What was your "this is over" moment in your marriage

[MadScottishBurd]

Just what the title says, really.

He is a good man, hardworking, loyal, so I, in no way want to paint him to be the baddie. However, I cant stop tinking about something he said to me, and at that moment, I knew it was it, that I wanted more.

During the really bad weather before Christmas - snow, sleat, wind, heavy rain.. I had a meeting at 9am at my work. I was 20 minutes late for work (not a huge amount of time but still!). My work didnt know where I was and tried calling me to see if I was alright, as the person I was meeting with was waiting for me to arrive. They accidentally phoned my emergency contact who is my (soon to be ex) husband. They had told him that it was a mistake calling him as they were trying to call me as I hadnt turned up for work.

I then arrived, started my meeting asap, and was told about this call to my husband later on, which I totally forgot about until I went home that evening.

When I was home, and after we had our dinner and was watching TV, it popped in my head.. I asked "my work said they called you today, why havent you said anything"
him: "oh, I forgot about that, something about you didnt turn up"
me: "yeah, but why didn't you try contacting me to make sure I was alright, I could have been in an accident"
him "I was busy at work, they were going to contact you"
me "I know, but werent you concerned? What if I had been in an accident, wouldnt you feel guilty??"
him: "I'm sure the police would have contacted me, had you been in an accident".

I dont think I have ever forgiven him for that comment. He wasnt in a great place at the time however he did not care, not one little bit.

What was your eureka moment?

x

I do yes babes.
Ps - I didn’t ‘demand’ anything. I asked a question. I am not sure from interacting with you if you can discern the difference in tone between asking and demanding tbf to you.

@Eyerollcentral stop interacting then? We had the flounce comment last night and you returned?

C'mon sweetie you've had little sleep, just chill today?

Erm you keep tagging me in messages? Catch you later babes

@Eyerollcentral have a nice day now, try to catch up on some sleep? It may put you in a better mood?

My 'this is it' moment was when my ex husband refused to get me a towel, which I have forgotten to take from our bedroom, before taking a shower. Ex was in bed already. At that moment, wet and cold, I knew that was it for me. Obviously, this was just one of many little uncaring acts, but that was that for me.
I am appalled at some of replies to OP.

Now exH. Many many things large & small over the years. But what made me lose any respect was the day he followed me into my Church (I'm a Christian, he's - very much- not). I'd gone in to light a candle for my recently deceased Mother & my recently deceased best friend of 35 years (lost both within same 4m). There were 2 other lights, 1 on bottom 1 on top of stand, so I put my 2 together in the middle row.
I said a prayer & was moving to a pew when I saw him step forward, take my 2 candles & put them on the floor (where they went out) & light one of his own & put it on the middle row. He turned & grinned right at me. I went across & said: 'what are you doing?'. He said 'I'm lighting a candle for my Aunt who's a bit down'. I said: 'but neither of you believe in God anyway' & he said: 'nah, but it's pretty innit' (grinned, grin). I think I released how much he hated me at that particular point.

That made me angry on your behalf - not only nasty and spiteful but unbelievably childish and petty, to go out of his way to do that! Sad, sad man.

Well done you for divorcing him!

fb.watch/ifOkL63cKA/

@Yeahrightthen

Another online outlet has picked up your post too op.