Inviting others on a trip we paid for?

[Wantsummerback]

Please tell me your thoughts on this, me and DH are so wound up about it. We have booked a trip for parents in law and they are inviting other people at our expense. I appreciate we have gifted it them and they can do what they want with it.

but it just feels such a slap in the face! We found such a lovely place for them to relax and now they aren’t even going together.

I think you really want your parents-in-law to enjoy solely the place and other things you prepared for them. Moreover, since it's not the 1st time that person has sponged a free trip, whatever the additional costs it will be at your PIL's expense. I hope they were invited by your PIL though instead of that certain person asked to join.

Never mind the current problem - check the conditions with the owner of the log cabin and with the chef, as suggested, and let it go. Don't waste time trying to change PIL or SIL - they are too enmeshed for anything to be done unless they choose to change.

SIL accuses you of what was it? Snaking on her by going away without her?! Think what she will be like when PIL die! Someone described what her aunt did to her parents. She will end up doing that to you.

It's DH you need to focus on. You and he need to establish boundaries wrt SIL before PIL die, and you need marriage counselling or other outside help to do this. Someone else said her DH only learned to have her back when she threatened to separate. Your DH has to learn that you and the kids come first - she admits she doesn't even like the kids. She is a great big cuckoo in your nest and like a cuckoo she will destroy your family unless you get professional help.

Green Fritillary well said and I agree.

Any updates, OP?