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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be disappointed at poor response re street party

494 replies

Geminijust · 21/02/2023 13:58

Smallish, quiet street, approx 45 houses, generally pretty friendly. Neighbour & I thought it might be nice to throw a party for the coronation. Council encouraging it by offering road closures & free insurance.

Sent out a note with a return slip asking people to say if they would interested, if they would be willing to help and inviting comments & suggestions. Gave them 2 weeks to respond. Deadline has passed and we have 17 responses, all positive, but that's less than half the street! AIBU to think it's really disappointing and actually rather rude :-(

Think we're going to send text to those that bothered to respond thanking them but, as we don't have a majority, informing them we will not be proceeding.

😐

OP posts:
Hopingforno2in2023 · 21/02/2023 13:59

I thought you were going to say you only had one or two responses! 17 households sounds plenty to me as presumably more than one person in most of the households.

Yesthatismychildsigh · 21/02/2023 14:00

You. Asked for them to respond if interested. How is not responding rude?

Fluteytooting · 21/02/2023 14:00

I thought you were going to see that you’d only had 1 or 2 responses. 17 is brilliant and I’d be going ahead if I was you.

Chasingsquirrels · 21/02/2023 14:00

Many many people are not at all interested in the coronation, why would they respond?

Branleuse · 21/02/2023 14:00

Id say thats a decent response. Plenty of people are probably not bothered either way. Why would you not, if you and nearly half the street want to?

Dallimore · 21/02/2023 14:01

17 is loads! I can't think of anything worse and would hate to do this but would have no problem with neighbours doing it. If they don't want to it's up to them, 17 other households is more than enough

PatriciaHolm · 21/02/2023 14:01

AIBU to think it's really disappointing and actually rather rude :-(

I suspect what the others have to say would be ruder than not replying, so they didn't ;-)

cestlavielife · 21/02/2023 14:01

17 is plenty.
More might join in once you make plans

Bobbybobbins · 21/02/2023 14:01

I think 17 is excellent. A lot of people might be going away.

Hadjab · 21/02/2023 14:02

This may come as a shock, but a lot of people actually don’t give a toss about the Royal Family, and aren’t interested in street parties. Yes, it would have been nice for them to respond, but it’s probably not made their everyday to-do list.

Chickychoccyegg · 21/02/2023 14:02

17 houses is loads of replies, honestly, I'd be going ahead if I had thst amount.

MamaCanYouBuyMeABanana · 21/02/2023 14:02

It's not rude, not everyone cares about the royal family, and not everyone wants to socialise or get too friendly with their neighbours.

17 is plenty for a street/garden party so I'm not sure why you wouldn't go ahead with those people.

LemonJuiceFromConcentrate · 21/02/2023 14:02

This kind of thing is way down most people’s list of priorities.

I wouldn’t regard it as particularly rude for someone to forget about, or even ignore, an unsolicited note through the door about something they have no interest in.

Boringcookingquestion · 21/02/2023 14:02

I think 17 responses is really good and enough for a nice party (presuming the majority of them don’t live alone, this could be quite a lot of people once partners and children are accounted for!). I’d go ahead, I’m sure you’ll have a lovely time.

I don’t think it’s rude for people to choose not to get involved though. You don’t know what they have going on in their lives and it’s ok to opt out of social events if they’re not your thing 🤷‍♀️

Danneigh · 21/02/2023 14:03

17 houses, prob min 2 people per house likely more! Are you mad?

IsItBedtimeYetNope · 21/02/2023 14:03

With the best will in the world, you're being unreasonable. You've had a really good response and if you were hoping for 100% response rate then you're never going to get anything done. Just plan the party and see who turns up. If you're that desperate for validation you could go door-to-door and talk to the other houses.

cocksstrideintheevening · 21/02/2023 14:03

You've had 17 responses, prepared to commit their time in May or whenever it is in February. Pretty good going. My neighbours are all pleasant but I have no wish to have a party with them.

Courtorder · 21/02/2023 14:04

You are being incredibly unreasonable. Bloody hell.

Many people don’t care about the coronation or are actively anti-monarchy. Those people obviously wouldn’t attend your party. Many people who do care about the coronation would rather go to London to see it rather than hang out on their own street.

Of the people inbetween, those who care enough to celebrate but not enough to go to London, there are a million reasons why one might not go to your party:

  • a wedding
  • a birthday
  • a holiday
  • a different celebration of the coronation
  • a family event
  • work
  • etc.

Getting over 1/3 of people on your street to commit to a street party is a very high turnout. You seem very self-absorbed to not think other people have very valid reasons to not want or not be able to attend.

Plumbear2 · 21/02/2023 14:04

That's actually a good response. The others probably don't know what they are doing that weekend. For me if it's not a train strike I would be visiting family else where, if not we would be doing something as a family. No

Fairylightsandstuff · 21/02/2023 14:05

We had a street party when it was the jubilee and I didn’t reply, i forgot, but I did say I would be there. A lot of people forgot to send the slips back but on the day there was quite a few there, I would go ahead with 17 households attending.

i dont give a toss about the royal family but any excuse for a knees up 😂

Comefromaway · 21/02/2023 14:05

17 responses is a LOT.

I don't yet know what I'm doing that weekend but ds plays in a band and he is waiting on one gig booking and definitely has another so I wouldn't be able to commit. Others may be away or have other plans.

Original poster
Geminijust · 21/02/2023 14:05

Thing is, the road would be closed, impacting those not taking part, so we can't really go ahead if the majority don't want it. There was the option to say they're not interested so think it's rude to not even acknowledge people making an effort, even if it's thanks but no thanks!

OP posts:
lazycats · 21/02/2023 14:05

YABVU for thinking 17 responses is a small amount.

Ponderingwindow · 21/02/2023 14:05

You got 17 households to respond. More might join in as plans coalesce, they just don’t want to plan. You are crazy to not proceed.

LucyLeave · 21/02/2023 14:06

I'd plan on going out for the day if I was one of your neighbours.