Should I bring up the texts I saw to dh?

[rainyspring]

Dh gave me his phone to watch some videos and I saw a message pop up from his work colleague saying

"Yeah I know, she's too beautiful" so I just clicked on it and basically my husband started the convo to his colleague (male) about another colleague, saying "oh you can't miss her mate, she's stunning, absolutely beautiful"

To which the colleague goes "yeah quite taller than you though you will need ladders"

To my husband goes "that was what crossed my mind, imagine doggy style I would need a rope ha ha ha, every time she looks at me I get a hard on"

And then colleague replied with the above.

I want to mention it, but it will cause an argument and don't want to do that in front of my small children but is this normal lad convo I shouldn't have read?
I just feel kinda disgusted.

Would you mention it?

Please teach your poor daughters to expect better than this from the men in their lives. And show their poor teacher some respect at the same time. No wonder teenagers show them no respect in the classroom - honestly, grow up.

Wow.

I wonder how he would react to the news that he has been reported at work for sexual harassment, sexist behaviour, inappropriate text messages, and generally being a disgusting misogynistic creep?

Ask him, and see what he says.

No reputable workplace wants to have sexual predators and sexist bastards in their mix.

One screenshot of that kind of shit and he's history.

Your move.

Since he often mentions women around you, start mentioning men around him (especially in detail about their impressive anatomy) and see how he likes it. That's a serious suggestion. Only to be petty though – with or without that, I wouldn't ever want to waste my life and disrespect myself being married to someone that revolting.

Do you know what I’d probably anonymously forward screenshots of the convo to the HR dept. I think it’s absolutely unacceptable and I’d be mortified if I knew male colleagues had been saying this about me or another female colleague. I’d teach them both an anonymous lesson. X

LTB

You're completely missing the point of that person's post. They were saying you going "ooh hot bod, I fancy that teacher" isn't quite the same as OP's husband talking about the logistics of doggy style etc with his coworker.

But your latest post "no wonder men cheat" shows me you have very little self respect for yourself 😔😔 I often feel sorry for women like these.

Nothing funny about it

finding that text grim and misogynistic is absolutely the right response.

Finding it funny if you are a woman is unhealthy and probably the forced mindset of someone with some self esteem and boundary issues

If it wasn't detailed you didn't do what OP's DH did.

No it's not normal. If his work ever saw that him and his colleague would be fired for sexual misconduct discussing her like that!

I'd also be very worried he meant he was at least looking to cheat. So disrespectful. If colleagues say he's a player it's because he is or because he's constantly talking about other women.

I'd be Ok if DP acknowledged a woman was beautiful or pretty if someone else brought it up. But the sexual comments and his instigating it is beyond the pale.

And id get checked for STDs

OP, if it were me I'd ask him about the conversation. If he goes all defensive and accuses you of snooping on his phone, just remind him that he'd given you his phone to watch some videos.

He comes across as a pathetic sleaze. Ultimately, I just couldn’t be attracted to a man like this l. His whole persona sounds so off putting. Ai, that would end the relationship.

Fool. Sold his wife's trust for a joke about a woman he'll never have

Horrible .

Do you think it's an acceptable way for two colleagues to talk about another colleague? Seriously?

Your boundaries are way off. Don’t project that on to the OP or other posters.

I don't think you can read. Every poster has said finding others attractive is normal and OK. That's not what this was.

her husband was probably joking aswell

Going around like a dog with two dicks isn't remotely normal.

Screenshot the conversation and make it his wallpaper. A sure fire way to let him know you've seen it without you actually mentioning it.

@Justine2884 Are you from Liverpool? I'm only asking cause I am and just getting that vibe, although I could be wrong.
I get what you mean with fancying other people and that's normal, but don't you think what her husband said was a bit far like climbing a rope to do doggy and saying she makes him hard? I wouldn't be happy if I found them messages.