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Original poster

Settle a household debate - having a drink and being in charge of kids

523 replies

DuffLite · 16/01/2023 20:01

How much would you say is fine to drink if you were “in charge” of your kids on say a Saturday night. All already fed and nobody needing to go out so no requirement to cook etc - everyone just chilling out for the evening, doing their own thing

OP posts:
Highabovethetrees · 16/01/2023 20:36

I wouldn't drink anything with a one-year-old... Now my DC are 6 and 4, I very occasionally have one glass on a special occasion... Like Christmas. I don't really like drinking in front of them as I don't want to normalise every day drinking.

Moken · 16/01/2023 20:36

Two or three glasses of wine I guess. We live in a pretty connected area and my DH doesn't drink, but I hate getting drunk so tend to stop at that anyway.

I only open the bottle when the kids are in bed though, apart from a Saturday night, when I have a civilised early evening cocktail Grin

Original poster
DuffLite · 16/01/2023 20:37

Yes my own kids

1 year old
2.5 year old
7 year old

OP posts:
Pinkwaterbortle · 16/01/2023 20:37

Nothin

Isyesterdaytomorrowtoday · 16/01/2023 20:37

One or max 2 before the little ones are in bed. After that maybe a couple more. Could get a taxi in an emergency.

my 11yo has never seen me actually drunk (maybe a little tipsy) & that’s not because I’m any kind of saint, it’s just not very nice as a child. My Dad would often be a bit drunk when I was young and I didn’t like it.

MrsTerryPratchett · 16/01/2023 20:38

Why have three kids when your idea of fun is getting rat-arsed? Just enjoy a party life.

Or have one and get pissed when it's older.

Aloezebra · 16/01/2023 20:38

@Ruffpuff it’s more likely that people who would need to be able to drive in an emergency live in places where driving is required whereas if you don’t drive you probably wouldn’t chose to live in such places

Original poster
DuffLite · 16/01/2023 20:38

Isyesterdaytomorrowtoday · 16/01/2023 20:37

One or max 2 before the little ones are in bed. After that maybe a couple more. Could get a taxi in an emergency.

my 11yo has never seen me actually drunk (maybe a little tipsy) & that’s not because I’m any kind of saint, it’s just not very nice as a child. My Dad would often be a bit drunk when I was young and I didn’t like it.

Not liking something doesn’t mean it’s wrong

I didn’t use to like the toaster when I was a child - so what

OP posts:
Topee · 16/01/2023 20:40

I don’t get drunk at home, just one maybe two glasses. I only drink more if I’m
out.

I think getting pissed in front of young children is unnecessary and unwise.

Matilda1981 · 16/01/2023 20:41

Some of these responses are crazy! We often (once every few months) have people round for a bit of a gathering and have quite a lot to drink when our kids are here!! I’m not the only one in our friendship group to do this! We also go camping as a big group and have drinks in the evenings when the kids are asleep - bonus of all being together and not having to worry about getting babysitters.

Moken · 16/01/2023 20:41

Not liking something doesn’t mean it’s wrong. I didn’t use to like the toaster when I was a child - so what

What an excellent analogy. Drunk parents -> toasters. Perfect.

Isyesterdaytomorrowtoday · 16/01/2023 20:41

You didn’t like the toaster? Are you currently drunk OP?

I remember as a child that I didn’t like the feeling of seeing my parent drunk- why would I then inflict that on my child? IMO doing something in the knowledge that it may make my kid feel unsafe is wrong.

PinkSyCo · 16/01/2023 20:41

It depends how well you can hold your booze surely. I can drink a full bottle and not feel any affects. Two bottles and I’d probably feel a bit squiffy.

toocold54 · 16/01/2023 20:41

I will get shot down but I don’t see anything wrong with getting pretty pissed so long as the kids are doing their own thing

I agree but in your case your kids are way too young to be able to do their own thing.

Therefore, you shouldn’t be getting pretty pissed when looking after them.

It’s one thing to have 1 too many but to get intentionally pissed with 3 young kids (2 very young) is pretty shit parenting.

Anotheanon · 16/01/2023 20:41

Are you really comparing a drunk parent with a toaster @DuffLite

I think you have issues.

Highabovethetrees · 16/01/2023 20:41

Donotgogentle · 16/01/2023 20:21

Because children rely on you to be responsive and in control. It can be upsetting if you’re not.

Show quote history

This. My parents were often drunk growing up and it was a horrible experience.

Matilda1981 · 16/01/2023 20:41

And we often go out and have drinks and come home and let the babysitter go home!!!

Woolandwonder · 16/01/2023 20:42

It obviously can be upsetting and confusing for kids to see their parents (or other adults drunk) slurring, smelling of alcohol, behaving differently to usual. I don't see issue with having a few drinks, but knowing your limits and being able to respond appropriately is really important. It's not nice for children, it can make them feel unsafe.

KleineDracheKokosnuss · 16/01/2023 20:42

A single G&T so I can still drive.

What exactly is “a proper drink” and why would it be so terrible for you not to have one? Do you not enjoy life without drinking? Do you find it hard to relax unless alcohol is involved?

I save my drinking for nights out when the kids are being babysat by grandad. I have a fine time and don’t need to worry about the kids. I don’t feel any desire to get sloshed while I’m charge of them.

BatildaB · 16/01/2023 20:42

Parents being a bit drunk on special occasions or with friends over is one thing. A parent hammering it alone on a regular basis while in charge is not a happy childhood.

Hellybelly84 · 16/01/2023 20:42

You know your own tolerance - if you are on your own (partner out/working), then I would say not enough that you wouldn’t be able to help in an emergency (child suddenly feeling ill etc). If partner home, as much as you want! 😀

Original poster
DuffLite · 16/01/2023 20:43

Matilda1981 · 16/01/2023 20:41

Some of these responses are crazy! We often (once every few months) have people round for a bit of a gathering and have quite a lot to drink when our kids are here!! I’m not the only one in our friendship group to do this! We also go camping as a big group and have drinks in the evenings when the kids are asleep - bonus of all being together and not having to worry about getting babysitters.

Thank god someone else who doesn’t live in pearl-clutcher land!

OP posts:
queenmeadhbh · 16/01/2023 20:43

Are you the mother of these children?

i can’t imagine being comfortable with being impaired while responsible for a baby, which a 1 year old still is.

Headabovetheparakeet · 16/01/2023 20:43

Not liking something doesn’t mean it’s wrong

I know plenty of adults who still have issues with the amount their parents drank when they were kids.

Moken · 16/01/2023 20:43

DuffLite · 16/01/2023 20:37

Yes my own kids

1 year old
2.5 year old
7 year old

How are kids this young - particularly the youngest two - just 'chilling out and doing their own thing' while you get drunk?

Is this a wind up?

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