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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Teenage boys ruined my carpets - should I contact their parents?

806 replies

thecranberries · 21/01/2023 10:40

My 16 yr old DC had a birthday party last night. About 40 teenagers attending. Fine. My DC is responsible as are her friends. I went out, obviously, and came back at 11.30pm.

I found a bunch of girls mopping my wooden floor and stone kitchen floor, two girls picking up clumps of mud, one girl vacuuming up mud (ruined my Dyson as mud was wet) and various other girls using towels to wipe down what they could.

My DC told me what boys had done: they'd gone into the garden beyond the decking, despite being told repeatedly not to do so. They went into my garden shed and took out garden spade, fork and rake and just dumped them into garden, leaving shed door open. They ruined my lawn. And they'd repeatedly gone in and out - they all wear those clumpy trainers - and just spread the mud. (It's been very wet recently).

After being told many times not to do so, she finally told all the boys to leave, and as they were doing so, some attempted to filch things from my home, so DC and a few other girls checked the boy's pockets before ejecting them.

All the girls responsible, well behaved, and considerate. All the boys - led by one especially - irresponsible, disrespectful, boarish, and the lead boy - simply kept laughing when asked to behave responsibly and not rile up the others.

So, AIBU to call the parents of the lead boy and tell them exactly what their DS is like? I have to pay for my carpets and rugs to be cleaned and spend my day deep cleaning my home from debris I had not factored in rather than just the normal tidy up.

I know my DC will be extremely embarrassed at my actions, ie calling the parents of lead boy - but at the same time, I am left with an unexpected bill and extra work at a particularly time-poor moment in my week.

Just for record, all boys come from 'nice' families, and go to very good state and private schools.

WWYD?

OP posts:
Chloe800 · 29/01/2023 03:50

You sound and angry person, not helpful at all really

Cuppasoupmonster · 29/01/2023 08:43

What’s wrong with being angry? Or is it only a remit of the men?

TheaBrandt · 29/01/2023 09:44

Chloe if a load of lads stamped mud through your house and mucked about in the garden after being told not to would you smile indulgently? If so you are either a saint a weirdo or a liar because pretty much every normal woman would be bloody angry!

WendyAndClyde · 29/01/2023 09:50

Cuppasoupmonster · 29/01/2023 08:43

What’s wrong with being angry? Or is it only a remit of the men?

That's right. Women must be kind. And smile.

Cuppasoupmonster · 29/01/2023 10:01

I get very fed up of the U r sO AnGRY responses on here. Firstly what’s wrong with a woman being angry? Why is it seen as something only an inherently unreasonable woman would feel? It’s supposed to be some kind of terminatory remark on here but it’s just ridiculous and sexist.

MissWings · 29/01/2023 12:01

Never be angry. Never shout or raise your voice at anyone. Always be good. Well fuck that shit, it’s not something I aspire too. Okay going around like a mental case who can’t regulate themselves isn’t cool either but let’s stop shaming women for sometimes being angry.

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