To phone in sick

[KrossKriss]

If you worked in a school as a midday supervisor and you had a weekend away booked to celebrate a milestone birthday, would you ever contemplate phoning in sick so that you could take advantage of having the full day away? This is what I’m trying to decide but I’m torn.

I’m going away with my dh husband tomorrow and the other day he suggested phoning in sick so that we could set off early morning once our youngest dc is at school (instead of 1.30pm) so that we can explore the area, go for lunch etc before checking into our accommodation at 3pm. At first i said no but I’m now debating.

For context I know I only work an hour or so each day but I am far from work shy, I work very hard, but I’m struggling and have been for the last year. I struggle with anxiety and in the last year I’ve been diagnosed with autism, as has my dd. I have also for the last 18 months been struggling with (early) perimenopause. I’m a shadow of my former self and this last year there have been times I haven’t recognised myself, it’s been horrendous. I’ve been a weeping, emotional,
sleep deprived mess which ultimately has impacted ok every aspect of my life.

Now I know I’m ranting and i expect I know what you’re thinking, that I’m rhyming off all of my ailments to justify me wanting a day off work, but it’s not as simple as that. The job itself isn’t great. I didn’t go into the job with my blinkers on and I was under no illusion that it would be easy but in the relatively short time I’ve been in the role my anxiety has got worse. I’ve experienced borderline work place bullying from two members of staff that i really should’ve reported but I’m to soft, and my work load is ridiculous due to the same members of staff repeatedly phoning in sick for weeks at a time. It’s a thankless undervalued job and I dread going in most days. If i was happy in my job and as treated fairly I wouldn’t even be considering phoning in sick when I’m not poorly but then my dh (who has a solid work ethic and has only had three days off sick in 21 years) says it’s up to me but if he were so unhappy in his job he wouldn’t care less and just take the day off. Thoughts?

It depends on how you do it. Of course people with inflexible holiday entitlement sometimes need to take unpaid leave for life events. I know teachers who have taken unpaid leave for their children's graduations or weddings, or to take children to an event. If you are a good employee who rarely asks for favours, it is completely reasonable to say "I would not usually ask, but I would like to take this day of unpaid leave. I know some people might take a sick day, but I don't feel comfortable doing that ........." knowing that if they come back with an unreasonable response you can resign without feeling it to be a loss.

When did I moan about the job being term time? I said I couldn’t afford to go away in term time but that’s only because it would be valentine’s weekend and the place we are staying was just over double the price. I do however go away in the main summer holidays with my dc which we have to save for.

Nope- not true. When I'm off sick it creates extra stress for my colleagues that I like. I wont do that to someone else simply because I want to take a holiday/break etc.

Op who cares? Phone in sick if you want!
You're not the first and you wont be the last.
Not everything needs to be a thread.

Should you lie? If your child asked you if it was ok for them to lie to avoid a morning at school, would you say yes?

I did it once. Know my co workers would be fine and they were.

Knew*

You work one hour a day and you're thinking of phoning in sick when you're not sick. Please don't ever call yourself a HARD WORKER! You are the very opposite.

I work as a Welfare Assistant at Lunch times( AKA Dinner Lady). I 'only' do 8.5 hours a week. I feel absolutely exhausted after I do my nearly 2 hrs a day. Like you said OP it is an undervalued and thankless job.
There are 2 members of Staff who take off so much time, one who has to take off at least 1 day off a week due to one reason or another. And to be honest in our School no TA or Teacher is called to go in their place we just carry on as best as we can. If you were a person who didn't take lots of days off I wouldn't mind you taking a day off at all. The School will be fine it is only 2 hours!

You literally said you want to take time off because you cant afford to go away in non term time. So what? thats not your employers responsibility is it and you knew when you took the job those were the terms. Many of us are having to curtail holidays in the current financial climate- thats life, it doesnt mean we are going to lie about stuff just to get what we want.

@naughty40me this is exactly what it is like at the school I work at, only I’m expected to help restrain children even though I’ve only had an hour and half training on the subject. I stay behind at least 10 sometimes 20 mins each day to fill out accident forms, records incidents on the internal system etc and for that I don’t get paid. There are some amazing lovely children at my school but there are also a lot of children who are struggling whether they be to undiagnosed conditions, anxiety etc and I’m expected to deal with this effectively very often by myself with little to no training. I knew the job would be challenging go into it but I didn’t expect it to be quite like this.

@KrossKriss aside from the actual issue, I’m sorry about the really horrible and spiteful replies you’ve been getting from a few particular posters OP. Comments on the number of hours you work and your autism are out of order. You’re not a vile person, you just seem overwhelmed with things and struggling to make a choice. I’d be on the fence too.

Off course most people have @Emmamoo89
But you know MN and pretence are like 5&6

I would do it and just be careful not to put anything on social media or tell anyone at work. You're a midday supervisor not a brain surgeon. A colleague can cover for you on this one occasion as you have covered for colleagues before

Ok? so carry on doing it then. You said everyone does it- I am saying not everyone does, as have many others in this thread.

honestly, i would just take it, you obviously need the break, and you don't need ANYONE elses permission or approval. But.. if you want it.. i'm an adult with ASD/ADHD, a Mental Health First Aider, and a parent to a teen with ASD/ADHD and i KNOW how important taking occasional MH days are when you're burned out... i say go for it.

Call in sick, relax, enjoy your holiday.

call in sick and enjoy yourself. Lives too short and you’re hardly breaking the law!

No one should be restraining children! Especially un qualified, lunchtime supervisors! This is a massive safeguarding issue that you should be raising with the head OP. As I've said already you shouldn't call in sick, but you should be looking for another job. It sounds like a shambles.

All those posters going on about how the Op does not work hard, should try doing her job for a week. That would soon shut them up. How hard she works is not the point of the thread though.

You are coming across as being difficult and argumentative. If lunchtime supervision an hour a day is too much for you, do the children a favour and quit the job.

I'm not going to do it again. Most people do

You're going to call in sick when you're not sick, but are trying to justify it by saying you have been struggling with anxiety and aren't enjoying the job.

Long story short, you're not too sick to go in a week from today and want the day off so you can go away for the weekend. You know that's wrong so why are you asking for validation

OP call in sick and enjoy!!!

But its not a MH day because OP needs it. Its a planned sickie so she can go away for the weekend

Two very different things