Child spoiling holiday

[Carrie76]

We’re currently on a ski holiday, first time for the kids. Child no 2 is refusing to go to ski school, he thinks it’s boring. The other 2 would rather ski with parents too but they’re okay to do it.

I’m currently sitting in the apt with the middle one as if he’s not doing ski school he’s not going skiing. He’s very headstrong and I don’t think he should get his way. I’m now resenting the fact that I’ve to sit here for 2.5 hrs until the lesson is over. Do I then let him ski in the afternoon??

Definitely no skiing this afternoon 🤷‍♀️

The rule is ski school in the morning and fun skiing in the afternoon, you cant have one without the other.

Dear 10-year-old! Skiing is awesome. You are so lucky to be skiing – it is the best holiday. I have two kids and they have done lots of ski schools with ESF. Because of this they are really really good and they are so fast that I can’t keep up. I can ski all the black runs and all the difficult runs, but I still can’t keep up with them! When you go up a lift look at the really good skiers coming down and they ski in a cool turns. Only the instructors can teach you that. It sounds like mum only does green runs so maybe she could do lessons too as well sometimes or she will be left behind. If you get skiing now for the next few days and go to ski school then next year you will be skiing all the red runs really easily. So I suggest you go to ski school and listen very carefully and watch everybody on the lift and watch the instructor and you will become an awesome skier!! Sometimes you have to slow down before you can speed up again because you need the right shape of turn to be able to ski moguls and very steep slopes. My kids didn’t always want to go to ski school when they were younger, but now they always want to go because they know they will have so much more skiing and much much faster because it is safer to do this with an instructor. Instructors take them to cooler places! Go and put your coat on!! You might be able to catch up with your class and mum could have a word to see if you can move up. Or if it is getting late then pop to the ESF office and get a one hour lesson at lunchtime to put you in the right class tomorrow. When my son was six, he moved up a class from his brother! Most importantly enjoy your holiday!

My DS was in ski school from the age of 4 till around 11-12. He's now a phenomenal skiier who can go really fast but in control. Kids who bomb it down out of control terrify me on the slopes. I'd insist on ski school but would talk to the instructor about moving him up as some kids do progress faster than others. If probably let him out this afternoon on the proviso he goes back to ski school tomorrow.

Also .. what @sleighbob said!

It's the same as swimming in this household- you don't go on in the water and you don't go on the piste without lessons to get you to an adequate level of safety.

No lessons - no fun mucking about in water or in the snow.

Stick to your guns - but I agree it makes it a non-relaxing holiday.

Oh and if the kid is genuinely capable of going up a class I’d expect the instructor to have already said something and done it tbh. My DD got moved up midweek at Christmas, last year my niece/nephew (not the nephew that nearly killed himself!) were moved up whilst another niece was moved down as she couldn’t keep up.

He sounds like a total total pain.
At 10, I’d leave him in the apartment for the morning and go off skiing. I’m sure one boring morning inside will be more than enough to get him going back to ski school. Ski school: it’s a funny one..I wasn’t mad keen on it, lots of being shouted at in French, cold ski lifts and other weird children BUT..it’s almost a necessity/rite of passage as a child if you are part of a skiing family! And now skiing is the best week of the year for me! And my children go off to ski school. They love it though , apparently.

Get the instructor to have a talk with him......I can guarantee you someone who's professional in a sport he enjoys will have far more impact than your nagging. Ask him to make it clear he.wont be progressing to any decent.slopes if he doesn't learn how to be safe first. Few horror stories thrown in for good measure will do the trick.

How about you get him a 1-2-1 instructor? I do agree that he needs to know that no instructor = no skiing, even in the afternoon. Return his ski equipment to the hire shop to show you're serious.

We have been on 3 ski holidays and we still all use ski school. It was non negotiable for the children (teens)

He’s very headstrong and I don’t think he should get his way

So who exactly is very headstrong here?

@sleighbob lovely post.

@rookiemere is there a DH. There's no mention of a DH, is there?

I wouldn't have let him miss ski school to be honest (unless ill). I think that children have to understand that the price to pay for skiing (other than the actual extortionate price) is the time taken to learn to do it really well. Maybe he's making faster progress than the other children in his group but the instructor should definitely be able to accommodate that - his technique will not be anywhere near adequate after 3 lessons so there will be plenty to work on.
I wouldn't let him ski this afternoon unless he understands that ski school is a requirement for the rest of the week and he can't be a brat about it. Mine started ski school age 5 and were still doing it at 14 because they could go faster in ski school than with us and we're taken on more exciting slopes etc. They are amazing skiers. He doesn't understand the advantages of learning to do it really well and he needs that explaining to him very quickly!

I agree with those saying he’s being an utter brat.

If he wants to ski he needs to learn to ski safely. This is what a skiing holiday involves. I agrée private lessons for the family might have worked but the decision has been made now, and it’s been discussed at the appropriate time - when booking the holiday.

What help has your DH/P been in all of this OP?

You're on holiday so if you want to , you should ski too. Take him out this afternoon but make sure it's more boring than ski school. He stays with you, goes at your pace etc.

He’s not a brat – he just doesn’t know the unknown & wants to be able to ski instantly. Perfectly normal! Ask him the lady on the chat wants to know if he has read my letter and has he got his coat on yet?

Is this a holiday or an expensive trip to learn how to ski? You need to set your priorities on what you get out of your holidays fairly on yourself and your dc. This will eternally be remembered as the shite time you made your kid spend the holiday at ‘ski school’.
If you was on a regular shmegular holiday in Benidorm would you make them do swimming or macrame lessons? I doubt it.

Couldnt you go sledging or whatever you do on snowy holidays with the DC?

Why sit indoors? A 2 hour hike will set the child up for the day.
If he doesn’t like skiing maybe he’ll like mountain walking.

It posted too soon.
Maybe they’ll like walking, photographing skiers, snow, birds etc.. Is there skating?

He sounds like he’s being a total brat. I was expecting you to say he’s 4 or 5, not 10! I would March him to the bloody ski school. And failing that I’d put him in some other sort of crèche or kids club. I certainly wouldn’t be taking him skiing in the afternoon.

This. My daughter is very sporty and having never skied before, found beginners lessons incredibly dull, as she took to skiing super quickly. She actually sneaked into a more advanced group (she was on a ski holiday with school) and was going down red slopes, even though this was her first time. I think you need to ask for your son to join a more advanced group and not punish him for being sporty.

Justmeandthedog1. 10 year old child loves skiing, he wants to ski just not have the lessons at ski school

Don’t sit in the appartement. take him out now with you to the green slopes at your pace. Then after a morning of that give him the choice - ski with you at your pace or with his siblings in the lesson.
also the options of private lessons and / or moving him up a group are worth exploring, as is getting ski teacher to talk to him.

I think you need to call his bluff and just let him crack on. Sometimes the best way kids learn is through their mistakes. I remember when I was about 7 I stuck my finger through the guard on the electric fire to touch the heating element. I learnt very quickly and painfully not to do something so blatantly stupid. It's the same for your child, insist he wears all the safety gear and a helmet but just let him ski if he's so convinced he knows it all. A few near-misses and he'll realise his capabilities might need some fine-tuning.

I wouldn't let him ski at all. He needs to attend the class to have the privilege of skiing. No ski school then no skiing. Also, no devices or screen time. Leave him reading. I'd also be tempted to add actual school work.

He needs to go to ski school and he's acting like a brat. It's about learning control and safety - Tweenie boys who have just been let loose on slopes are a menace. They need to understand the rules and the etiquette - 3 lessons wont have given him that.

If he goes to ski school he can do something more fast and exciting in the afternoon with your DP (I assume he can ski!). If not then he's spending the afternoon with you going down the nursery slopes as he's not earned the right to do anything else.

You are the parent, do not put up with this!