safe getting out of my car and being alone with two massive blokes in the middle of the night with no other people around, and them being in a uniform didn’t change that for me.

They asked a few more questions about my work, if they needed to would anyone be able to verify that I’d been working, gave me a lecture about driving safely and in the end let me go home with no further action taken - but I’ve just had a phonecall from another police officer basically telling me off for not just doing as I was told.

Was I BU?

As said before, we know they are not all dodgy. But we don't know WHICH ones are dodgy. And on an unlit country road alone, it's perfectly reasonable to think about her safety as her top priority. And the police need to listen to these genuine concerns (without eye rolling) and acknowledge there has been fundamental damage done to their relationship with the public, especially women.

@Rosscameasdoody she didn't refuse to do a breath test. She said she wasn't getting out of her car. Different.

@CarrieBsWardrobe you don't believe it - don't be so naive. Of course it happens. The power to have control over people, rather than to serve and protect, is what attracts some individuals to the police and they find their tribe of like minded comrades within pretty quickly and look after each other.

There are obviously many good police officers working for the good, but it's ridiculous not to acknowledge the fact some with abusive traits join for the power trip.

‘Theres a clear agenda here from some posters to keep stirring anti police rhetoric.’

the police are, time and time again, being accused of institutional racism and misogyny. It’s not anti police to point this out, it’s not anti police for women and people of colour to be wary of police officers and the institutions they represent.
And nothing will change until the police change - and people like you getting defensive over facts helps no one

86% of posters don’t think OP was unreasonable to be too scared to get out of her car when police told her to.
what does that say about the perception of our police right now?

It says absolutely nothing about the public perception of the police.

Each MN thread is representative only of the small subset of posters who choose to post on certain threads and influenced by MN culture. It is in no way an accurate representation of how people think, act or behave in RL.

3330 people have voted, not that small.

Indeed a larger sample size than IOPC. Some police think tank somewhere seems to hate the women of MN.

Do you think we should dismiss IOPC's reports? @Survey99 probably does.
www.policeconduct.gov.uk/research-and-learning/statistics/public-confidence-and-engagement

Like it or not, there is significant public distrust towards the police.

Any sensible person regardless of gender should have a degree of caution to a situation of being stopped at night with no other witnesses in sight, regardless of whether the people doing the stopping are in uniform. In the circumstance OP describes I would do exactly as she did, and rather than the officers getting defensive they should have the capacity to reflect on why there is distrust and work with the people who are displaying this mistrust to regain it.

Well, you're not wrong in that it's probably weighted heavily towards women.

I've changed my mind.

Had an argument with my DH so now I'm with all police are misogynistics and terrible brigade.

Bloody heck, what was the argument about?

@ChunkaMunkaBoomBoom ive taught my kids the same. If lost/threatened, they are safer looking for another mum who has children WITH HER than asking a man or police.

Ah ok so now we just allow suspected drunk drivers to keep driving? And if she crashed into a car full of people whilst driving to that brightly lit place and killed them? What then? You would probably blame the police!

@OMG12 what is the police policy for stopping lone women?
The policy that keeps women, police and the public safe?
Do they have one?
If not, why not?

As someone from south yorkshire, I have zero trust in my local force.

Orgreave, Hillsborough, Rotherham, these were mass cover ups and corruption.

Many officers in Rotherham have never been properly held to account for what happened.

I'm not talking about defending the police, they need to do a hell of lot better.

South Yorkshire was also my local force. I also have little trust in the police...

what is the likelihood of a pair of policemen committing crimes together?

Perhaps higher than we would like to think. Both Couzens and Carrick were known as offenders by their colleagues who've them "joking" nicknames like "The Rapist".

It doesn't exactly fill you with confidence, does it?

A lone woman who presents as absolutely stone-cold sober and who has a perfectly reasonable explaination for moving across the road in a safe way should be well within her rights to refuse to leave her car when asked to do so by two men when there are no witnesses present in order to keep herself safe.

If the driver is displaying actual indications they've been drinking then that is an arrestable offense.

This, I hope, should be blindingly obvious.

No - that smells of French lawyers.

That is sound advice. Very few women who are out with their own kids are in the market for nicking anyone else's.

It may be obvious to you, but it isn't the law of England and Wales (don't know about Scotland).

The police need reasonable suspicion of driving under the influence, which the OP gave them by swerving (she had a good reason to swerve, but they couldn't see that). That being the case, they could lawfully require her to take a breath-test, and they could arrest her if she refused.

It's naive to think that the police can just tell if someone is drunk. Habitual drinkers, in particular, can present as normal even when way over the limit. A&E in the UK doesn't test for alcohol unless there is a medical reason to do so, but I used to work for the emergency services in Australia, where A&E is required by law to take blood samples for alcohol testing from anyone involved in a road accident. You would be amazed how many apparently totally sober people are pissed.

How am I supposed to know? I don’t work for the police and I’ve never asked them that question. How utterly bizarre!!!!

And probably even fewer policemen on duty🤦‍♀️

No actually, this is why there are breathalysers🤦‍♀️