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Original poster

To take DD back to the GP for her weight

205 replies

christmassedout · 19/02/2023 15:54

DD has just turned 9 and is very overweight. We've been trying to tackle it through diet and exercise since xmas. Her belly has been huge for a while now, if it was smaller she still wouldn't be slim, but it looks enormous in proportion to the rest of her. We were really struggling to buy clothes to fit her because of it.

She's had a growth spurt since Christmas and seems to have slimmed down around her arms and legs. Her weight has dropped slightly. But she's measuring even bigger around the belly.

I've taken her to the GP before and they were very dismissive. I would really like them to do some kind of tests to make sure there isn't anything else going on, DP thinks it's only been two months and they'll say she's just overweight.

OP posts:
MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 19/02/2023 15:58

What did the GP say?

Merryoldgoat · 19/02/2023 15:58

What is she eating and is it possible she’s eating secretly?

My DS had put on weight and was quite chubby but very small differences in food made a quick difference.

So if there have been significant changes in 2 months I’d expect to see a difference.

I have weight problems that started around her age and that’s when I started eating secretly.

Merryoldgoat · 19/02/2023 15:59

And whilst this may sound bonkers there’s no chance she’s pregnant is there?

iusedtobeasize8 · 19/02/2023 16:01

Merryoldgoat · 19/02/2023 15:59

And whilst this may sound bonkers there’s no chance she’s pregnant is there?

She's 9 ! 😮

Ohdearnotagain76 · 19/02/2023 16:02

How much have you changed her diet? Can you ask for a referral to a dietitian. Does she do any physical exercises. Donyou have a school nurse? Also try not to worry, your doing the right thing by Tring to tackle it.

Hellocatshome · 19/02/2023 16:03

Does her belly look bloated or flabby? Just wondering if its worth asking for a scan to check that her belly is due to fat rather than something else.

VladmirsPoutine · 19/02/2023 16:03

Is she NT? Does she eat what you as a family eat? Do you have a gauge on actually how much / how often she eats, by this I mean you don't find empty packets of crisps/wrappers randomly around the house?
If there are no other issues then I can see why the GP probably thinks this is down to you and your husband to manage but if not what sort of other issues would you suspect might be causing her weight?

Merryoldgoat · 19/02/2023 16:06

@iusedtobeasize8

Yes. 9yo girls can have started their periods and can also be abused.

It’s absolutely not a nice thought and not one I think is likely but I’d want to ensure it was ruled out with an unusually large stomach getting bigger even with weight loss measures and intervention.

Kids are quite receptive to losing weight. We cut two yoghurts a day from my son’s diet and he noticeably lost weight over a month.

what OP describes is unusual.

Merryoldgoat · 19/02/2023 16:06

Responsive - not receptive.

Changingplace · 19/02/2023 16:07

I know she’s only 9 but is she starting puberty?

How long have you noticed her weight creeping up if you started thinking about it at Christmas?

Smoothlines · 19/02/2023 16:08

Is she snacking secretly? Buying sweets on the way to school or at school?

NancyJoan · 19/02/2023 16:10

I remember your post at Christmas, OP. is she still going to her Dad and eating all sorts of crap there?

what have you actually done differently since you last went to the GP?

Original poster
christmassedout · 19/02/2023 16:12

I don't know what other issues might be causing it, but she's slimming down everywhere else and her belly is just getting bigger and bigger. She's actually lost a small amount of weight and grown a few cm. That isn't normal, surely?

It's starting to look quite rounded like a pregnant belly, I think because it's so big there's nowhere else for it to go. But it's wobbly, not firm.

We've completely changed her diet at home, but she still eats a lot of fast food, doughnuts, milkshakes etc at her dad's, which I can't control.

OP posts:
Merryoldgoat · 19/02/2023 16:15

We've completely changed her diet at home, but she still eats a lot of fast food, doughnuts, milkshakes etc at her dad's, which I can't control.

Assuming she sees her dad frequently the changes you make will have limited impact then.

Is she aware of being overweight?

Wolfiefan · 19/02/2023 16:15

If she’s still eating that then it’s pointless going back to the GP.

readingismycardio · 19/02/2023 16:17

christmassedout · 19/02/2023 16:12

I don't know what other issues might be causing it, but she's slimming down everywhere else and her belly is just getting bigger and bigger. She's actually lost a small amount of weight and grown a few cm. That isn't normal, surely?

It's starting to look quite rounded like a pregnant belly, I think because it's so big there's nowhere else for it to go. But it's wobbly, not firm.

We've completely changed her diet at home, but she still eats a lot of fast food, doughnuts, milkshakes etc at her dad's, which I can't control.

Hi, OP!

Sorry you're going through this. How often is she going to her dad's? Also, can you post an example of a day of food? What meals, etc? It might seem that she's in a calorie deficit, when she actually isn't

Hellocatshome · 19/02/2023 16:19

From a quick Google

"Other causes of a bloated belly
irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)
ulcerative colitis.
Crohn's disease.
food intolerance.
gallstones.
ovarian cysts.
celiac disease."

However your update suggests this could still be food related as Dad is not on board with the healthy eating.

maranella · 19/02/2023 16:21

she still eats a lot of fast food, doughnuts, milkshakes etc at her dad's

Uh okay, but if you can't do anything about this @christmassedout, why do you think the GP will be able to? There isn't some magic switch s/he can flip and your DD will lose the weight she's piling on because your ex overfeeds her with crap. Is he neglectful or abusive in other ways?

Mariposa26 · 19/02/2023 16:24

I think you need to sort out her diet at her dad’s as a first port of call. Can he not understand that a 9 year old shouldn’t be eating like that and it’s unhealthy for her? Can you talk to him?

olivewreath13 · 19/02/2023 16:25

Because she is losing weight. She's lost a few pounds since xmas and grown a few cm, but she's 3/4 of an inch bigger around the belly.

wildseas · 19/02/2023 16:26

If she’s grown taller and is also lighter since Christmas then you’re on the right track - keep going with what you’re doing. Are there any other healthy swaps that you can make?

One thing which you can do to help at her dads is get her in the habit of having a big glass of water before she eats at yours and then send her to her dads with a water bottle. It won’t stop him feeding her crap but she’s much less likely to eat past the point of being full if she’s well hydrated, and he’s less likely to give her sweet drinks if they’re out and she has a water bottle.

The second thing which I think you can do is lots of praise and compliments for the healthy eating. I’d stay away from weight as much as possible but “do you know I think your hair is more shiny since you’ve been eating so healthily” and “oh my goodness you’re getting so tall - it must be the healthy food” and “I’m so proud of you eating such a lot of lovely vegetables- it’s doing you such a lot of good”. Might he provide more fruit and veg if she was asking for it?

Summerfun54321 · 19/02/2023 16:27

We've completely changed her diet at home, but she still eats a lot of fast food, doughnuts, milkshakes etc at her dad's, which I can't control.

That's the root of the problem then isn't it. What are you expecting the GP to do about it?

Dotcheck · 19/02/2023 16:30

I have heard of people who became very bloated due to an allergy/ food intolerance. Does she have a lot of dairy?

AndTheSurveySays · 19/02/2023 16:31

If the belly is rounded and getting bigger despite her having lost weight then I think it would be a good idea to talk to the GP again.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 19/02/2023 16:32

Fast food, doughnuts and milkshakes. Well, obviously this isn't the only issue - but it sounds as though she is consuming a lot of wheat and dairy.

Coeliac Disease causes a lot of bloating. As does lactose intolerance - something that can present as secondary to untreated Coeliac Disease as a result of the part of the gut that processes lactose being damaged by the autoimmune process.

Not all Coeliacs are thin and pale. Some are overweight and obese and very, very hungry.