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Original poster

MIL has my Valentine gift

368 replies

CloudySuns · 14/02/2023 07:57

About 5 years ago, DH bought me a few gifts for valentines day including a mug, it was very distinctive being red with 'love you' on it.

I really liked this mug. It would cheer me up whenever I looked at it, it was a perfect size for my coffee, comfy handle, just a nice mug. I used it daily.

A few years ago we stayed with MIL between house moves for 4 weeks, and I took my favourite mug.

I noticed her using it a few times, fine, okay, fair enough we were staying there. But when we moved out, and I couldn't find this mug. I swear I packed it but it wasn't in the box with other mugs.

The next time we visited MIL, I noticed my mug in her cupboard. I thought oh good, I can't have packed it! I brought it out and said I'd been looking for it and phew there it was!

She said NO that's her mug. That someone bought it for her. I asked who? She couldn't remember.

This mug is very distinctive, even with a little scratch I made by accident the first week I had it, so I know it's my mug.

Of course I'd be a right knob to have argued further, so I put it back in her cupboard. It's just a mug but every valentines day I think about it and it irks me! It was my mug!

OP posts:
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5
IwasToldThereWouldBeCake · 14/02/2023 10:14

She is bonkers in a sweet, daft way. Be the bigger person, let her have the mug.

You stole her sons heart, she stole your mug 😂😂😂. Mug love.

If you steal it back, she will create a drama about it. This is taunting, she is letting her petty jealousy seep out. Ignore it all.

Redebs · 14/02/2023 10:17

This is so bizarre!
Did she take it because she was jealous? Did she need some love?

You could steal it back if it's bothering you, but let's hope you don't discover you hadn't lost it and end up with two🤣🤣

GoodChat · 14/02/2023 10:18

louise5754 · 14/02/2023 10:03

Is she single / a widower? Maybe she's never had anyone buy her anything like this before. Maybe it makes her feel as though someone bought it for her? But still it's bound to open up questions especially from you.

I know it's not about the money but that does look like a really cheap mug. Can your husband get you another nicer new one?

She doesn't want a 'nicer' new one. She's said how much she loves that one.

Kittycat37uk · 14/02/2023 10:24

I'd have smashed it onto the floor and told her it's not her mug and that if I can't have it back no one is having it then again I'm very petty and don't put up with any type of crap

endoftheworldniteclub · 14/02/2023 10:26

Kittycat37uk · 14/02/2023 10:24

I'd have smashed it onto the floor and told her it's not her mug and that if I can't have it back no one is having it then again I'm very petty and don't put up with any type of crap

That’s just unhinged

amonsteronthehill · 14/02/2023 10:27

Just stump up and buy the identical, new £14 mug.

MIl clearly has issues BUT she put you two up for 4 weeks and clearly desperately wanted to feel loved for it and wanted that mug.

I'm only saying this because it's a mug. And you have found the replacement which won't break the bank, so to speak.

Itisbetter · 14/02/2023 10:28

I think dh loves you the mug, box of chocs and him in full stealth balaclava will be on your bed tonight. Anything less is just not Valentines Day.

BananaBender · 14/02/2023 10:29

Get it back. Fuck her.

Has she always been jealous of your relationship with DH or does she just hate you for some random reason?

I’m going to need an update when you get it back @CloudySuns .

BloodyMabel · 14/02/2023 10:32

Buy a plain red mug from the charity shop/pound shop, break it, put it in her bin. Oh sorry, it fell into my bag out of the cupboard!

louise5754 · 14/02/2023 10:32

@GoodChat I know I know but if the MIL genuinely believes it's hers it's better to move on.

mumda · 14/02/2023 10:32

Just wash up next time you're there. Clumsy you. Sweep up the pieces!

Or just buy yourself another mug. And never take a precious mug to anyone else's house again.

louise5754 · 14/02/2023 10:33

@Kittycat37uk

You ok?

VanGoghsDog · 14/02/2023 10:34

Write your name on the bottom with Sharpie then one day tip it up and say "on, no, look this one IS my one afterall".

TheFretfulPorpentine · 14/02/2023 10:36

It's only a mug and you've managed without it for years, why give it headspace?

PuddlesPityParty · 14/02/2023 10:37

Couldyounot · 14/02/2023 09:19

Get a mug made up with "DON'T STEAL MY STUFF" on it, and swap it for yours. Job done.

🤣

Catspyjamas17 · 14/02/2023 10:39

Definitely take it back next time you are there. Then use it when she comes to your house, see if she says anything.

Kittycat37uk · 14/02/2023 10:39

I'm good just a really petty person who at nearly 40 years old sees how cheeky one cf can be and raises them absolute pettiness lol

redbigbananafeet · 14/02/2023 10:39

CloudySuns · 14/02/2023 07:57

About 5 years ago, DH bought me a few gifts for valentines day including a mug, it was very distinctive being red with 'love you' on it.

I really liked this mug. It would cheer me up whenever I looked at it, it was a perfect size for my coffee, comfy handle, just a nice mug. I used it daily.

A few years ago we stayed with MIL between house moves for 4 weeks, and I took my favourite mug.

I noticed her using it a few times, fine, okay, fair enough we were staying there. But when we moved out, and I couldn't find this mug. I swear I packed it but it wasn't in the box with other mugs.

The next time we visited MIL, I noticed my mug in her cupboard. I thought oh good, I can't have packed it! I brought it out and said I'd been looking for it and phew there it was!

She said NO that's her mug. That someone bought it for her. I asked who? She couldn't remember.

This mug is very distinctive, even with a little scratch I made by accident the first week I had it, so I know it's my mug.

Of course I'd be a right knob to have argued further, so I put it back in her cupboard. It's just a mug but every valentines day I think about it and it irks me! It was my mug!

Next time you go just take the mug. When you get home write your name on it with a sharpie or have your husband write a note on it. She knows it's yours.

GnomeDePlume · 14/02/2023 10:40

I totally get how frustrating it is when someone blatantly takes something then lies about it.

Someone once stole my scarf at school. When challenged they said they had bought it yet it was quite plainly a granny knitted scarf! It was the bare faced lie which got my goat. Still rankles now 40 years later!

Kittycat37uk · 14/02/2023 10:41

@endoftheworldniteclub nope just a person who doesn't put up with cf and their cf ways

ScottishLavender · 14/02/2023 10:41

Kittycat37uk · 14/02/2023 10:24

I'd have smashed it onto the floor and told her it's not her mug and that if I can't have it back no one is having it then again I'm very petty and don't put up with any type of crap

Wow. If I saw you do that I'd quietly ease my family away from you and not make contact again.

Tratjymp · 14/02/2023 10:42

Next time you go there, accidentally break it.

redbigbananafeet · 14/02/2023 10:43

CloudySuns · 14/02/2023 09:11

I think the reason I haven't nabbed it back is the slight chance she genuinely believes it's hers, and the thought of her confused face trying to find it.

I just mentioned it to DH and he's said he can get it back if I want it. He's laughing a lot too.

She's had it for ages now though!

The "if I want it" in this offer from your husband annoys me. It's putting it on you as though you're being petty. He should just get it back because it is yours not his mothers.

Rinkydinkydoodle · 14/02/2023 10:44

Triflenot · 14/02/2023 09:48

I don’t think I’d bother getting it back. It wouldn’t be the same, I’d probably end up feeling uncomfortable every time I used it.

This, it’s been made weird now (by MIL) I’m also with the OP that I probably couldn’t take it back just in case MIL genuinely did believe it was hers and with that (irrational) fear in mind I’d need to hide the damn thing every time she came round. However I would seriously consider spending £14 on a replacement set of matching ILY mugs with our NAMES on and pointedly making our tea in them when she popped over for a cuppa but that’s a bit passive aggressive innit😂

Kittycat37uk · 14/02/2023 10:45

@ScottishLavender good for u I an that petty I would smash my house up if it was to make a point to someone then happily sort it all out later yes I am petty and unhinged and not a person to be crossed BUT people know instantly where they stand with me and their is no pretences also those I love that love me back also know I have a big heart and would do anything for anyone but cross me and see what happens.