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AIBU?

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Original poster

Sonographer unsure on sex

165 replies

Anonymousoneo · 12/02/2023 23:06

I had my 20 week scan last week and I can't get what the Sonographer said out of my head. He was pretty sure it was a girl but he wasn't certain he said there's nothing obvious between legs but he couldn't get a clear enough shot to confirm for sure. He said he would be very surprised if baby turnt out to be a boy. I'm so nervous to go out buying girly bits🥲

OP posts:
tiredhadenough · 12/02/2023 23:07

You don't need to buy anything! You'll get given loads just enjoy your pregnancy and don't worry about whether you're having a boy or a girl 🤷🏼‍♀️

Coffeellama · 12/02/2023 23:07

You could book another scan at a private clinic to try and find out if you want?

Businessflake · 12/02/2023 23:07

Well don’t then. Plenty are parents to be manage without knowing the sex if their baby in advance. They manage just fine.

Octonaut4Life · 12/02/2023 23:08

Your girl will still be a girl if she's dressed in gender neutral clothing.

TheUsualChaos · 12/02/2023 23:09

Two options.

  1. Don't buy lots of girls clothes and wait and see.
  2. Pay for a scan to look again.
Roundabout78 · 12/02/2023 23:10

Buy neutral clothes. Even if you book a private scan, it’s never 100%.

Singleandproud · 12/02/2023 23:10

Your girl will still be a girl in blue and your a boy a boy in pink it really doesn't matter babies can't even see pastels etc.

Changingplace · 12/02/2023 23:11

Just buy generic baby clothes, it really doesn’t need to be wall wall pink or blue and even if it was, a baby has no concept of ‘girl/boy’ clothes.

NonJeNeRegretteRien · 12/02/2023 23:12

Both sonographers I had said “I think….”

i was under the impression that this is just their get out clause they say to everyone.

go for a private scan if you’d like extra reassurance, or just buy some neutral colours for the first couple of outfits, once baby is here you can go crazy.

Skiphopbump · 12/02/2023 23:12

At 20 weeks I was told I was having a girl. The next scan the sonographer was doubtful but the baby was in an awkward position. Next scan was very clear baby was a boy!

Hangupsrus · 12/02/2023 23:12

I was told this same thing at my 20 week scan op, they thought most likely girl but weren't committed to it. I paid for a scan a few weeks later which was lovely as was 3d, and sure enough it was a girl .

Eatentoomanyroses · 12/02/2023 23:13

Go for another private scan or get a blood test if you really want to know.

Hadalifeonce · 12/02/2023 23:13

White, pale lemon and green work for both sexes if you really want to buy clothes.

Testina · 12/02/2023 23:14

Hadalifeonce · 12/02/2023 23:13

White, pale lemon and green work for both sexes if you really want to buy clothes.

Pink and blue also work for both sexes 😉

Muchtoomuchtodo · 12/02/2023 23:14

YABU. Congrats on having a healthy baby.

buy neutral clothes

enjoy your pregnancy

BethFromThisIsUs · 12/02/2023 23:15

Some of us didn’t find out the sex. Shocking in this day and age, I know.

i just bought some white stuff for the first few days. Friends and family took care of the rest after the baby was born.

StrawBeretMoose · 12/02/2023 23:16

Well you could get a private scan to find out the sex, or get a test like Harmony if it's crucial to know with certainty.
There are lots of very cute babygros that aren't screaming pink or blue but if that is what you are after maybe wait until closer to your due date so the 'wrong colour' can be returned.

Oysterbabe · 12/02/2023 23:17

I didn't buy any gendered clothes. Lots of brightly coloured things with animals on or plain white if you prefer. There's a lot of choice.

Popplcroft · 12/02/2023 23:17

What are girly bits? I assume you’re not thinking of buying dresses, tampons or the like for a newborn?

buy what you want

SoCunningYouCanStickATailOnItAndCallItAFox · 12/02/2023 23:17

The 20 week check is for checking for birth defects and is a health check. Getting any information on the sex of the baby is not the purpose and many hospitals won't state it at all as too many litigious parents have gone mad on pink/blue and then tried to sue if it was wrong.
If you want a scan to get the sex you'll have to pay for a private one. This is normal.

gogohmm · 12/02/2023 23:17

I was told that they were not sure. Buy neutral

ElfDragon · 12/02/2023 23:18

Just buy nice things that you like, without being too obviously boy/girl oriented.

i only knew sex of dc3 before birth - first 2 were a surprise. First 2 were girls, and not at all harmed by only having mostly neutral bits and pieces. Dc3 is a boy, and despite knowing this, I really couldn’t justify buying a load of new stuff (and most of what I had was suitable anyway) - I bought him a couple of new bits that were just for him, but he spent a lot of time wearing his older sisters’ hand me downs. Again, no problem.

he is currently (age 10) wearing an old t shirt of dd2’s as a pyjama top. It’s pink and white stripes - entirely his choice, but he’s happy and that’s what counts.

your baby will be a boy or a girl, and will still be either a boy or a girl even if they don’t have a stereotypical pram/cot/nursery decoration/frilly dresses/whatever.

Eyerollcentral · 12/02/2023 23:19

You don’t need to buy ‘girly’ or ‘boy’ anything. Most newborn clothes are neutral colours for this reason.

JustAnotherManicMomday · 12/02/2023 23:21

Why does it matter what colour you buy? These days you don't know gender until the child is old enough to decide their own. So long as they are happy and healthy why worry. Sure if you were planning on a pink pram I might hold off purely because a pram last far more than 3 months. But regarding clothing, if you only buy up to 3 months for a set gender the worst thing is your son wears a dress for a couple months or your daughter wears trousers.

CherLloydbyCherLloyd · 12/02/2023 23:21

My eldest is a girl. We paid for a scan at 16 weeks, we had three attempts to get a good look, and the best we got was “we see no evidence of a penis” - we had our 20 week scan, and then weekly scans from 28-38 weeks and none of them could confidently say girl.
Youngest is a boy. Paid for blood test at 8 weeks which said boy. We had an extra long 12 week scan because we had a consultant who was getting trained present, the whole scan was about 45 minutes. We got chatting during this time and mentioned we were pretty certain it was a boy, the sonographer went into nub theory with us and the consultant and said it looked like a boy nub. Imagine my shock when they told us they were pretty sure it was a girl at our 20 week scan! I asked them to check again and sure enough, boy.

Had we not had the blood test I’d have been one of those women who got a surprise at birth!

Both my children had names long before they were born, so although it wouldn’t have mattered, it would still have been a shock if they came out with different bits than expected.