To think that a man standing outside a school in girls uniform is not OK?

[crinklemum2]

Name changed as this is very local and he was seen wearing my DD's school uniform.

A local school uniform shop shared images to reassure parents they would not be selling him any items. Essex police say he poses no risk and people should stop sharing the photos. He looks to be late 50s/early 60s.

He's been seen around schools - both primary and secondary - dressed as a school girl (in their uniform). I am fucking outraged that the police don't seem to think that's an issue. God forbid we offend men or shame their fetishes.

AIBU that this must be an antisocial behaviour at the very least?

@louiselouiselouise This is little better than women who have been raped being blamed for it because they wore revealing clothing "she was gagging for it your honor!" Victim blaming at its finest and disgusting from another women.

You’re not being genuine at all. You’re ignoring other posters.

Why does he need the school and the school children in his life? Why can’t he cross dress in private at home? Do you think his behaviour is acceptable and should be allowed to continue?

Yes I am. And I know it is an unpopular view. There were scores of convicted sex offenders from my school who come out of the woodwork over time. As a child, I remember how it felt to be asked to stay behind after school to do jobs for teachers, to have my legs stroked, to be asked to bend over and pick things up from the floor. I was suspended for going in trousers and asked to remove a long skirt and change into something above the knee.

I don't remember anything to do with wearing a skirt with liberation and I will be dammed if my daughter will do the same. But I think taking her out of the Catholic education system is also partly to do with that

This man could well have been a teacher at my school at some point or a 'friendly' caretaker. Walking around with a visible boner. Its my choice - I just would not send my daughter out to school in a skirt because of people like this. I don't get how anyone thinks a skirt is a form of liberation

To add to my earlier post: I'm not sure now that it's accurate to say he's taking photos of the pupils. Would welcome clarification either way.

And I'd have thought it conceivable that a public order offence may be being committed, the one about behaving in a way that would cause "harrassment, alarm or distress" or something similar. Going by the reactions on here, it's pretty clear that this is giving rise to a lot of alarm. I agree. Surely it's having this effect on the school's parents? I'd add that to my comms with my MP and the governors.

If this guy decides to call himself Jane and decides he feels like using the same toilet or changing room as a 12 year old girl, he’ll be allowed to because nobody will want to hurt his feelings.

This is the world we are living in. Fetishists and predators can now openly display themselves in plain sight and nobody feels they can do anything about it.

Yet we are still teaching safeguarding in schools. That the child’s safety and well-being is paramount. That we should report any sort of behaviour that means a person might be unsuitable to work with children. That we should be vigilant and alert to the patterns of sex offenders and how sexual offending against children starts small and develops.

It’s a fucking joke.

Ahh but does your DNiece wear a short skirt? Because if she does you know it's her fault, right? According to @louiselouiselouise. The poor mens can't help themselves 😢

There are probably legions of these disgusting specimens lurking on the thread getting off on the fact that they can do what they like now. Planning for the next school to infect. Chortling in their network.

I was forced to 'gag for it' as a child and hated it. I never chose to wear a skirt

I read and understood your words but in my opinion no, you didn't answer that all. Let's leave it there.

I agree.

I think we all need to remember that MN is an open forum and therefore not every poster will be responding in good faith. Minimising behaviour like this serves a purpose; it's not merely a naive, uniformed #bekind view.

A link to the story of Michael Wilson mentioned upthread:

www.hulldailymail.co.uk/news/hull-east-yorkshire-news/predator-sex-assault-school-uniform-3924701.amp

There's a difference between someone cross-dressing, going about their business, shopping, whatever and someone wearing a school girl's uniform and hanging around school, using the school bus and photographing kids.

There's a difference between someone cross-dressing, getting off on it at home, in private, wanking, whatever and someone wearing a school girl's uniform and hanging around school, using the school bus and photographing kids.

Hanging around school, using the school bus and photographing kids are massive red flags. Then there's the additional red flag of wearing the uniform too - school uniforms are a known sexual fetish.

I answered, but will again.

I am afraid of all of the above. Also, I am afraid he is going to attack a student. There may not be a link between cross dressing and child sexual abuse, but there sure as hell is a link between deliberately seeking out children to hang around their school while dressed inapprorpiately, and child sexual abuse. As I said earlier, the fact that he is behaving in an erratic and deviant way should just in itself mean that his behaviour is unpredicatble, and thus not safe for him to be hanging around outside a school.

Also, and in general, I am afraid of a general trend of letting men intimidate young children in this way, and getting news reports that nothing is being done to stop them. This is because even if this man ends up not physically harming anyone, there are people who DO want to harm children who will be very interested to learn that they are now allowed to hang around outside schools and on the kids' school bus. I am afraid to live in a society where women and children are even more vulnerable to men and their sexual violence than we already are.

No. You don't get to close down posters like that. I think JudgeRudy asks a reasonable question. You don't have to like or approve of someone's behaviour but you can't make a blanket assumption that because you think they are weird their next move is sexual assault without a stronger basis than "he's a weirdo". JudgeRudy isn't a handmaiden, they're just declining to join a mob with pitchforks.

Sorry, what?

He has already escalated. After reading the FB posts, one apparently from a family member, who claims he has mental health problems, but does have capacity. He has been doing this for years. Claims he is transgender.

Wore school girl uniform under overalls, to loiter around local schools.
Went on to wear it openly.
Purchased school girl skirt claiming it was for a granddaughter.
Takes photos of the children.
Has tried gaining access to the school by jumping the fence. Apparently not the first time as they said he tried AGAIN.

How has he not been arrested?

Its my choice - I just would not send my daughter out to school in a skirt because of people like this. I don't get how anyone thinks a skirt is a form of liberation

You do realise men perv on school girls in trousers too? 🙄

Fucking hell 🤦🏻‍♀️

Google gov.uk safeguarding children it may be useful I don't have time to do it now

Just horrible to see some women here acting as apologists for sexual perverts who prey on children.

If he is entitled to do this, people are entitled to take photos and share. Grotty perv is spot on.

Safeguarding children detailed information is the site

The one 'good' thing about this is that at least he's on everyone's radar now. Better than hiding in plain sight like so many others

I answered it too, again, no reply.

Clearly it suits better to pretend that nobody has any answer.