AWBU blended family drama

[Shawaddywaddeee]

So myself and my partner thought it would be nice to take our older kids away (without the younger ones)
On an all expenses paid holiday.
So we can go out have a laugh etc without having to be in early for the lil ones.

They agreed they'd love to go so we did our research and booked Marbella .

To our shock we've been told the location is chavvy and we're shit parents because we didn't ask where they wanted to go.

But we genuinely thought we'd taken all their own personal needs into consideration and got a great deal!

It's cost us £4000 (all inclusive) and they are saying they're not coming!

My partner is so upset because we were so excited and looking forward to having some quality time with the older kids but have been met with utter discontent :(

They are 20, 20, 18

Have we fucked up here or are they acting like spoilt brats?

Tell the spoilt brats to fuck right off and go without them

Google Rylan two years ago, Joey Essex et al

The veneers & dental choices of my fellow guests wouldn’t bother me. Their general behaviour - loud music on phones, screaming and being drunk early on might.

<twirls>

Why are bothering?

I would hire a big villa on a greek island within walking distance of a village or town and take everyone, and they either come or they don't!

Maybe on Kos? 😁

Brats. Even if that’s what they think, it’s staggeringly rude to say it.

Turkey teeth are done in Turkey, the country. Bright white stuck on things

Not at all!!!!!

The holiday is not an entitlement and further, they're not paying anything for it. They get no say over the location AND Marbella is a perfectly good destination for what the OP is trying to achieve.

The only things that needed discussing were the dates, which has been done, and if they wanted to go.

Utterly selfish and ungrateful little a-holes. OP, take some good friends instead.

Your sons girlfriend is probably the rudest of the lot! Who on earth speaks to their partners parents like that when they’ve done something nice for them?

I think it’s a bit of both though - at their ages you really should have consulted them, but they should have graciously accepted the free holiday and not acted like entitled brats.

I think even my dc would think it were a little controlling just to book something without even talking it through though. It sounds a bit controlling. They are not 2 they are 22 and it makes a world of difference.

Turkey teeth are when people go to Turkey to get veneers done and you can tell it was done there as they look so big, unnatural and white

Thank you 🙈❤️

I must be chavvy then as I would be happy to go to Marbella for a holiday, free or otherwise. You should take your son away by yourself as he shouldn't miss out.

Oh, so it's not for them? Go as a couple & have a totally carefree time.

Marbella is full of turkey teeth and ex cons, not exactly selling the place
there must be some local culture somewhere. Small Spanish villages, tapas, fresh fish if it is close to the sea, local people and historical sites. I can't believe it is just full of turkey people surely!!!

Who does that?? It's weirdly controlling behaviour if you're going to choose places you know they will hate/many people would hate then expect them to suck it up as it's free.

So odd.

Especially after his last choice of holiday went down a bomb - you'd think their dad might have the faintest clue what they like or maybe ... ask them ....

Funny how you latched on to the one reply that fully agreed with you OP. You should have said that you just wanted validation, rather than genuinely wanting to know if anything could be changed.

I would not make arrangements for another adult without discussing those arrangements first.

Yes they are being ungrateful but you should have consulted them further on location. I can't see any of mine going to Marbella, it's very much a marmite sort of resort, not somewhere I would book

Yes, so you tell them the dates and destination then ask if they want to go.

Why wouldn't you?

Unless you get a weird control freak kick out of making people go places they don't want to go.

But we did discuss dates and Spain so thought they'd love it considering they spend every weekend drinking with friends etc 🙈

We genuinely thought the were going to love it ☹️

We got them their own rooms in a beautiful duplex with a private pool etc so away from crowds
10 mins from beach
Then it's 30 mins to town centre so have choice of chill or party

Can't believe how a genuine act of kindness has been turned into being deemed as controlling 🙈

We got them their own rooms in a beautiful duplex with a private pool etc so away from crowds
10 mins from beach
Then it's 30 mins to town centre so have choice of chill or party

But you didn't ask them what they wanted.

I think, OP, what you can learn from this thread is that your SC are not the only people who think it’s totally fine to go in about chavs with turkey teeth.

Is there a bigger issue here where your SC have been primed to be snooty about things and to complain whenever they get anything? Sadly, a lot of things about post-divorce parenting can combine to produce young adults who dismiss everything as not good enough and openly sneer about things they’re given.

I think the way you think is very odd and you need to get out more 😆

Have they seen the hotel you have booked?