Skinny privellege

[Annabella91]

Why is there shops full of clothes for women who are skinnt but nothing bigger i hate going clothes literally can never find anything in a size 16 it's all size 6 and 8 is the fat back in the 90s discrimination trend coming in again?? Shouldn't need to skinny to look nice??

Yet many would say that carb reduction (and I'm talking about the enlightened ones) that have scientific proof as well as real world results would say that EHAT you are eating is probably more important. Carbs turn to sugars. Fact. The solution if course would be to heavily tax or tax out if existence fast food places. Disclaimer I've just eaten a burger king. But obvs wouldn't have died without it

I find that to maintain a slim physique I have to deny myself a lot of things I want to eat. So if I have skinny privilege then fat people have eating privilege where they can really enjoy their food.

The OP is sounding more irate and passive aggressive with every response and it’s clear there are bigger issues affecting her, that I’m not sure this thread is doing her mental health any good. It might be a good idea to close this thread mumsnet!

Many absolutely do work hard to stay slim. Just
because you see them eating takeaways and drinking doesn’t mean they always eat like that. You can still have takeouts sometimes and still lose weight or maintain a healthy weight.

The trouble is that you have set it up in your mind that everyone who is skinny/thin/slim has it easy and privilege over people who are bigger. This isn’t true and even if it was, it doesn’t help you.

You clearly do not like being the size that you are and maybe you need to cut yourself some slack as you have just had a baby but in time work on getting yourself into a healthier weight.

Right now you seem fixed in a victim mentality when your weight is something within your control and your ire towards thinner people is absolutely misplaced.

Agreed. I have to watch what I eat to simply maintain my weight. I don’t call that a privilege. It’s hard work.

Agreed.

OP sounds very emotional, negative and like she has a victim complex. That's a much bigger problem than her size.

I think lots of people misunderstand what privilege means in this respect.

'Like all forms of privilege, the person who has it may not realize they have any advantage, because it's simply normal for them to, say, not have to think about whether they can fit between tables in a tiny bistro, whether their size clothing will be readily available, or whether they can eat in public without being stared at. Public spaces and furniture — chairs, benches, tables, bus and theatre seats — are designed with smaller people in mind, and we wrongly judge each other by body size and shape as if it were a measure of a person’s moral success or failure.'

Another way to look at it

'it's important to remember that privilege does not mean you live a life 100% free of hardship, pain or difficulty. It simply means that you may have traits or characteristics that provide some advantages in our society.'

But yeah..eating privilege. FFS.

PatientlyWaiting21
Agreed!

It's quickly becoming a thread of people with their own weight issues and hangups getting annoyed and viewing everything through that lens. Whilst it might make some posters feel better in the moment it's not terribly healthy.

If anyone, OP or other posters, are so hung up on perpetuating their victim status, they're better off speaking to someone properly to get support with their weight issues. No amount of people objectively unwanted comments about anyone's body are crappy and shops cater to their business model not individual people's preferences and personal build/weight distribution is going to help the people who are wedded to the idea of a conspiracy.

Just changing the topic slightly here but it seems to be coming up a lot with posters saying 'But I work REALLY hard to stay slim. I deny myself foods. I have to be really disciplined.'

I think people get angry that because THEY have done it, they do not see why allowances should be made for other people to have to navigate life with the same level of respect they receive, or comfort.

Because we are told that 'If you lose weight, you will be more attractive, you will have better luck with finding a partner, you will be more popular.' So the idea of sharing that with someone who hasnt given up what you have, worked as hard as you have, is jarring.

Its one of the reasons there can be such vitriol towards the plus size movement. Because it rejects the idea that you need to be slim to be happy. And that stings to those who feel like they EARNED it.

I find this very surprising. To know the occasional person maybe. But loads? Pretty much everyone I know who is slim, well, it's fairly obvious why. They may eat takeaways and drink, but they're reducing their overall intake in other ways that may be less apparent, or are very active. Obviously there are variations down to age, sex and frame with bigger younger men able to eat a lot more than smaller older women. But if you compare a bunch of women of the same age, apart from rare exceptions (which these threads attract) the slim ones will take in fewer, or burn more, calories than the heavier ones.
Not eating a lot doesn't make people superior but it does usually make them thinner.

@Seasonofthewitch83 your posts are spot on.

Threads about weight tend to bring up the same opinions. My own view from what I've seen on the threads about weight is that a lot of women are massively proud of being thin/slim. They secretly hate the fact that there are overweight women who don't hate themselves for being overweight.

Yes, I think there's a lot of truth in this. I think there's definitely an element of wanting sacrifice recognised.
However I also think there's some justification when people get irritated at the belief that being slim is a 'privilege'. Couched in such terms it suggests something people should be grateful for and that they should have special empathy and consideration for those less lucky. That they should allow people without that 'privilege' to comment on their bodies using whatever term the non slim person sees fit.
The reality is few of us are fat or thin as a fixed characteristic, as in we were born that way and will die that way. Many of us move from one to the other and maybe back again, with age and life stages. To suggest a woman is privileged because at a certain point in her life she happens to be a size 8 and not a 16, whether through effort or (rarer) 'natural' disposition, is an irritating misuse of the term.

I know of people who eat takeaways never diet abs drink a lot of alcohol but still remain slim also they never exercise they drive everywhere lol slim people don't always work hard to be that way.

I’ll be 60 this year and am still much the same size and weight as 40 years ago. If you saw me eating - lots of lovely crisps and burgers - you’d think I was very lucky to be slim, but the thing is I only eat when I actually feel hungry. I eat what I want when I want, but only when I’m hungry. Don’t feel hungry until I’ve been up for 5 hours, so never eat breakfast, while other people hear “breakfast is the most important meal of the day” so eat it whether or not they’re hungry. Went through a phase of believing it myself, and had a bowl of porridge every morning when I got to work - it just kick-started my appetite and made me eat much more during the day.

Eat when you’re hungry
Drink when you’re dry
If the moonshine don’t get you
You’ll live till you die

I'm pre-disposed to bring skinny/slim/thin and have to make sure I eat extra food so I don't look too underweight

You're not a bad person, but your statement is completely false.

The average size of a UK woman is size 16.

Of course shops cater for them, it's their actual business to make clothes and money.

I know someone, daughter of a friend who as an adult is 5ft tall and weighs 5 stone

She eats every 2 hours a huge meal. Her life revolves around food.

People think she has bulimia but she doesn’t. It is a genetic thing as she has relatives on her dads side who have the same thing

Given what I have seen this now woman go through her whole life, whilst people might love the idea of eating anything they want
and still being slim this woman’s life is ruled by food. It costs her not only money but time out of her life.

I know someone, daughter of a friend who as an adult is 5ft tall and weighs 5 stone

She eats every 2 hours a huge meal. Her life revolves around food

Surely a medical problem?

Obviously, being bullied about your weight is dreadful and shouldn’t have happened. But it’s not true to say that shops don’t cater over a size 14. Whether you think saying this untrue thing makes you bad or mentally ill is the point. Most women are not skipping around the shops looking for new clothes in their pre-pregnancy size or thereabouts just six weeks after giving birth. And it’s winter. Everyone’s in baggy jumpers and loose trousers as far as I can see, not denim shorts and vest tops.

while other people hear “breakfast is the most important meal of the day”

”Breakfast is the most important meal of the day” was a Kellogg’s marketing slogan dating from the 19th century.

Obviously a very effective one.

Oakbeam · Today 15:11

while other people hear “breakfast is the most important meal of the day”

”Breakfast is the most important meal of the day” was a Kellogg’s marketing slogan dating from the 19th century.

Obviously a very effective one.

mind blown

I'm wearing jeans and stuff now I stopped wearing pregnancy stuff like 3 weeks ago. I have couple of size 18 jeans and a few tops that fit me I don't like baggy clothes I never have it just depressing when i see other who had babies at the same time that look great but I don't iv only lost 2 stone after birth that's it I'm stuck 3 stone heavier I just need some clothes that look decent until I lose the weight needs to by gone by summer so I can go out on family days out without feeling like a frumpy I hate the way I look at the moment I just want to be slim like I was before.

I'm jealous that I don't look good at the moment I cry when going shopping makes me feel worthless

Op. Chin up. Some people, me included have disputed your statements about privilege etc. But please don’t beat yourself up. You’ve done something wonderful in bringing a new life into this world and no one feels great after that. I hope you can find some clothes that tide you over. Your weight can be addressed in the coming months. What seems impossible now will be achievable, with, excuse the pun, baby steps. Best wishes x

Surely losing two stone since the birth -only six weeks ago! - is great going. Why compare yourself to others? Other people’s weight makes no difference to you. Only you are on your journey. I really think going shopping for new clothes just after you have given birth is a bit crazy. If it makes you feel bad, don’t do it. No one needs new clothes. Surely most women who have just had a baby aren’t actually giving any time to how they look at this stage -they’re too busy. Wait till spring/summer. Or as other have said, there are plenty of shops selling clothes in all sizes if you can’t wait. Or can you do your hair or nails instead if you want to feel you look better -just as a temporary measure?