Page 9 | To think that a man standing outside a school in girls uniform is not OK?

HermioneKipper · 20/01/2023 10:10

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dawngreen · 20/01/2023 10:10

Fetish or trans thing I would have thought they would remove him for his own safety at least. It opens the way for any perv to dress the same.

Farmageddon · 20/01/2023 10:11

And for people who think it's just 'fashion choices' - think again. There is a very good reason he is dressed as a 'schoolgirl' rather than just in a school uniform, complete with a wig.

Transvestic fetishism is the derivation of sexual arousal from cross-dressing or dressing in clothes of the opposite sex.

RitasR · 20/01/2023 10:11

SamphiretheTervosaurReturneth · 20/01/2023 10:03

What is it you fear? I'm presuming this is around children's safety so what do you think he's going to do?

Fear? Let's start with the mental health, fear, anxiety, discomfort of the young kids involved. He is a grown man wearing a school girls uniform deliberately placing himself in close proximity to children.

What do I think he is going to do? Precisely what he IS doing. Making countless kids, and parents, uncomfortable. I wouldn't assume his behaviour will escalate, but it probably will, once he become acclimatised to doing what he is currently doing (like the report that he was trying to climb the school fence again yesterday)

What do you want/expect the Police to do? Arrest him, detain him? What offence?

If he has mental health issues and capacity then any kind of order barring him from being within X distance of a school. As happens with many other people for very many offences or potential offences.

If he has no capacity then a better community care option. But we know how likely that is. Especially when so many place his freedom of expression above the safety and comfort of others.

Would it make a difference if he was younger or didn't wear the uniform (but other teen clothes)?

No. Because a man with no kids loitering outside school gates is usually taken to be there with ill intent. This man is different because.... he wears a girl's school uniform and that somehow makes it all absolutely fine and dandy.

Double standards for trans identifying men is not acceptable - no mater what other mental health issues it is speculated they may have.

Perfectly put.

Fuck the 'what do you fear' bullshit. IMO it's typical male unable to empathise with the feelings and experiences of anyone else but him.

There is no need to fear or anticipate what he may do in the future. This calculating, gaslighting, manipulating, trolling man and his indecent and vexatious actions cause trauma and distress to school children and cause worry for them and their families now. What he is doing is unacceptable and I hope he will be moved along by police sooner than later.

lemmein · 20/01/2023 10:12

Would it be fair to prosecute a teenager from a rough estate who was loitering outside a shop because they're of similar age to other teenagers who've loitered outside the shop in the past and gone on to smash the windows?

No, but the police can and do move them on for loitering. In an area close to me the police have issued a dispersal order for youths gathering in certain areas, and can arrest them if they return within 24 hours of a warning. They don't need to have committed any other crime.

knittingaddict · 20/01/2023 10:14

Tiny2018 · 20/01/2023 08:58

Are we sure this man has no learning difficulties? I only ask as most people who pose a threat to society would make more of an effort to hide their behaviour if it might look dodgy.

I worked in a home for people with learning difficulties a few years and similar stuff could be found in some of their histories. This of course is not meant to suggest that everybody with learning difficulties is a risk, nothing could be further from the truth, but your reference to this man instantly made me think of one of the men in that home.

You obviously haven't noticed how emboldened men like this have become. Authorities are too scared to challenge them - Trans don't ya know. They think they are untouchable.

Personality disorder maybe. Learning difficulty? I highly doubt it.

Also that is highly offensive to people with learning difficulties. Why on earth would you think they would act like this?

snowlolo · 20/01/2023 10:15

Nocaloriesinchocolate · 20/01/2023 08:55

Outrageous, I agree. Is there not some sort of rule about only pupils being allowed to wear their school uniform and only in school, to and from and on school business? If not, there perhaps should be

I see what you're saying but really how could they have a rule on this?

Obviously this is creepy and the police should intervene, I'm not disputing that.

But the school can't exactly enforce 'no one can wear our uniform except our pupils' can they? What would you expect them to do? Haul him in and strip him? (he'd probably like that!)

Lovelysausagedogscrumpy · 20/01/2023 10:15

JudgeRudy · 20/01/2023 10:02

I agree with @Dotjones . I would hate the idea of Thought Police! I'm already uneasy with abuse of the stop and search powers etc

Show quote history

Do you hate the idea of the ‘thought police’ more than the idea of a man getting off by displaying his ‘fetish’ in public, and to schoolchildren, while a small group of very vocal people tryto tell the rest of us we should try to #bekind and normalise this behaviour. Do you think the police would have any trouble dealing with him if he was dressed as a police officer in public ?

lovescats3 · 20/01/2023 10:15

Are you sure that the police have been informed that he's outside the school?

Emotionalsupportviper · 20/01/2023 10:16

crinklemum2 · 20/01/2023 08:35

Name changed as this is very local and he was seen wearing my DD's school uniform.

A local school uniform shop shared images to reassure parents they would not be selling him any items. Essex police say he poses no risk and people should stop sharing the photos. He looks to be late 50s/early 60s.

He's been seen around schools - both primary and secondary - dressed as a school girl (in their uniform). I am fucking outraged that the police don't seem to think that's an issue. God forbid we offend men or shame their fetishes.

AIBU that this must be an antisocial behaviour at the very least?

I agree - this is very disturbing.

I wonder - if this man were not wearing school uniform, but was just an average bloke, who had no cause to be hanging around the school (ie no child/grandchild to drop off or collect) would the police be taking this cavalier attitude? I'll bet they wouldn't!

It appears they're so afraid of offending "trans" they seem to be deliberately turning a blind eye to behaviour which, even if it isn't dangerous, is sordid and unpleasant.

seineingefrohrenerpimmel · 20/01/2023 10:16

What the hell has happened in the last 15 years since I left teaching (and the UK)?
People loitering outside schools were always considered to be a security risk. We had several incidents of men loitering. Staff members always kept an eye out for things like that and went out and asked people to move on. In one school I worked in we had a couple of burly male staff members and they only had to leave the building and start approaching the loiterer and the loiterer would scarper. Usually after being asked to move on several times the person would stop.
In another primary school I worked at we had bother with someone constantly trying to approach children at playtime (the playground was fenced in but next to the pavement). In that case police had to be called on at least 3 occasions as the man wouldn't move on when asked by staff. And the police came out every time and didn't make light of it.
None of the men were dressed in school uniform and they were still considered to be a public nuisance and a potential risk to the children.

It's ludicrous that this man is allowed to hang around schools, dressed in a school uniform and nothing is being done about it.
Or are the police scared they will be labelled as transphobic because he's identifying as a school girl?
It's a disgrace.

Nocutenamesleft · 20/01/2023 10:17

crinklemum2 · 20/01/2023 08:35

Name changed as this is very local and he was seen wearing my DD's school uniform.

A local school uniform shop shared images to reassure parents they would not be selling him any items. Essex police say he poses no risk and people should stop sharing the photos. He looks to be late 50s/early 60s.

He's been seen around schools - both primary and secondary - dressed as a school girl (in their uniform). I am fucking outraged that the police don't seem to think that's an issue. God forbid we offend men or shame their fetishes.

AIBU that this must be an antisocial behaviour at the very least?

Could he be a dad who is trying to make his daughter laugh?!? Like why have you gone straight for sexual perv and fetish?!?

StephanieSuperpowers · 20/01/2023 10:17

What is it you fear? I'm presuming this is around children's safety so what do you think he's going to do?

This guy has probably been fantasising about this stuff for years and has escalated to carrying out some part of it in public. I don't know how this will escalate further, but indecent exposure is clearly somewhere it could go. For clarity, cool kids, this would be a bad thing.

What do you want/expect the Police to do? Arrest him, detain him? What offence?

Move him on. Tell the schools that if he's hanging around outside, to call and he'll be moved on. Every time, as often as necessary.

Would it make a difference if he was younger or didn't wear the uniform (but other teen clothes)?

Nope. Nobody should be skulking around a school, but especially someone in what is clearly a fetish outfit for them.

Come on, this is stuff is obvious. Pretending you don't know or understand the problem makes you look idiotic.

lovescats3 · 20/01/2023 10:18

Isn't this classed as loitering with intent?

Holdmycoat · 20/01/2023 10:18

'In a post on Facebook, a spokesman for the business said it had not sold him the Belfairs uniform but added: “He was in store this week purchasing a grey box pleat skirt that he said was for his granddaughter, he is now banned from the shop."

This man knows exactly what he is doing, he has already lied about who the uniform is for, meaning he will have lied about his intentions to the police during their 'little chat.' He knows he is doing wrong and I don't believe there isn't more the police can do. As further above they've done more shifting homeless people, and banning social media accounts.

HermioneWeasley · 20/01/2023 10:19

NotBadConsidering · 20/01/2023 09:50

Surely the answer is to educate the children that people are different, but to recognise eg signs of grooming

This is how I would educate children on this:

There are some people who are different. They are blind to the abusers that walk amongst us. They are often groomed themselves, but some of them are stupid fucks who don’t understand safeguarding. There are people, like posters on MN, adults in your life, Police (especially the Met, Gwent, Leeds, Notts) all of whom will try and convince you that creeps aren’t actually creeps, men aren’t abusers, and that you’re not a victim. Fuck all of them. Look after yourselves and each other. Seek out the adults in your lives who see things for what they really are. These will usually be cranky middle-aged women who don’t give a fuck about saving men’s feelings anymore. Talk to them. Don’t trust anyone else, stand up for yourself and don’t be scared of the “bigot” label which is just a tool to silence concerns.

That’s how I would use this to “educate” children.

This. Every word of it.

I am often reminded of Janice Turner talking about Jimmy Saville. She did a lot of research into how he operated and got away with it and one of her findings was the only people who stood up to him were middle aged women - he bought off the doctors and porters, he bullied the younger nurses but the miserable hatchet faced matrons were the only ones to bar his way and when they were in charge their patients were protected.

HRTQueen · 20/01/2023 10:19

According to news reports the police have spoke to to the man involved and asked people not to share pictures of him on social media

the police have stated according to reports that this man is ‘not a risk’

what absolute bollocks

RichardOsmansXraySpecs · 20/01/2023 10:19

lovescats3 · 20/01/2023 10:15

Are you sure that the police have been informed that he's outside the school?

An Essex Police spokesman said: “We are aware of reports of a person dressed in an inappropriate outfit in the vicinity of a school in Leigh.

Oh they fucking know 😡

PlusLaMeme · 20/01/2023 10:19

Could he be a dad who is trying to make his daughter laugh?!? Like why have you gone straight for sexual perv and fetish?!?

Seriously? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

lemmein · 20/01/2023 10:19

What are people so afraid of these days? Something underhand exists in the echelons of our society and I for one can’t wait for it to be exposed.

This. There's a very sinister vibe to it all.

lovescats3 · 20/01/2023 10:21

You and other parents bombard the school with phone calls and emails complaining,same for governor's, council and local MP

MrsSkylerWhite · 20/01/2023 10:21

Annoyingwurringnoise · Today 08:46
One of these men whose hard drive needs to be looked at“

This, absolutely. On what basis though, I’m not sure?
Any police officers here? Doesn’t there have to be a good, legal reason and a process before someone’s hard drive is taken? Not sure that being a weirdo and gut feeling would stand?

lovescats3 · 20/01/2023 10:22

How do the police know he's not a risk - so they gave a crystal ball ?

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 20/01/2023 10:22

lovescats3 · 20/01/2023 10:21

You and other parents bombard the school with phone calls and emails complaining,same for governor's, council and local MP

Police, council, MP surely?

the school can’t do anything about someone not on school grounds

lovescats3 · 20/01/2023 10:22

Was meant to be do and have