To think that a man standing outside a school in girls uniform is not OK?

[crinklemum2]

Name changed as this is very local and he was seen wearing my DD's school uniform.

A local school uniform shop shared images to reassure parents they would not be selling him any items. Essex police say he poses no risk and people should stop sharing the photos. He looks to be late 50s/early 60s.

He's been seen around schools - both primary and secondary - dressed as a school girl (in their uniform). I am fucking outraged that the police don't seem to think that's an issue. God forbid we offend men or shame their fetishes.

AIBU that this must be an antisocial behaviour at the very least?

Shhhh naunet stop it, you’re spoiling it for them!

I'm amazed none of the local dads have "moved him on" themselves yet. Hell, at my old rather rough secondary some of the Year 10 or 11 lads would have tried their luck by now!

Yes it was.

The comparison to actual racism and homophobia is grossly trivialising and minimising. The sufferings of black people and gay people aren't an entitlement for co-opting every time someone wants to make a stupid point on the internet.

Depends if they're silly enough to do it with their faces visible.

@Onnabugeisha You have a surprising amount of faith in the police given recent prominent news stories about the failings of their vetting policies and toxic misogynistic culture.

I did actually point out upthread somewhere that his family had been having problems trying to access mental health services for him. And I’m not suggesting that the possibility of MH problems are either ridiculous or groundless. I’m saying that the possibility of someone with MH problems doing what he’s doing doesn’t make it any better, or safer for the children, or more acceptable to the parents who are being hung out to dry because no one seems to want to factor in their childrens’ safety if it somehow compromises this man’s ‘rights’.

Wow, you have a go at me for saying “touched in the head” as perpetuating stigma against the mentally unwell, and then start ranting about only a
“predatory, intimidatory, sexually aberrant person with a fetish and a predilection for children” would behave this way.

Whoof. That’s some heavy stigma right there, you’re taking what could be (and evidence to date suggests) simply bizarre behaviour by a mentally unwell person and ascribing to it the worst sort of motives, intent and using extremely derogatory language.

Quite. They've done nothing to deserve any trust in this respect.

I don't either.

Do you think everyone with MH issues is dangerous to children? How do you know safety hasn’t been factored in by the police?

Why are people so eager to assume he is a “pervert” getting “sexual arousal” when the police have already checked him out for that and said that he isn’t any such type of person? Are we wrong for thinking about the other possibilities since the police have ruled out the one you think it is?

The police also told me my DDs abusive boyfriend was 'harmless' and had been sent to prison for having sex with his underage girlfriend when 'he wasn't much older himself'

What they failed to say is the same man had been accused on 8 separate occasions of rape - went to court for 2, admitted sex but with consent, got convicted for having sex with an minor - cleared of rape. He then went on to rape my DD and chase her with a knife.

I wouldn't trust the police on this.

God thats absolutely awful. And it’s fine you don’t want to trust the police due to the trauma and betrayal of other police officers, but it’s also fine that others are ok with trusting police who are not the same police that let you down so badly.

@DesertIslandCondiment

AngelsWithSilverWings
@2023pending well clearly it's his family who are the ones trying to get the help because I imagine he doesn't have the capacity to do it himself.
He has the capacity to go uniform shopping and lie it's for his

He possibly doesn't have the capacity to realise what he is doing is deeply disturbing to people and children or that he is putting himself in danger and may not have the capacity to get the help he needs. Which is why his family are trying to do this for him. Mental illness can't be simplified in the way you have.

Well I have Geisha. your right it's not stupidity. It's superiority of knowing that they technically haven't done anything illegal so are free to do what the hell they like. Knowing full well the effect they are having in those subjected to their stare.

And my very own paedophile was a very openly letch and stare bloke himself.

Happy New year by the way.

Yes, ASBOs have been replaced in England, Wales and NI by Community Protection Notices, Criminal Behaviour Notices and Civil Injunctions.

For the third time on this thread, here is the link:

www.gov.uk/civil-injunctions-criminal-behaviour-orders

Why can't he be served with a CPN?

He might not be a pervert just mentally ill BUT HIS ACTIONS ARE PERVERTED.

He is dressing up in a girl school uniform and wearing it NEXT TO THAT SCHOOL AND IN A BUS CONNECTING TO IT - ALL PLACES WHERE GIRLS OF THAT SCHOOL TRAVEL

that’s indefensible.

I don’t have to have a window into his soul to understand his actions amount to harassment, at least.

he should be forbidden from wearing girls uniform and being near ANY school. Plus getting him mental help asap.

as is, we are letting him

1. understand his behaviour is acceptable (wtf?!)
2. increases his risk of escalation
3. TEACHES GIRLS THAT THEIR FEELINGS OF DISCOMFORT DONT MATTER AND THAT THEY SHOULDN’T TRUST THEIR INSTINCT, AND THE FEELING OF MENTALLY ILL MEN MATTER MORE THAN THEIRS, AND ITS OK TO BE HARASSED BY MEN

are you ok with all or any of these?! @Onnabugeisha

If the Dads got together and “talked” to him there is nobody that would shop them. The police are doing fuck all. He needs removing.

Do you think every pervert who hangs around schools is a poor victim of mental health issues and that means they can’t possibly be a danger?!

They would have done this years ago. Not sure why they can't do it now.

I just don’t think it’s a universal issue with all police forces in the U.K. and the reports coming out aren’t showing #s that rate the tone of the sensationalist headlines.

And mine too. I hope you’re healing as best as possible x

Sigh, the question is pervert OR mentally ill. You’re not really comprehending that you can be one without the other.

He possibly doesn't have the capacity to realise what he is doing is deeply disturbing to people and children

Then why did he lie to the school uniform shop, saying the skirt was for his granddaughter? He knows.

😂🤣😂 what an idiotic comment. 800 officers being reinvestigates in the Met alone.

Why do you look to minimise the abuse of women and girls?

And you can be both. Why are you only paying consideration to the idea that he’s some innocent confused man with mental health issues? Do you not believe in safeguarding for some reason?