To be upset at how I’ve been treated?

[UnluckyPennsatucky]

I’m a long standing member of a club that has been running for many years. Unfortunately a lot of the older members have left now due to failing health and other commitments.
What we have now is new member joining and then leaving again a few weeks later. This is an issue as I do a lot of admin for new members and it’s a waste of time and resources if they’re going to disappear after a few weeks.

So, I put it to the group that we introduce a kind of “initiation” set up so that people who are genuinely interested in the group will put the effort in before I do their admin. Group leader agreed and told me to set it up but nothing too intense or over the top.

So I came up with two stages. First one is they are asked to “design” a new character for Harry Potter.

Second is they have to walk to a nearby field with the group and fire water squirters at each other (very weak squirters, hardly any water comes out, just a bit of fun).

So new members were told this two weeks ago. Last week, still no new HP characters and refusal to walk to the field saying it was too cold/dark and they could squirt in the car park.

Long story short, group leader has now turned on me saying I’m putting off new members and I take everything too seriously and spoil it for everyone (water squirters - too serious??!! It’s literally the opposite of serious!)

I told her about the costs of pointless admin for people that don’t return and she made out that they don’t return because they don’t like me and that the admin stuff I do is unnecessary too.

I’ve since been taken off the WhatsApp group. The next group session is tomorrow night and I don’t even know if I’m welcome anymore. I’m beyond gutted. I’ve been a member for around 15 years.

Do I just apologise (even though I genuinely don’t see what I’ve done wrong!) or turn up anyway and not mention it??

I agree that club leader should have told OP ''No'' as soon as she suggested it.

It is one of the most bizzarre suggestions I've heard.

The leader probably has had had to endure dozens of suggestions from the OP

added to which, this is the leader of a book club. Not a FTSE 500 company. So being straight up and direct isn’t a pre requisite of the role. I bloody feel for this poor leader

It is a good example where ‘being kind’ and pussy footing around actually hasn’t been kind as it’s left Op blindsided when finally she’s been told No we don’t want that. They then have gone further into rude territory - no one likes you was unwarranted imo.
I feel sorry for Op who enjoys group and for volunteer Leader too. She’s probably been getting pressure to ban Op from other members. Rock & hard place.

They’re not water pistols, just little characters that spit a bit of water out

Just out of curiosity, are the people being squirted/spat at in the face? Health & safety needs to be considered in case it goes in the eyes.

I suspect most of the pressure this leader has come under is from the OP

to stop talking about anything besides the book; the badges; the admin… endlessly negative

And being given Penguin biscuits to eat.

Sadly I suspect this is spot.

FFS. It's water, not acid.

I was joking.

Would you have let someone squirt/spit water at you as an initiation test to join a book club? Would you?

No. Because it's very odd. Not because of Health & Safety concerns!

Again, I was joking.

I suppose if you wore goggles then their would no chance of anything being squirted into the eyeball.

There not their

@UnluckyPennsatucky

I think you sound completely awesome and the things you do to initiate/admin sound heaps of fun. I’d want to join your club.

Perhaps a group vote is needed?

If they vote against - I think you need to form a breakaway book club where you can keep all your fun/creative ideas - and advertise them! If I knew that was happening near me I’d join straight away. You need like-minded people. I’d be totally up for dressing up and getting squirted in a dark car park!

Can't you just charge new starters an admin fee?!

A admin fee for what? A badge and log book that nobody wants?

Squirting water pistols in a field in the dark in winter, when you've joined a club to talk about books and improve your creating writing is fun and awesome?

...ok.

@UnluckyPennsatucky did you go? How was it?

You appear to be trying too hard.

There are clubs for dressing up and getting squirted at in dark car parks. Pretty sure they're not book clubs though...

Spot the ten year old.

Go and join the Cubs.

Have you been back@UnluckyPennsatucky ?

Don't be nasty

All you're doing is showing yourself up

Agree @007DoubleOSeven