Set his cheating message as his screen saver

[Tothemoonandbackx]

So my lying, cheating.....now (not that he knows it yet) EX is snoring away beside me. We have the same make and model of phone, and I'd plugged mine in earlier to charge, but didn't realise he'd taken mine out to charge his up while I was in the shower. A notification popped up, on what I thought was my phone plugged in, I went to read the message and saw it was from another women, talking about how amazing their kiss was, completely baffled, I soon realised it was his phone. Turns out not only have they shared this amazing kiss, but they've also spent nights together while he's been away at work. To say I'm heartbroken is an understatement, anger has over ridden me but I want to play it cool before I dump his sorry, pathetic lying cheating fucking ass!!!! I've set his screen saver to the last message she sent, so there's no way he can deny it, I'm waiting for him to eventually see it in the morning, am I crazy, or do I wake him up and kick him out now?????

Sending you a great big hug OP. 🫂

I'd never have a go at her unless it was clear she knew he (used to) have a partner,

She has no loyalty to you. Even if she knew this isn’t on her at all and she isn’t to blame.

If he hasn't gone by the time I get there on my break, I'll just start packing his things, he works away quite a bit so doesn't really have loads here, I could most likely get in done in under an hour if I rush it.

OP, this is how it’s done 👏

Just think of him as the tool you’ve used to finetune your bullshit meter so you can filter out the dickwads in the future before they become fullblown cocklodgers.

And if, as you suspect, the OW is aware that you exist…then quite frankly, karma will take care of her as he’ll do exactly the same to her when the shine wears off.

Have a cry later when the anger and adrenaline wears off, maybe get a close friend round to talk it through and then move on. He’s not worth your headspace.

PS: Can we be friends, because you’re awesome? 😘

What does you want him to message you for? Why haven't you blocked him? You shouldn't want to hear from it at all.

Of course he doesn't 'care'. If he really cared, he wouldn't have been balls deep in another woman.

You have been amazingly strong and well composed. Don't fuck it up by letting him weedle his way back in with pathetic excuses.

God I can only hope I'd manage to be as dignified and civilised as you, what an inspiration you are.

Wishing you lots of happiness and peace in whatever happens next for you op.

Change the locks.
Change your mobile number if you don’t want him crawling back into your bed.

I'm so sorry this has happened. But reading your messages, you've handled this with grace and strength.

I hope he's cleared our when you get back home.

good for you op

💪

OP, you are actual my hero. The sheer bravery, class and cool head you have is something I could never possess. I’m in awe. You, my dear are a legend and you know your worth. Remember that in the days and weeks to come when you question it ❤️

OP you’re certainly stringing this out as long as possible.

How are you feeling OP? Presumably you loved this man and this must’ve come as a shock. Please look after yourself and lean on whatever support you have around you.

There is no text book way to handle this and she has done the right thing. If she tried to sling him out last night she would have left herself very vulnerable as she wouldn’t know how he would react. This way she can be out of the house while he gets himself together and gets out.

My suggestion OP is that after work you get someone to come home with you in case he is still there and wants to get into something.

Well done!
Class.

Don't hope for anything, don't look out for messages, don't wonder, or speculate.

The classic excuses, fake apologies, fake promises, poor me, it was all your fault, you're nothing without me, you're crazy sequence may kick off.

Keep classy and calm, protect yourself - block him everywhere, warn anyone you trust that he may try to manipulate them into helping him get to you.

Play I Will Survive at top volume.

If you trust your line manager, may be wise to let them know so they understand if you ever need support.

All best. 🤗

total resilience OP! Living legend!

Id deffo tell her.... She may know about you... Or she may be another victim of his lies.

Id just send a couple of lines... Of you don't know the man you're sleeping with was in an x year r/s with me (ending this morning) . Just so you know and you don't want to get involved with a cheat.

Way to go OP! Stay calm and get the cheating shit out of your life today.

Please please be kind. Now is not the time to give her a hard time. She has enough to deal with right and is doing it fantastically which bodes well for the future.

Caroline Flack tried that.

Wouldn't recommend it.

What 🙄?! Ffs

OP you don’t need me to say this, but take no notice of this ‘advice’, as what you’ve done is totally admirable and it’s how YOU wanted to do it.

You’ve really done yourself proud here, under very emotive circumstances 👍🏼☺️⭐️

Her approach is much more sensible than waking a sleeping man and having a row in the middle of the night.

You'd wish things could be so black and white as some previous posters have said, but everyone doea handle their own situations differently. I'm certainly not trying to stretch it all out for as long as possible, or create drama for myself. Ive been cheated on and trying to handle it the best way I can.

OP, there are some right arseholes on here today who seem to delight in kicking women when they’re down.
You are doing brilliantly. Stay strong and keep your head up x