Wedding guest attire

[honda1114]

NC as I know my MIL is on here!

BIL is getting married in the summer. A little while away, I know, but I have a household full of teenage girls who are obsessing excitedly about what to wear.

Showed one of the dresses my 21yo DD said she liked for the wedding, and MIL said it was far too dressy, and next to the rest of us (who don't even know what we're wearing yet) she will stand out like a sore thumb.

I didn't really know what to say to that as I thought a wedding was about as dressy as you get!

I have been to a few weddings but my DDs haven't been to any since they were small so they don't have a comparison and I can't say I can remember what girls of that age wore at previous ones Ive been to!

I'll attach pictures of dresses similar to what she liked. She doesn't want anything particularly clingy as she is a bit weight conscious (probably due to comments from MIL)

If you saw a young girl wearing a dress similar to these at a wedding would you think she was too dressed up? And if so, what would you expect someone of that age to be dressed in?

My mind boggles at how you've got from is this dress suitable for a wedding? to ambulance crew being diverted from genuinely sick people 🤔

Are you a Daily Mail reader by any chance?

I have no words for that poster 😂😂

Both my SILs had similar dresses and they looked nice. Definitely not attention seeking etc. Some people will try to cure their own insecurities by making you feel like shit. Ignore.

Have your daughters looked ok Chi Chi , they have a wedding guests section and probably aimed at the 20-30 age range

www.chichiclothing.com/collections/wedding-guests

If you think that’s wearing as little as possible you haven’t been in our city centre recently!

As I said before, my dd wore the green dress to her sixth form prom. She then went into the city and went clubbing. Her breasts were safely inside the dress, and the split skirt simply meant she could walk safely. The split isn’t visible in any normal pose.

Despite wearing this dress she managed not to get rat-arsed, start any fights or collapse in her own vomit. She didn’t divert any ambulances either.

You are judging girls for wearing a perfectly normal evening dress and it disgusts me reading your post. You will see a hell of a lot more flesh in an average summer dress or shorts and top combo than you see in those two dresses, do you judge people wearing summer clothes?

I was getting Lady Grantham vibes initially but the latest post/rant went straight into Katy Hopkins territory.

Ladyinpuce: that is the most marvellously pearl-clutchy post I've seen in a while! 😁And its a RG uni with a very high preponderance of ex public school students. What is the world coming to??!

@Calphurnia
My mind boggles at how you've got from is this dress suitable for a wedding? to ambulance crew being diverted from genuinely sick people ?

Are you not following the thread?
When I expressed concern about girls showing too much skin, I was advised never to go into any city centre after dark as it might give me a heart attack !
As I have been in several city centres after dark I responded as I did.
I hope that clears it up.

@SleepingStandingUp
Is it not up to the couple to be clear about how the wedding is organised and where guests can change clothes if they wish? Going from church to steamy disco isn’t easy! So be clear about dress and getting ready for the evening. Make a room available?

I'm not sure providing one room for everyone to do a quick clothes swap is a great plan 😂 I just think it makes getting the style right harder, partic is you're young and stylish.

Having said that, I can barely remember what people wore and wouldn't have felt like no one looked at me if one of the younger girls had come in something "sexy".

The biggest controversy was church breastfeeding of toddler - yay or nay.

I’ve seen it done successfully! For the young! Lots of wedding guests now have rooms at the hotel too so getting ready is easier. Weddings basically are littered with difficulties! In fact the smartest thing to do is have the party on another day! Then everyone gets it! Party time!

@Calphurnia
I was getting Lady Grantham vibes initially but the latest post/rant went straight into Katy Hopkins territory.

Oi, why am I getting all the flack?
I wasn't the poster who mentioned about “prostitutes crashing the wedding”
😳

@TizerorFizz Is it not up to the couple to be clear about how the wedding is organised and where guests can change clothes if they wish? Going from church to steamy disco isn’t easy! So be clear about dress and getting ready for the evening. Make a room available

At last some common sense.

@Ladyinpuce
Yep. Solutions can be found!

It’s about being appropriate for the occasion. The wedding is about the bride and groom and naturally a focus will be on the bride in her dress.

Wearing a low cut evening dress with a slit up to the crotch to someone else’s wedding is not appropriate. The message is, look at me, look how sexy I am. At a wedding. Not the time or place. Basic good manners and courtesy. The posters here are trying to be diplomatic as was your mil.

My last comment was deleted, rightly so.

So without personal attacks, I found your comment implying what a women wears (on a night out) is an indicator for their behaviour to be judgemental and misogynistic. It's in a similar ballpark to 'she was asking for it, wearing that,' and not something I want to see on a forum aimed predominantly for women.

Hope that clears it up.

Focus - I doubt very much that the focus will be on a 21 yr old in a sombre coloured dress to her ankles rather than the woman in the white dress with the veil on.
The slit - the OPs DD will hardly be striking a pose for any photographs sticking her leg out like Angelina Jolie at the Oscars. Standing normally in either dress the fabric would hang down without any crotches or legs on display. Sat down at the ceremony and the meal nothing will be on show either.
Low cut - yes but hardly extreme, have you actually looked at the whole picture? The women in the pictures haven’t exactly what you would call a heaving cleavage that they’re struggling to contain within the dress. The dress on the right is quite lovely.
How sexy am I - Shouldn’t anyone feel sexy/attractive choosing their attire for a wedding? Just because someone feels good in what they’re wearing doesn’t make them some sort of narcissistic scarlet woman.
Hope you’ve got your beige shift dress and cardi dry cleaned just in case there are any invitations in the pipeline.

If you are invited to and attend a wedding, it’s not about you. It’s not about your need to ‘feel sexy’. It’s about your support for the two people getting married. In a sense, you’re dressing for them. Appropriately. Just as you wouldn’t come to a wedding in ripped jeans and dirty sneakers, unless that were the dress code, similarly you wouldn’t come wearing an evening dress that in itself is not appropriate for a daytime wedding and then cut low in front with a giant slit up to the crotch. I’m sorry, how can you not understand that? It is having respect for yourself, the people, and the situation by realizing it’s not about you. It’s the couple’s day, not yours. This is basic good manners because it is based on courtesy for others.

I didn’t get my crotch out but I did wear a low cut dress, and I’ve just spotted that if you look hard you can see my bra. I received lots of compliments on my outfit but according to you I can’t have any self respect. I’d wear it to work if it wasn’t for health and safety!

@FamilyFunAdventure lovely dress! Lovely figure!

I see you were drinking, is that ladylike refined or acceptable in day light? Were either your or DH sober enough to take your DC (yes they may be adults, but so what!) to hospital I'm an emergency?

Honestly, you should've worn head to toe crinoline and drunk plain water!

Some women do not know their place..

You look lovely @FamilyFunAdventure! Your dress is pretty and appropriate in my opinion and I quite like it. I think the high slit combined with the low front and the evening style of the other dress just isn’t appropriate.

@Calphurnia - I found your comment implying what a women wears (on a night out) is an indicator for their behaviour to be judgemental and misogynistic. It's in a similar ballpark to 'she was asking for it, wearing that,' and not something I want to see on a forum aimed predominantly for women.

I wasn't implying anything.
I was describing what I have seen with my own eyes in City Centres late at night and have formed an opinion based on that.
I have seen who comes in through the doors of an A & E Dept late at night and formed an opinion based on that.
If you don't like my opinion that's your perogative but I refuse to be harangued for having an valid opinion.

I'm gonna jump on the bandwagon and suggest an outfit. I just saw this and thought it was quite nice, thoughts?

https://www.prettylittlething.com/black-floral-puff-sleeve-draped-neck-midi-dress.html?istCompanyId=3b233929-048d-4b79-a672-b37827e7282d&istFeedId=9fb1402b-64fa-465e-b3db-9422d77ab0a4&istItemId=imwxrmtmp&istBid=t&utmsource=social&utmmmedium=display&utmcampaign=UKKSprinklrASCCConversions+Campaign&utmcontent=ASCCPRODSET&fbclid=IwAR0fW33pwT17RrI9rl56hWQmsztI7nMDylCk4PDqJfn0SFfYr71b7KTaEggaemAd4SlOaWVrbriLe3BFBinO5OAROrj2vhg9wOq6xxGk2Qt0b3NmzwPmhHS6bkAbg-Oy2jwzzdo6gsYbr7h6xeXX0nCmrS3Z9wJnTdp9WZXOZPPvLz20xZIhmmqDUYbdQBKRQ6PtujKX3sIR7ZN08Ul6Ys&adid=6307701078235&campaignn_id=6307700461035&refresh=1674066977626