To object to my child being coded unauthorised absence

[BestFaceForward]

300 miles from home for Christmas with my elderly mum she was taken to hospital on Christmas Eve, spent 4 days in A&E and was then admitted to a ward where she died on 4th January. I was with her, she passed away very gently.

I let school know that we probably wouldn’t be able to return home for the start of term and have kept them updated.

I have made support arrangements for my child who has an EHCP and definitely needs to be with me.

Due to pressure on Hospitals and Registrars I couldn’t register Mum’s death until 13th and she couldn’t be picked up by the funeral directors until yesterday.

Her funeral is next week.

In the midst of all this my child’s father has discovered his rapidly increasing symptoms are probably not a trapped nerve but could well be Motor Neuron Disease.

I am feeling pretty unreasonable, irritable even. And I know it (fellow Alanon member insert wry laugh here).

FFS is it the best the education system can do to describe my child’s absence as unauthorised? Will transport to school which I have never used, although theoretically eligible, now offer a private jet? I somehow think not.

Rant not over but to be continued.

Supportive swearing will be much appreciated. Any suggestions however unusual will be gratefully or humorously considered, as required. And if you think I should cancel my mum’s funeral, abandon my child’s father or officially withdraw my kid from state education and start homeschooling please don’t hesitate to tell me. I’ll have the biggest bunch of flowers ever for the wonderful TA who has turned my little chap’s learning and friendships around 180 degrees.

Fuck off now any other character building opportunities.

Rather than waiting to go back, I'd send all the relevant information now to the school. In that way, they can pre-empt any LEA safeguarding trigger due to the excessive absences.

The question a pp asked you that seems like a bolt from the blue is because of your namechange fail on a relevant thread btw.

Take care.

Once we’re back I’ll write to the LA and explain that I did arrange for kid to be educated off site, I’ll have plenty of evidence and as a former maths teacher I think I’ll be able to give a reasonable account.
You can't do that as educated off site (B code in the register) is for off site education provision where the school is responsible for the education and have to be satisfied of the safeguarding responsibilities of the provider.It isn't allowed to be used for pupils doing work at home.

It's great you've put things in place over a difficult time, but the school would be on dodgy ground marking this absence as a B.

This code should be used when pupils are present at an off-site educational activity that has been approved by the school. Ultimately schools are responsible for the safeguarding and welfare of pupils educated off-site. (See Legislation).

Therefore by using code B, schools are certifying that the education is supervised and measures have been taken to safeguard pupils.

This code should not be used for any unsupervised educational activity or where a pupil is at home doing school work.

Schools should ensure that they have arrangements in place to ensure the provider of the alternative education notifies the school of any absences by individual pupils.

I'm afraid the above doesn't match your situation.

I really wouldn't bother wasting your time.

The letter on a register really REALLY doesn't matter, especially if your kid usually has good attendance.

Honestly, think, will you care this much this time next year? Or will it be forgotten?

A half term of unauthorised absence really does matter. He has now reached the 15 day absence mark where the school and local authority have an obligation to start offering alternative provision
the school should be in contact with the inclusion officer at the council to see what they can do
because this is what should happen if a child misses school for 3 weeks

if all the school do is place a letter on file and say it’s fine a child is missing that much time with little interaction between them and the family it’s is a complete failure on their part

in this instance the OP has it all under control - she knows that the school doesn’t. Plus the procedures need to be followed for those times the child isn’t.

proper communication between everyone is key

and gives can start at 5 days worth of unauthorised absence

The absences can be recoded. I once made it happen for a student of mine.

I know it's easier said than done, but please don't take the attendance codes personally. It's not a value judgement on behalf of the school. If you feel it is necessary to have your child with you, away from their school environment during difficult family times, then that's the best choice for your family.

However, because of Ofsted and legal obligations, the school must mark the absence as they see fit. But that's all it is. A mark on a record, that is insignificant at the end of the day. Take care.

But, unless their attendance is low and at risk of fines etc then it makes little difference.

But it also depends on the reason of absence.
I had a child missing for a month because they had to travel to a different country for a family illness and subsequent funeral, and it's different than parent taking a nice holiday to Florida and having fun in Disneyland. Schools and LAs can be very reasonable about it when properly informed.

There attendance is low at the moment though they have missed 3 out of 15 weeks putting attendance at around 80% and if the OP has another 2 weeks off it will end at around 70%. A percentage that can if it is unauthorised raise all sorts of flags and is a risk of fines. 10 unauthorised are a fine she could be on 5 times that at least on his return

Schools can decide whether this absence is authorised (therefore avoiding fines etc) or unauthorised but this involves properly informing them

i don’t think myself or the others who are saying to keep the school informed are saying the OP shouldn’t stay or that it isn’t fine for her to do so. Proper communication with the correct people will save a lot of trouble. All of this is documented as a permanent thing.

and it should be this way too many children slip through the cracks it shouldn’t be that someone can simply take a child out and expect everything to be ok

But we're talking about two totally different things- I only said there are times when long absence is understandable, justified and LA takes extreme circumstances into consideration, not that that they are always justified, wonder why people feel the need to argue a point that has not been made.

I quoted the wrong one I think we are agreeing I meant to quote the one you are

that she needs to communicate this all and it will be fine

I’m just pausing here to thank you again on my electronic way to do the Order of Service and prayer cards.

I can’t catch up with the thread now but it is one of the things which has helped pull me down to earth. Yesterday the floods of grief hit me in church when I had the chance to have time to myself without phone email or errands.

I realise that this will sound like a drip feed which honestly wasn’t intended. School and the head in particular have been lovely. From what she emailed at one point she will code as educated else where if it is doable within the rules she has to follow.

I haven’t been totally out of touch with school, in a rather ragged way from our end we have had regular zooms with my child’s TA and some classmates. I’ve totally failed on the logging on to school maths because of our tech failures. Somehow I didn’t think to pack my computer and printer for the Christmas holidays 🙄. All the tech we brought is on it’s last legs and it’s been a nightmare.

I’m usually quite patient and philosophical about difficulties. At the moment I’ve needed to tap into an element of anger to give me the energy to keep going. I’m horribly homesick. I think the strain is beginning to tell.

I might not be back here before Mum’s funeral, thank you everyone who came to this wailing space with kindness, wisdom and presence. You have all helped.

You're doing so well @BestFaceForward I hope the funeral goes smoothly.

It will take a good long while before you start to feel back to normal, @BestFaceForward - the death of someone's mother is a terrible blow and your emotions will be all over the place for ages.

I am glad that some of the comments on this thread have been helpful to you. Venting, in and of itself, is usually cathartic.

Sending you and your child love.