Tedious performative under eaters

[SlimPig]

The thread about the PIL's measly portions reminded me of this, and how iritating it is. I remember once at work they bought us all fish and chips on one friday afternoon. When it arrived the two other women started their bs as soon as they were handed their box - oohh the weight of that! I'll never eat all that! Hadn't even opened it and looked at it yet.

Then, once opened, both of them, oh my god, I'll never eat all that (measly takeaway cardboard box portion, not a massive, in paper, large portion) ooh dear, we won't need dinner, or breakfast tomorrow now will we! Don't think I can eat my peas too, I'm so stuffed. I'm going to need to go for two runs tomorrow now! On and on, through the whole meal.

I was starving and had to make a conscious effort to eat it slowly because they were fucking about and pushing it round the box and I didn't want to look a pig, I'm a fast eater anyway, but that meal was just so god awful! In the end I just ate it at my normal speed.

Why? Why do people do this? Why can't they just eat their food normally? Why does everything have to be justified and offset? Just strikes me as so sad that they couldn't just eat their food without a whole performance (infront of all the men in the office, only 3 women there, me and them) of how birdlike they normally eat 😥

Ditto, I had fish & chips t'other day since seeing this thread & relished it.
My death row dinner fo' sho'.

That's the Dolly Parton diet. Eat everything you normally would, but leave half of it. Apparently that's how Dolly lost so much weight after getting fat and suicidal in the late 1980s.

I adore Dolly Parton but she hasn't stayed slim through diet and exercise alone.

👏

Just realised that I’ve had a real live thread experience today. Went for a pub lunch with PILs and FIL and I both had the fish and chips. MIL commented at least 3 times about how massive our fish were. I mean they weren’t stingy, but it was the usual sort of thing you’d expect in a decent pub when you’re paying £16 for it. FIL and I ate the lot happily and she commented again after we’d finished. It is rude, at the very least thoughtless, when you think about it.

I wouldn’t mind it from someone I’m very close to though. If my own mum said ‘gosh I don’t know where you’ve put that east’ I wouldn’t mind because I know she doesn’t mean anything by it.

It is rude, at the very least thoughtless, when you think about it.

It's very rude. Anything that interferes with people's enjoyment of a meal is bad table manners and that includes comments designed to make them feel self-conscious or ashamed about how much they're eating.

I'm still marvelling at the woman who, when the waiter sets the meal down, complains to him in front of everyone to express her displeasure at everyone's portion sizes. How does someone like that ever get invited to dinner twice?

Fuck knows, you can feel the judgement from here. The comments about the friends' huge portions are 😲

Eat with the men and tuck in.

They're making eating a performance and you need to distance yourself from this nonsense and have a good laugh about it.

There is such a thing as toxic femininity

Between this and the what's your order thrwd, I've been craving f&c for days 🤤

It's a mental illness

I just eat my food the way I want I love food and eating so just get on with it

Although i dont get 'I want a small portion but will eat off your plate instead'

So op really the issue is you if you change your eating habit to suit others

This is sheer pedantry and foot-stamping. “I haven’t got a small appetite and I don’t want small portions - everyone else eats too much and serves too much! I’m right and they’re all wrong!!!”

Seriously, even if you’ve somehow convinced yourself that you’re the only
person who eats a normal portion and everyone else is just greedy, why can’t you ask for a small portion? Their idea of a normal portion is your idea of big, so surely you can comprehend that their idea of small might correspond to your normal?

Seeing as how the average person is in the upper end of the overweight category, it actually stands to reason that most people eat quite a lot too much. Anyone who is a healthy weight and not very athletic, can, with good reason, assume they have a pretty normal appetite. And in the vast majority of restaurants, portion sizes are aimed at men rather than women, so any woman who isn't extremely athletic can assume with a great deal of surety, that portions are too big for them.

Not the point of the thread but I'm amazed that there are people who will break a biscuit or whatever in half slightly weird but ok but then PUT THE OTHER BIT BACK IN THE SHARED BOX!
That is a really mingin thing to do.

Ooh can you post a link to the what's your order thread? I love food chat.

Not the point of the thread but I'm amazed that there are people who will break a biscuit or whatever in half slightly weird but ok* but then PUT THE OTHER BIT BACK IN THE SHARED BOX!
That is a really mingin thing to do.*

I used to work in an office where a big pile of toast was made every morning. One person would eat half of her slice then leave the soggy half eaten half on top of the fresh toast, until she was ready to finish it. I don't eat breakfast so never participated, and I was especially grateful after seeing her repeatedly do that.

It is rude, at the very least thoughtless, when you think about it.

I think you should fight fire with fire and next time say “Gosh MiL, anyone would think you have an eating disorder with how much you bang on about portion sizes and what other people eat!” followed by a dead stare and let the uncomfortable silence hang in the air.

Jesus christ.

I'd have had to yeet that shit right off the top and across the fucking room, that is just disgusting.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/4749561-chippy-tea-whats-your-order

So fuck if a restaurant portion is "too big" for the average woman?
It's meant to be a treat.

That’s actually a really cruel thing to do to someone that likely has an eating (mental health) disorder.

If someone is saying things like that, chances are they are suffering a lot internally. People lucky enough to not be should just ignore it and enjoy their food.

Thats the point, you can't, because they are going on and on incessantly.

I think a lot of people have disordered eating, but it’s seen as socially acceptable.

Well even if that is true, it doesn’t change the fact that @Gwenhwyfar is banging her fists on the table because she wants her version of a normal portion, but doesn’t think she should have to ask for it because everyone else is wrong.

Mil makes a big song and dance about how much my teen girls eat 🙄. They really dont eat huge amounts and are both slim but when we sat down to a pub Sunday lunch she did her passive aggressive laugh and lots of “goodness are you going to eat all that I can’t believe it” etc on and in.

She is utterly tone deaf generally (if I’m being generous she is from a different country and has form for being foot in mouth clueless). But this was an epic fail. She tried it again at Christmas unfortunately for her mine are older now and dd2 actually asked “are you trying to food shame me?”. I should have ticked her off but mil bloody asked for that.