The stupid takeaway.

[Gworlie]

My OH has been away for a week and came back today. He turned up this evening with a Chinese takeaway for himself. Didn't even say he was getting one or asked if I wanted one. I've worked all week and done all childcare, which is fine, but when I said "well that's a bit shitty, I'm knackered and hungry too" his response was "well cook something then". I'm raging but he's acting like I'm being crazy.

I cannot resolve it . Nor can anyone else. At some point they will need to speak to each other.
What the OP wanted people to say in response I have no idea.

Not read this afternoon's updates yet but I saw this post and wanted to agree & say THIS ⬆️!!

Something has definitely happened whilst he was away

@Guis Is this your first time on MN?!?! OP, like every other, posted for this thing called support. Also to see if anyone else had any ideas what an innocent explanation could be for his behaviour. Perfectly reasonable

People did post and offer their thoughts. And asked questions. She wasn't ignored.

And she engaged with those people.

Then we have you going on about ‘real stress’ in Ukraine, complaining about formulaic MN posts and saying things like What the OP wanted people to say in response I have no idea.

You realise that nobody was making you say anything? If you had no idea what to say, you weren’t required to comment. You could have just left it to those of us who do/did know what to say, whilst you go about more important business, pertaining to world peace.

I said I didn't know what the OP wanted people to say.
I did know what I wanted to say and said it.

Why are you still here, being unhelpful and condescending about the ‘sense of proportion’ and formulaic posts as opposed to all the far more important things to which you could turn your lofty attentions?

Why are you persisting ? I haven't said anything I felt to be purposefully unhelpful. Nor have I been condescending .
I am sorry if my posts have pressed some sort of button for you. Please can you stop. It is becoming personal from you to me.

What the OP wanted people to say in response I have no idea.

This. Unhelpful.

She wanted opinions and she got lots of responses. That's the whole point of a thread.

Why are you persisting?

I am answering those who persist. Not the other way around. I have said to the other poster which you will have seen to stop. So please do. You disagree. Fine. Don't keep hounding me about it. Please.

A sense of proportion that was all

oh ffs. I hate this shit, is no one allowed to have any problems because something bigger is always going on in the world?

So no one can be upset about anything, complain that they’ve runs out of milk, be stressed about putting food on the table, distressed over an argument with a partner or sad their dog dies because they should get a sense of proportion!?

This stupid idea of there’s always someone worse off then you is unhelpful and condescending.

Something has definitely happened whilst he was away

That was my first thought too. It would certainly explain his sudden change in attitude.

Has he apologised yet? Did you seriously cook for him yesterday? Argh. I'm still so annoyed in your behalf.

*on

I’d be beyond livid!! The cheek of it he should be asking you what take out YOU want after being on ya own with the kiddos all week.

I hope you make him lasagne with dog food

I'd show him the door it might only be a take away now but whats it going to be in 3 months

I'm very invested in this now and need to know how things are now @Gworlie ?
Did you have the chinese at your sisters? Did he realise you were making a stand?

I'd be sleeping in separate rooms.

I think things like this show a real lack of care for you. Quite sad really. It's just mean.

First of all you call him OH rather than DP which technically is a red flag, I voted YABU because basically I feel he doesn't deserve this lambasting. He has been away for a week - you knew he would be coming home yet no dinner ready? He would have known this and, therefore quite rightly, provided his own food - what is wrong with that ? If you are that unhappy, maybe it is time to address that rather than slag him off on this forum.

He is a gaslighting you big time!

It’s bad enough he came home with one with no consideration to the rest of the family, but then to give that response is unforgivable! 😵

In her most recent messages yesterday morning, the OP explains that she had told him she would be preparing dinner for all of them and had asked him what he wanted to eat that evening. She could hardly have prepared, cooked and eaten it between 6.00pm, when she stopped working, and 6.30pm when he came home, especially when she had told him she'd be cooking.