Wedding guest attire

[honda1114]

NC as I know my MIL is on here!

BIL is getting married in the summer. A little while away, I know, but I have a household full of teenage girls who are obsessing excitedly about what to wear.

Showed one of the dresses my 21yo DD said she liked for the wedding, and MIL said it was far too dressy, and next to the rest of us (who don't even know what we're wearing yet) she will stand out like a sore thumb.

I didn't really know what to say to that as I thought a wedding was about as dressy as you get!

I have been to a few weddings but my DDs haven't been to any since they were small so they don't have a comparison and I can't say I can remember what girls of that age wore at previous ones Ive been to!

I'll attach pictures of dresses similar to what she liked. She doesn't want anything particularly clingy as she is a bit weight conscious (probably due to comments from MIL)

If you saw a young girl wearing a dress similar to these at a wedding would you think she was too dressed up? And if so, what would you expect someone of that age to be dressed in?

@honda1114

“No one should dress for anyone other than themselves. You are not dressing for the bride and groom when you go to their wedding.”

well you kind of do dress the bride and groom. You want to look nice and presentable for them, not too much skin on show etc. You’re gonna be in the photos etc. It’s their day, not yours or your daughters.

I think many people on this thread have been bitchy all the way through! I’ve made it clear that I think wedding clothes should suit the wedding. Some people say they don’t care. I’ve said some people do. As no one will know what DD thinks it’s all a bit pointless. She’s still entitled to think what she likes. As are you. The idea that women don’t judge other women is fanciful and obviously ludicrous by the way. We all do. Just as you have judged my daughter. Perhaps you are bitchy too! Or maybe just bitchy to people behind their backs on a keyboard?

If you're talking about me, then it's justified bitchy-ness 😆
I also think it's lame to try and shut down a discussion by saying the other person is jealous or insecure

This!! It's a wedding ffs!

I didn't say that. I said she was unpleasant and unkind, which I stand by.

The irony I see is how quick a lot of the ‘anything goes’ supporters are to character assassination, ridicule and ad hominem attacks when anyone raises the slightest objection to their way of thinking.

I haven't read anything into what you said, which was:

I know my DD will clock every single guest when (and if) she gets married. She’s already saying how so and so looked poorly turned out at recent weddings she’s been to.

Maybe it's just me, but that doesn't strike me as normal behaviour from a person who is entirely happy in themselves.

But you say she has a well paid job, her own flat and no student loan, so I must be wrong 😊 I won't engage further.

I wouldn't presume tbf, you can't necessarily tell the insecure ones just from their outward achievements. You're talking about her spending her own wedding judging the outfits of the female guests, deciding if they're good enough or not. That doesn't sound like a secure and confident person.

Yes of course if someone wears something really out there or "inappropriate" people will notice and comment, but your daughter seems obsessed on external appearances and how she measures up / how other people compare. That isn't healthy.