Sonographer unsure on sex

[Anonymousoneo]

I had my 20 week scan last week and I can't get what the Sonographer said out of my head. He was pretty sure it was a girl but he wasn't certain he said there's nothing obvious between legs but he couldn't get a clear enough shot to confirm for sure. He said he would be very surprised if baby turnt out to be a boy. I'm so nervous to go out buying girly bits🥲

I didn't find out my DDs sex before she was born and yet was perfectly able to clothe her. Kindly, grow up, the 20 week scan is for abnormalities not to help you choose pink or blue clothes.

The most important thing from your scan is that your baby was found to be healthy and developing as expected. Your baby will be gorgeous whatever, and doesn’t need ‘girly bits’ or any specific clothing to be more gorgeous and lovable.

Not everyone gets to know the gender for “buying pink or blue clothes” reasons.

We wanted to know the sex of our babies so we could name them, because we had lost so many babies previously that we never got to name, or know anything about really. Knowing their gender - and their name - helped us connect to them.

Buy neutral. I’d do that either way tbh, or certainly just babygrows and the like in whatever colour you choose.

“Girly bits” aren’t really what a baby needs. A baby needs to be comfortable above all else. A lot of the clothes that are sold are “girls’” are quite uncomfortable for a baby.

Sure, that's still not what the 20 week scan is for though. So if you have reasons to want to know and the sonography didn't reveal it/policy is not to confirm it, you have to arrange your own sex check scan.

Private scans are also less likely to confirm a girls gender on scan than a boys, it’s quite unusual for a girl to appear like a boy but common for a boys penis and testicles to be positioned in a way they are difficult to image.

Yhis is speaking from my own experience rather than any sort of insider knowledge.

My best friend was told confidently they were having a girl. I waited anxiously for news whilst she was in labour and woke up to a text at 2am telling me her baby boy had arrived safely!
Go neutral.. it's never 100%.

Just get neutral.. I didn't find out sex of baby, wasn't hard to get things for him when he was born

Babies wear clothes - both girls and boys can wear pink and blue. Mine did without any problems.

I was told the same with DC2. We already had one girl. I got some lovely brightly coloured bits. She was another girl. Her first outfit had little red elephants on. She looked adorable.

They won't say boy or girl unless they ate really sure.

I didn't think they ever said they were totally sure?

Just buy a pram in a colour you like (my friend had a pink pram for her son) and some babygros.

When I got my scan and lived in London there was a big notice in the waiting room stating do not ask the sonograoher the sex, they will not disclose. Mine actually asked me..... But then I was white/British.

They can never be 100% sure, I've known them get it wrong within the family.

In Germany with my 2nd she actually told us the sex on the nuchal scan at 13 weeks.

🙄

I'm sure OP knows the scan is to check anatomy. It's just a bonus if you can find out the sex of the baby. I always loved to know but it was always just a bonus. Baby being healthy was, of course, most important.

OP, the sonographer was a bit unsure with my first one because they couldn't see anything. It was a girl. I didn't need to be told the sex with the others as it was obvious. Just go for neutral clothes. I always kept in mind there was a chance the sonographer could be wrong and never considered the baby's sex confirmed until he or she was born and I could check it.

For newborns you only really need vests and sleepsuits, hats and mittens etc so I'd just get those in neutral colours and then you can get outfits for when they are bigger.
Although I loved keeping mine in baby grows as long as possible as they are warm and comfy. Really dislike seeing babies under 6 months wearing dresses or even worse jeans!

I did actually find out the sex during my pregnancies but first time round it made very little difference to what I bought and second time I found it helpful as I knew it was the same sex so I could sort through all the old baby and toddler clothes in the loft knowing I could use everything. But equally I happily accepted hand me down clothes from friends who had both girls and boys.

Yeah they guessed at 14+2 with my daughter (told me they think they can tell what I’m having and that they were 50% sure it was a girl, so definitely covering themselves!) and with my boy they took a guess at boy at my 12 week scan, but only because I’d already been told via bloods and wanted to make sure.

This is in the UK.

🙄 ffs of course she needs to buy stuff

Anyway go get a private scan to find out, then enjoy buying whatever you like 😊 ignore all the snide remarks here, I don’t believe for one moment they dressed their baby in all beige and sage, and if they did then how dull 🤷🏼‍♀️

I’ve heard of places not disclosing too - because of the chance of gender selective terminations. Sure, a woman can terminate for whatever reason she wants, but it’s rarely the woman pushing for these, and could make her really unsafe at the extreme end of the spectrum.

My son is nearly 1 and almost exclusively wears babygrows, lol. He does wear jeans sometimes too but only the soft, stretchy jegging style, because I can’t get anything to fit him for width except leggings, onesies or dungarees (he’s hugely tall but really skinny) - it’s hard to get brightly coloured but not floral/girlie leggings. He wears loads of girl clothes because they fit better.

Surely if someone was going to such extremes they would just pay for a blood test/private scan though? I’ve never heard that reason, but I guess it makes sense, depending on the demographics of the area.

I didn’t do that but with Dd (dc1 - who I’d been told was a girl) I was very keen on blue - especially a blue pram/ stroller- because I had it in my head it was the most restful colour. I’m fairly sure it didn’t make any difference, but you can get these ideas when pregnant.

I wasn’t very keen on second hand stuff when pregnant with her, but as soon as she was born that reluctance went away completely.

I preferred the “boys” section stuff for her, as alot of it was better quality, and warmer - she was a winter baby. Esp little soft knitted trousers, I remember.

Dc2 was a boy and was put in the few pink things I’d been given for Dd - in particular a snow suit given by my great aunt - but also her blue and neutral stuff, and second hand clothes from other people. As well as new things of course - gifts and bought by me. By that time I knew what worked.

I remember buying some second hand neutral coloured dungarees for 50 p or something from a friend of a friend for - her eldest was a boy, and she now had a girl born on the exact same day as Dd - but for some mad reason didn’t think the dungarees were suitable for a girl. They were so cute with giraffes on and one of dd’s most worn items.

Was told by a friend this was the case in Watford. Don’t know why she’d like about it.

Oh I’m not saying you are lying - I’ve just not heard it myself. I live in a far less diverse area than that myself. I wonder if there could be a cultural element (as some cultures prefer one sex over the other for various reasons)

I don’t think that’s particularly unusual though, most babies have a mixture of ‘boy/girl’ and neutral clothes.

I just get sick and tired of the same old snide remarks popping up whenever OP mentions ‘girly clothes’ or whatever - I think it’s very unlikely she meant she will dress her baby in pink and glitter forever more. Just that it would be nice to buy a few lovely things that are clearly stereotypically ‘girl’, because neutral colours can be a bit dull and frankly nobody is going to put their baby boy in a pink and purple flowery baby grow. It’s mainly for the public’s benefit anyway so they can go ‘awww what a lovely baby girl/boy’ without getting it wrong and feeling embarrassed.