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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Child spoiling holiday

356 replies

Carrie76 · 08/02/2023 08:02

We’re currently on a ski holiday, first time for the kids. Child no 2 is refusing to go to ski school, he thinks it’s boring. The other 2 would rather ski with parents too but they’re okay to do it.

I’m currently sitting in the apt with the middle one as if he’s not doing ski school he’s not going skiing. He’s very headstrong and I don’t think he should get his way. I’m now resenting the fact that I’ve to sit here for 2.5 hrs until the lesson is over. Do I then let him ski in the afternoon??

OP posts:
RoseGoldEagle · 08/02/2023 08:03

How old are the children?

ChannelyourinnerElsa · 08/02/2023 08:04

I would, because it’s cutting off your nose to spite your face if you don’t. But there would be no evening film/hot chocolate etc.

depending on age, can you stick him in the non skiing kids club instead?!

Merlott · 08/02/2023 08:04

Age of child?

YABU to say a child is "ruining" a holiday. You're the parent, you set the expectations.

No need to sit in the apartment. Take child out to do something else. If they whinge about that/don't want to then ski school it is!

MsEmmelinePankhurst · 08/02/2023 08:04

It’s his holiday too…! What are the options for him if he doesn’t do ski school? Are you a brilliant skier who doesn’t want to be encumbered by kids whilst whizzing down black runs? Has he skiied before?

Eastereggsboxedupready · 08/02/2023 08:05

Well I hope they aren't sat on their tech..

Maray1967 · 08/02/2023 08:05

No he doesn’t get to ski this afternoon if he’s not done the lesson unless you know that it’s too basic and he’s in the wrong class. If it’s right for his level of ability he needs to do the lesson to learn properly. That was non negotiable with ours.

4thonthe4th · 08/02/2023 08:06

Sounds like a pretty shit holiday for him!

Needmorelego · 08/02/2023 08:07

So it turns out he doesn't like skiing. Oh well. Can't like everything.
Can't you find a different activity to do?
I know nothing about ski resorts but is there not a swimming pool or something. Or go to the nearest town and see what's there?
Can you just play in the snow?

DappledThings · 08/02/2023 08:07

Did he want to go skiing? I would have been terrified of that as a child and cold and miserable and very much not felt like it was a holiday in the least. Same as I would now really but I have the option to never go.

It's a bit different to a child not wanting to go out for a walk or to a museum or join in at dinner. It's a very specific activity that I don't think you can force him to do.

Buffysoldersister · 08/02/2023 08:09

How old is he? Are all the kids in the same group for ski school or is he on his own and miserable? Was the holiday and ski school discussed with the kids beforehand?

I would let him ski. But then I wouldn't take my kids on holiday and then put them in childcare...

FurAndFeathers · 08/02/2023 08:09

Would you let him miss school?
then you need to get him to ski school or ensure the alternate is worse. No sitting at home on screens

learning any new skill is tough. But perseverance is an important characteristic

dandgs · 08/02/2023 08:10

It's not clear that keeping him in the apartment is accomplishing anything - you seem to be the one suffering! Why does he have to go to ski school? Can't he go off skiing on his own? (Even very small kids do in most ski resorts.) If the issue is resenting the cost, I might impose a no-pocket-money consequence to partly offset that, but I think even then only if whether he was going to ski school was discussed in advance and he decided he wanted to. It is his holiday too. Definitely next year don't book ski school for anyone who doesn't want it. There's a lot to be said for the odd one-hour private lesson instead of tying up all that time.

Dogcafedreamer · 08/02/2023 08:10

What's the alternative as they don't like skiing? Any other activities?

4thonthe4th · 08/02/2023 08:10

Buffysoldersister · 08/02/2023 08:09

How old is he? Are all the kids in the same group for ski school or is he on his own and miserable? Was the holiday and ski school discussed with the kids beforehand?

I would let him ski. But then I wouldn't take my kids on holiday and then put them in childcare...

But then I wouldn't take my kids on holiday and then put them in childcare...

👌🏼 This!

Obviously skiing isn’t something he enjoys but has been dragged along anyway. Hope it isn’t his only “holiday”

Dragonsandcats · 08/02/2023 08:10

are Your kids in the same class or is he in his own with non English speaking kids? Sounds like it’s not his thing.

MeetandGreet · 08/02/2023 08:10

Surely skiing is a recreational activity that is optional? By all means encourage the child to keep going as they might learn to enjoy it but not sure punishing them for something they don't enjoy is fair?

dandgs · 08/02/2023 08:10

oh, first time for the kids, I missed that, sorry.

SauMore · 08/02/2023 08:11

Do the ski school run a kids club or crèche?. One of mine hated ski school on one holiday so we insisted she stay in kids club instead so the rest of us could go to ski school.
I think you possibly have a child that doesn't like skiing but if you're in France some of the ski schools take it all very seriously and forget to make sure the kids have fun!

PatriciaHolm · 08/02/2023 08:11

Ours hated ski school aged 5/6 as every else was French, as was the instructor.

Private lessons - which for 2 wasn't much more - was the answer; they loved that.

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 08/02/2023 08:11

Ski school for beginners in a group can be really dull. Ages in queues waiting for 83959295 people do two turns. Add February skiing which is pretty cold to the mix…. I don’t blame him. Probably miserable

ArseMenagerie · 08/02/2023 08:11

Ski school isn’t childcare - it’s to teach them to ski and most kids would prefer to be with parents until they get there and then they love it. After ski school (only 2 hours or so) you can ski as a family.

I would let him ski this afternoon but if no ski school tomorrow then no skiing again full stop … and make this afternoon super fun!

KangarooKenny · 08/02/2023 08:11

It’s a holiday, let him do what he wants.

MeMyCatsAndMyBooks · 08/02/2023 08:12

I would in the afternoon, just because you enjoy it doesn't mean your dc will.
Maybe a more appropriate family hoilday in future and keep skiiing for you and DH?

rookiemere · 08/02/2023 08:12

We need an age.

Ifailed · 08/02/2023 08:13

How old are the children?
As it's term-time, presumably under 5 or over 16.