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AIBU?

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Original poster

Deliveroo Driver knocked at my door asking for money.

185 replies

avamiah · 05/02/2023 20:50

A couple of hours ago there was a knock at my front door so as it’s already dark by then I asked who it was and he said your delivery driver so I opened it as I was expecting a Amazon delivery and I was shocked to see a Deliveroo driver.I recognised him as a driver who has delivered to me on numerous occasions.He said he been waiting for a order from me but none had come and could I help him out with any spare change.
I was speechless to say the least and said No and shut the door and have been in shock for the last few hours thinking did that just happen.
To say it’s freaked me out is a understatement and I would appreciate any advice.
Thank You

OP posts:
Grrrrdarling · 06/02/2023 18:55

I’m reading the comments now & absolutely shocked how many would just accept this sort of thing as ‘normal’ behaviour.
As a minimum it is a breach of data protection as the data the deliveroo driver gets for deliveries is not for personal use!
More extreme how many single women is he keeping data from & tracking order routine of 😬

HashtagShitShop · 06/02/2023 18:56

I would find this awkward and intimidating too, he'd also go away with nothing from here. I once stopped using a particular takeaway because their driver was over friendly in a really creepy undressing with his eyes as he looked at you sort of way. Occasionally he'd slip a question in to see if anyone else wa sin or if there was a man on the scene. He got nowhere too.

Once also reported a dpd driver who delivered a parcel as he got all pushy and forceful on my next door neighbour and then came here and tried to push for her private info, her number and if she was single etc.

Things like this make me consider using a male form of my name on my accounts for things that come often as though there's a man in the house (not for bills and important things obv)

HashtagShitShop · 06/02/2023 18:57

SandraCumin · 06/02/2023 18:51

Couldn’t you have used a bit of empathy and thrown the poor fella a few pounds? It’s almost impossible to live in a hellhole country like this as an ethnic minority and people with your callous attitude don’t make it any easier.

And encourage him to return and ask again? Or ask others or get more forceful as "it's not enough" etc? Don't be daft.

BadNomad · 06/02/2023 18:58

SandraCumin · 06/02/2023 18:51

Couldn’t you have used a bit of empathy and thrown the poor fella a few pounds? It’s almost impossible to live in a hellhole country like this as an ethnic minority and people with your callous attitude don’t make it any easier.

Eh? It says more about you that you assume a man begging for money must be an "ethnic minority".

SandraCumin · 06/02/2023 19:00

BadNomad · 06/02/2023 18:58

Eh? It says more about you that you assume a man begging for money must be an "ethnic minority".

Show quote history

Not at all, all my delivery drivers are ethnic minorities because they are the only people willing to do the hard jobs in this country. I actually have a lot of respect for these individuals.

maria57 · 06/02/2023 19:02

I feel sorry for this man. He comes across as quite desperate. Deliveroo Drivers are paid pittance for what they do. I would imagine you have come across as quite kind and approachable and this has been a desperate time for him so he has not thought things through.
I can imagine it has been quite startling for you but people are struggling so much at the moment they are doing things they would never do normally...its very very sad.

BadNomad · 06/02/2023 19:09

SandraCumin · 06/02/2023 19:00

Not at all, all my delivery drivers are ethnic minorities because they are the only people willing to do the hard jobs in this country. I actually have a lot of respect for these individuals.

Show quote history

You're being very patronising. All sorts of people do delivery driving, mainly because it's an easy and convenient job to get. It has nothing to do with ethnicity.

LoisLane66 · 06/02/2023 19:21

There's feeling sorry for someone who may be struggling and then there's feeling sorry to the point of not being careful for your own safety.
You need to get a chain on your front door and I hope you've already reported it to to the police and Deliveroo.
If you are the only person who answers the door when a food order is delivered by that company, I would be very very careful indeed.
He may think, by the contents of the order and the fact that it's always you who opens the door, that you don't have an adult male living with you.
These individuals are not DBS checked. They could have prison records for all you know.
There's a first time for every action. Don't be a victim. Take care.

Hmm1234 · 06/02/2023 19:26

This is so sad and bizarre he’s been waiting for you to order and counting on whatever commission the delivery drivers make. Do you have cameras installed send Deliveroo an email

Mylittlesandwich · 06/02/2023 20:05

@SandraCumin I did delivery driving and I am very white. My colleagues were also mostly white. Delivery driving truly brings people in from all walks. Some making a bit of extra cash for luxuries and people like me needing to make ends meet.

mustgetoffmn · 06/02/2023 20:31

avamiah · 05/02/2023 20:59

@WiddlinDiddlin ,
yes I always give the drivers a cash tip but only a couple of pounds and the maximum £5 but that was over the Christmas period .

Obviously not OK but I’m getting a bit of a sad vibe here. Not your problem but he sounds desperate. Or a bit dumb

Mollymoostoo · 06/02/2023 21:18

The OP is not a customer of the delivery driver. She is a customer of the takeaway who is the customer of deliveroo. This is a subcontracted agreement so she can get a takeaway. He should not have knocked on her door asking for money and should be reported, this is not okay no matter what the circumstances and I'm sure would be against his own employment terms.
Other jobs are available, times are tough but unsolicited calls asking for money are not okay.

Mollymoostoo · 06/02/2023 21:22

BadNomad · 06/02/2023 18:58

Eh? It says more about you that you assume a man begging for money must be an "ethnic minority".

Show quote history

Exactly. I am from an ethnic minority and don't go knocking on doors asking for cash. How patronising and what an assumption to make. @SandraCumin .

AuntMarch · 06/02/2023 23:52

Toomuchtrouble4me · 06/02/2023 17:55

It is sad - I don’t think I’d report him - the last thing he needs is to lose his job and also…he knows where you live! I would just leave it and if he tries again then threaten to report.

Losing his job is exactly what should happen if he is abusing his access to people's personal data in order to harass them for money.

SlipSlidinAway · 07/02/2023 00:03

You were clear and firm with him op so hopefully he's not going to try asking again.

I really wouldn't report him to Deliveroo or the police as others have suggested because, if he hasn't tried it with anyone else he'll know it was you who reported him. I wouldn't want to risk any sort of reprisal. Obviously if he tries again then you'll have to report.

Gabby8 · 07/02/2023 10:12

This sounds like a very sad desperate situation but he completely overstepped and it is a GDPR breach. At the end of the day you can’t know whether it’s genuine or sinister but personally I would report to police and see what they say, you could always frame it as you were concerned for his welfare, which you are. The thing is if you gave money he would likely comeback another time and another - I personally would not want to see someone that cold called asking for cash on my doorstep again. It’s creepy.

fancydressjess · 07/02/2023 11:07

"Losing his job is exactly what should happen if he is abusing his access to people's personal data in order to harass them for money."

THIS
I have zero tolerance now.
The thing is, I've experienced and observed time and time again where people have been given the benefit of the doubt, we want to be kind, we have been trained to not make a fuss, to put others feelings first...
But eventually I learnt to always report these transgressions and/or share through the grapevine depending on the situation... Without huge judgement... Just in case there is a pattern of behaviour... And in my experience there usually is...
To me this is like the tip of the "me too" iceberg where silence allows so much harm to continue....
That's my observation, and in no way a judgement against the individual at your door.

fancydressjess · 07/02/2023 11:10

It's the entitlement that concerns me... Because he hadn't got an order from you he'd just turn up anyway.

NOPE. NOPE. NOPE.
If he thinks that's fair enough then wtf else might he think is fair enough?!

MinnieGirl · 07/02/2023 11:11

I showed my husband this post….
Straight away he said Police! And report to Deliveroo….
Not acceptable behaviour at all… I would feel very vulnerable and would certainly not want him delivering my food again.

RealeyesRealizeReallies · 07/02/2023 11:16

Very inappropriate of him to do that but, in this climate, hardly surprising.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

And, unless you felt, threatened, your reaction is OTT.

RealeyesRealizeReallies · 07/02/2023 11:22

I’m reading the comments now & absolutely shocked how many would just accept this sort of thing as ‘normal’ behaviour.

Nobody is accepting thus behaviour as normal. However, as a consequence of being under this shitty government, people are struggling more than they should be, which is now becoming the norm..

RealeyesRealizeReallies · 07/02/2023 11:23

this*

Logburnerperils · 07/02/2023 11:30

Only on this website would anyone think this is even remotely acceptable. I see why I stay for the entertainment. OP what he did was bang out of order so either report him or use a different company in the future.
I am surprised you haven't been told off for being able to afford take away in this current climate.

maddening · 07/02/2023 11:45

EscapeRoomToTheSun · 05/02/2023 21:42

I think it's pretty grim that you think someone who is obviously in desperate circumstance is somehow more likely to be a danger to women. Why do you assume that? Does crushing poverty cause misogyny?

Show quote history

It is a risk assessment though not a judgement on all people in poverty.

I would risk assess someone that was prepared to break social norms to beg door to door, specifically targeting women that they know to tip when receiving a delivery as an increased risk of being unhinged or being prepared to go beyond just knocking at doors compared to someone who doesn't.

No risk assessment can be perfect, it is always a guess, but a guess based on consideration of a number of elements taking in to account facts and, if possible, quantifiable factors. The op can only go on what she sees and knows.

GrannyWeatherwaxsHatpin · 07/02/2023 12:04

"Losing his job is exactly what should happen if he is abusing his access to people's personal data in order to harass them for money."

Absolutely. I've "been kind" in the past, I've helped people out when I'm conscious of my relative advantages in life, financial or otherwise. And you know what? There are people who just keep taking. Not only will they take what you've offered but they'll hassle you for what you didn't offer, as well. You're seen as a soft touch, the cash cow they can carry on milking. I still help people that I feel to be genuine but I have a pretty good idea who is just on the take nowadays and I'm very quick and firm with my boundaries.

If this driver is desperate then there are other avenues for help: foodbanks, local charities etc. It is absolutely not acceptable to be knocking on doors asking for money. And if this escalated and some woman (because it's ALWAYS women who get targeted) then you can guarantee all the "Aww hun, why can't you just give him a few pounds" types on here would be crying out as to why his victim should have protected herself.