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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I found this dress totally unacceptable

286 replies

Whatwouldyado · 22/02/2023 21:07

Would you wear this out to a restaurant? Wearing nothing underneath but nipple covers and thong?

just to be clear…this is an open all day brunch/lunch then tapas burgers kinda place. family friendly, kids menu crayons ect. Not an evening or drinks venue.

I was completely taken a back as to why anyone would think it’s appropriate to wear that to a kid friendly restaurant

couldn’t find a link to the actual dress but it’s very similar to this Kylie Jenner one.

AIBU here?!

detail missing incase it’s outing!

I found this dress totally unacceptable
OP posts:
Makilda · 23/02/2023 00:04

limitedperiodonly · 22/02/2023 23:40

@Makilda ageist now sexist. You keep using those words I do not think they mean what you think they mean.

Wear what you want. Don't care about what other people wear. It's a restaurant not a church.

I said sexist, I meant ageist. I'm tired.

Please explain why you say I don't understand what ageism means.

BeaverLeader · 23/02/2023 00:04

Link fail, the pantasaurus song!

Mamanyt · 23/02/2023 00:11

theycallmestacie · 22/02/2023 21:16

Don't look then. You don't have to be cool - I'm certainly not.

Show quote history

I think the real issue was that this is a family-friendly place. Sometimes, you don't have enough hands to cover your kid's eyes. "Family friendly" should not include "free sex education for all ages." I know I'm old, and therefore considered way behind times, but in my youth, I wore my share of "see-through." I wore it out in the evenings, not to my local café for lunch.

Busybutbored · 23/02/2023 00:13

No, it's a bit much. But ... you were at a restaurant, so maybe it's your kids that shouldn't have been there? This is the problem when you want to take kids to adult settings and then adults have to adjust their behaviour because kids are around

Mummyoflittledragon · 23/02/2023 00:15

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 22/02/2023 23:44

As MN is completely fair and doesn't have any double standards, I'm so glad that we've established that adults can wear whatever they like; if you don't like it, you shouldn't be looking; and children need to be told that, if an adult wears something that most people would say is highly inappropriate, they need to shush and accept that the person has an absolute right to wear whatever they want without criticism or comment.

I'll pop over to Essex in the morning and apologise profusely on behalf of all of MN to the old man who stands outside schools dressed in a girl's school uniform, and admit to him that, no, WE were the ones in the wrong and not him.

Agreed. This outfit is not ok just because it’s worn by a natal female.

Emptycrackedcup · 23/02/2023 00:17

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 22/02/2023 23:44

As MN is completely fair and doesn't have any double standards, I'm so glad that we've established that adults can wear whatever they like; if you don't like it, you shouldn't be looking; and children need to be told that, if an adult wears something that most people would say is highly inappropriate, they need to shush and accept that the person has an absolute right to wear whatever they want without criticism or comment.

I'll pop over to Essex in the morning and apologise profusely on behalf of all of MN to the old man who stands outside schools dressed in a girl's school uniform, and admit to him that, no, WE were the ones in the wrong and not him.

Huh?? How did you come to that conclusion. You sound unhinged

Makilda · 23/02/2023 00:17

Busybutbored · 23/02/2023 00:13

No, it's a bit much. But ... you were at a restaurant, so maybe it's your kids that shouldn't have been there? This is the problem when you want to take kids to adult settings and then adults have to adjust their behaviour because kids are around

Restaurants are adult settings?

Children shouldn't go to restaurants?

Seriously?

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/02/2023 00:18

No, it's a bit much. But ... you were at a restaurant, so maybe it's your kids that shouldn't have been there? This is the problem when you want to take kids to adult settings and then adults have to adjust their behaviour because kids are around

Eh? Loads of restaurants are specifically designed (and advertised) to be family-friendly - many have kids' menus, crayons and colouring sheets and offer the use of high chairs. McDonalds calls itself a restaurant, for goodness' sake!

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/02/2023 00:19

Huh?? How did you come to that conclusion. You sound unhinged

How? The only difference is that, presumably, at least the old man's skirt fully covered his genital area.

15feb · 23/02/2023 00:23

I wouldn't wear it but let's say I was and I was hungry, I wouldn't be like "oh no I can't go into Nando's because my fashion isn't family friendly, think of the poor children" 🤣

It's not like it's just a low effort bikini as you're coming home from the beach, it's at least arguably fashion / an actual outfit in some sense even if awful

15feb · 23/02/2023 00:25

After all it's a kid/family FRIENDLY restaurant which is basically all/most restaurants. Not an actual kid's restaurant meant primarily for children.

Viviennemary · 23/02/2023 00:29

No I wouldn't because its not the type of thing I wear. But if someone else wore it then it wouldn't bother me in the least. Why would it.

NatashaDancing · 23/02/2023 00:35

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/02/2023 00:19

Huh?? How did you come to that conclusion. You sound unhinged

How? The only difference is that, presumably, at least the old man's skirt fully covered his genital area.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll, you don't sound unhinged. Can't say the same for some others.

Emptycrackedcup · 23/02/2023 00:35

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/02/2023 00:19

Huh?? How did you come to that conclusion. You sound unhinged

How? The only difference is that, presumably, at least the old man's skirt fully covered his genital area.

Outside a school? Come on. So not the same 🤤

Westpoint · 23/02/2023 00:37

But.......

would they wear it in Wigan?? 🤔

Busybutbored · 23/02/2023 00:39

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/02/2023 00:18

No, it's a bit much. But ... you were at a restaurant, so maybe it's your kids that shouldn't have been there? This is the problem when you want to take kids to adult settings and then adults have to adjust their behaviour because kids are around

Eh? Loads of restaurants are specifically designed (and advertised) to be family-friendly - many have kids' menus, crayons and colouring sheets and offer the use of high chairs. McDonalds calls itself a restaurant, for goodness' sake!

Sure if it's a restaurant specifically targeting kids ok, it is a bit much (although still its a free country). But not of its just a restaurant where someone happens to take their kids. There is a big difference.

Busybutbored · 23/02/2023 00:42

15feb · 23/02/2023 00:23

I wouldn't wear it but let's say I was and I was hungry, I wouldn't be like "oh no I can't go into Nando's because my fashion isn't family friendly, think of the poor children" 🤣

It's not like it's just a low effort bikini as you're coming home from the beach, it's at least arguably fashion / an actual outfit in some sense even if awful

This exactly. The dress itself is terrible, but being offended because of the children is really a bit much! 😆

ShandaLear · 23/02/2023 00:42

FFS, can we not just let people wear what they want to wear? It’s not to your taste, but she’s doing anything illegal.

Makilda · 23/02/2023 00:49

Busybutbored · 23/02/2023 00:39

Sure if it's a restaurant specifically targeting kids ok, it is a bit much (although still its a free country). But not of its just a restaurant where someone happens to take their kids. There is a big difference.

Show quote history

I don't get what the big difference is. Children eat in restaurants every day. It's really normal for families to eat in restaurants.

Restaurants aren't adult only spaces. I don't see why this is relevant.

JaneJeffer · 23/02/2023 00:49

Westpoint · 23/02/2023 00:37

But.......

would they wear it in Wigan?? 🤔

Grin
thefamous5 · 23/02/2023 00:49

It's a dress.

I'd look, probably be open mouthed in jealousy but couldn't get offended.

It's a body.

WickedStepmomNOT · 23/02/2023 00:56

Puffalicious · 22/02/2023 21:13

Seriously? Policing women? I'm all for women doing what they want BUT nipple covers and thong during the day in a restaurant with children and families? Totally inappropriate. Why sexualise everything all the time? And I'd say exactly the same if it was a man/ non-binary person. I don't want to see your arse/ chest over my lasagne and sticky toffee pudding.

Do what the hell you like in a bar/ club/ night-time.

I'm not cool enough to think it's okay.

Show quote history

I'm with @Puffalicious on this one. Inappropriate for the venue and time.

Busybutbored · 23/02/2023 00:56

Makilda · 23/02/2023 00:49

I don't get what the big difference is. Children eat in restaurants every day. It's really normal for families to eat in restaurants.

Restaurants aren't adult only spaces. I don't see why this is relevant.

Show quote history

We probably disagree on that point then, to me I'm not keen on children going to 'proper' restaurants in the first place, so to see OP complain about what someone is wearing (because of the children) is ridiculous to me.
In saying that, I do feel this dress would probably be ok in a McDonalds if that's where a couple were going on a date, she'd probably fit right in, it's not exactly what I'd call a 'classy' outfit 🤣

Startwithamimosa · 23/02/2023 00:59

At least she was wearing nipple covers 🤭😳🙈 🤣

LuluLehman · 23/02/2023 01:10

If she looks like the model in the picture then I see nothing wrong with it. It's a beautiful dress. Are you a bit older OP? I think older people (like me) forget what it was like to be young. We wore risqué clothes too and thought nothing of it. I remember wearing the tiniest of tiny tops and a really short skirt to parties. Nowadays I tut-tut at young people who go out wearing next to nothing with no coat, on a cold winter's day. And then I remember that I used to do exactly the same. And I don't remember feeling cold either.