Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be disappointed at poor response re street party

494 replies

Geminijust · 21/02/2023 13:58

Smallish, quiet street, approx 45 houses, generally pretty friendly. Neighbour & I thought it might be nice to throw a party for the coronation. Council encouraging it by offering road closures & free insurance.

Sent out a note with a return slip asking people to say if they would interested, if they would be willing to help and inviting comments & suggestions. Gave them 2 weeks to respond. Deadline has passed and we have 17 responses, all positive, but that's less than half the street! AIBU to think it's really disappointing and actually rather rude :-(

Think we're going to send text to those that bothered to respond thanking them but, as we don't have a majority, informing them we will not be proceeding.

😐

OP posts:
lieselotte · 21/02/2023 15:00

Guavafish1 · 21/02/2023 14:55

I would knock-on neighbours doors for response

Nothing like exerting pressure on people!

Prescottdanni123 · 21/02/2023 15:00

Some people will have their own plans. Some people will not be bothered. 17 is a very good number. And will be presumably 40+ people at least?

Cheesyball · 21/02/2023 15:00

My neighbors opposite did a Jubilee street party and I did just that. Caused so much anxiety thinking about been sat in my house and everyone being able to see me and think how rude I was for not going over.

fantasmasgoria1 · 21/02/2023 15:01

As others have said 17 is a good response. Many people don't support the royal family as they did years ago so would not be interested. You never know once the party is underway it may tempt others to join in.

NursieBernard · 21/02/2023 15:02

YABU to label people as rude for not replying. Some people are busy, they may have bigger issues than the coronation to think about, they may not care about the coronation or dislike social situations. It is not rude of them to not reply, you have asked a question and they've chosen not to answer for whatever reason.

Kennykenkencat · 21/02/2023 15:03

People don’t think ahead and plan. You gave them 2 weeks to respond. 17 houses replied. Probably more will get involved when things get closer to the date.
Its like a childrens party

Very few respond without you directly asking. People have a lot of things going on in their lives and if an event isn’t on the horizon within the next week they don’t think about it.

purplecorkheart · 21/02/2023 15:03

To be honest unless it is in a envelope when it comes in my letterbox it is very likely to go into the recycling bin without it being read as it would be assumed as junk mail.

BellatrixLestrangesHeatedCurlers · 21/02/2023 15:05

17 is 17 households, surely? So could be a person on their own or a family of five?

BorisJohnsonsCumrag · 21/02/2023 15:06

I'd just be grateful not everyone responded.

If asked for their honest opinion about whether it's even appropriate to hold a party for a monarch while many in the country struggle, you might get some shocking responses.

Let them eat cake!

PuddlesPityParty · 21/02/2023 15:07

i would hate to join a street party 😂 what’s rude is your assumption everyone wants one!

Greensleeves · 21/02/2023 15:09

Geminijust · 21/02/2023 14:05

Thing is, the road would be closed, impacting those not taking part, so we can't really go ahead if the majority don't want it. There was the option to say they're not interested so think it's rude to not even acknowledge people making an effort, even if it's thanks but no thanks!

What fucking effort?! You want a party, you want your neighbours to make it happen for you, so you've sent out an invitation. It's not some altruistic act of public-spiritness, and people don't have to comply.

Personally I would rather have my nipples removed with a blunt spoon than attend some dreadful cap-doffing affair celebrating the further enrichment of one the richest and most socially clueless people in Britain. Nor would I be thrilled at the road being closed so that flag-shaggers could block up the street with nonsense. Maybe your neighbours feel the same.

lieselotte · 21/02/2023 15:09

I'm someone who always responds to things so find it odd when people don't

Really, so every time someone puts a flyer through your door you reply to them and say "no thanks"? Yeah right. You reply to the things you think worth replying to, and so do your neighbours.

lieselotte · 21/02/2023 15:09

*Nor would I be thrilled at the road being closed so that flag-shaggers could block up the street with nonsense. Maybe your neighbours feel the same(

Grin
bumblefeline · 21/02/2023 15:09

God I could not think of anything worse. I hope you don't block people's driveways etc trying to escape the bloody nonsense of it all. Least half your street are normal, thank god.

Twillow · 21/02/2023 15:09

It's not rude not to reply! It would be ruder to reply saying I couldn't care less, wouldn't it (as I might have...)?
I think you got quite a positive response considering.

Ponoka7 · 21/02/2023 15:09

I would have put it to one side meaning to fill it in and then be amazed that it's two weeks later. There'll be people planning a long weekend away/day out/visiting family, but still haven't organised it etc so don't know what they'll be doing. I'd do a bit of door knocking.

diamondpony80 · 21/02/2023 15:10

Wow, that's a lot more than I expected. Very impressive. It's a holiday weekend so surely most people will have plans? We're going to go visit family, as I'm sure others will too.

pizzaHeart · 21/02/2023 15:10

Have you made it absolutely clear about the road closure?
Also these two are different issues, I might be ok with the road closure but not interested/ not being able to take part in the party e.g if I’m going to be away.

lieselotte · 21/02/2023 15:11

HangerLaneGyratorySystem · 21/02/2023 14:55

My neighbours do this regularly. They let people know, so that they can then get the permission by telling the council no one objected. Basically its a clique of around 6 households who bully everyone else, they have a closed facebook/whatsapp group and talk about how brilliant they are for organising a drinking party for their friends (they invite people from far and wide and sell tickets). Anyone who objects will be sent to Coventry. The disco starts around noon and goes on till 9 or later - its intense noise that you can't get away from in any part of the house or garden, your car is blocked in if you don't get up early to move it and if you want to go out to get into your car or walk the dog, you have to walk the gauntlet of cat calls and jeers from the clique and their mates who are off their face by lunchtime. Oh and they collect money for it and woe betide anyone who doesn't put their hand in their pocket. When notes through the door don't work they come round and doorstep people.

Its a "nice" middle class village and anyone who objects is a "spoilsport". OP you are not doing anyone a favour, you are doing what you want.

That sounds horrific. But can't you object after the event and ask the council not to allow it in future?

PuddlesPityParty · 21/02/2023 15:11

Guavafish1 · 21/02/2023 14:55

I would knock-on neighbours doors for response

If they’re a mumsnetter they wouldn’t answer though 😉

BorisJohnsonsCumrag · 21/02/2023 15:11

Greensleeves · 21/02/2023 15:09

What fucking effort?! You want a party, you want your neighbours to make it happen for you, so you've sent out an invitation. It's not some altruistic act of public-spiritness, and people don't have to comply.

Personally I would rather have my nipples removed with a blunt spoon than attend some dreadful cap-doffing affair celebrating the further enrichment of one the richest and most socially clueless people in Britain. Nor would I be thrilled at the road being closed so that flag-shaggers could block up the street with nonsense. Maybe your neighbours feel the same.

Show quote history

My hero.

Whataretheodds · 21/02/2023 15:12

Geminijust · 21/02/2023 14:05

Thing is, the road would be closed, impacting those not taking part, so we can't really go ahead if the majority don't want it. There was the option to say they're not interested so think it's rude to not even acknowledge people making an effort, even if it's thanks but no thanks!

So? You didn't ask people if they minded the road closure. You asked if they wanted to participate.

There are bound to be people who don't want to participate but don't mind if the road is closed. Why don't you ask them?

You're being a bit weird about this. It can't be a surprise that you don't have 100% wanting to commit now to celebrating the monarchy?

Lcb123 · 21/02/2023 15:12

That’s an incredible response. The rest prob just forgot / aren’t around / aren’t interested. You only asked for responses from those interested to join. Its a really long time away

Hawkins003 · 21/02/2023 15:15

Geminijust · 21/02/2023 14:05

Thing is, the road would be closed, impacting those not taking part, so we can't really go ahead if the majority don't want it. There was the option to say they're not interested so think it's rude to not even acknowledge people making an effort, even if it's thanks but no thanks!

Close it anyway, you'll not usually get 100/ plus presuming it's only a day and others could still access their drives it would just be eg a no through road etc

pollykitty · 21/02/2023 15:16

That’s a great response, your expectations are too high. I organize a Halloween event in my neighborhood every year and get about 30 participating out of probably 150 houses