What was your "this is over" moment in your marriage

[MadScottishBurd]

Just what the title says, really.

He is a good man, hardworking, loyal, so I, in no way want to paint him to be the baddie. However, I cant stop tinking about something he said to me, and at that moment, I knew it was it, that I wanted more.

During the really bad weather before Christmas - snow, sleat, wind, heavy rain.. I had a meeting at 9am at my work. I was 20 minutes late for work (not a huge amount of time but still!). My work didnt know where I was and tried calling me to see if I was alright, as the person I was meeting with was waiting for me to arrive. They accidentally phoned my emergency contact who is my (soon to be ex) husband. They had told him that it was a mistake calling him as they were trying to call me as I hadnt turned up for work.

I then arrived, started my meeting asap, and was told about this call to my husband later on, which I totally forgot about until I went home that evening.

When I was home, and after we had our dinner and was watching TV, it popped in my head.. I asked "my work said they called you today, why havent you said anything"
him: "oh, I forgot about that, something about you didnt turn up"
me: "yeah, but why didn't you try contacting me to make sure I was alright, I could have been in an accident"
him "I was busy at work, they were going to contact you"
me "I know, but werent you concerned? What if I had been in an accident, wouldnt you feel guilty??"
him: "I'm sure the police would have contacted me, had you been in an accident".

I dont think I have ever forgiven him for that comment. He wasnt in a great place at the time however he did not care, not one little bit.

What was your eureka moment?

x

Oh my word what a prize cunt. I'm sure you're much happier now.

Showing once again your complete and utter ignorance. That's exactly what many abusive men do otherwise v few women would marry them.

'The social status of being married' Oh for god sake. What century are you from? You're either from the Victorian era, a troll or a man.

Whatever, you're revealing a total lack of compassion and empathy.

Take a night off, it’s Friday. Have a bath and try to calm down.

@Eyerollcentral follow your own advice and add in a 🍷?

Thanks for your concern just having one babes

@Eyerollcentral excellent, hopefully you'll calm down and stop being obnoxious babe!

Haha. I'm calm sweetie. Can't resist coming back to the thread to congratulate yourself some more, can you pet?

@Stunningscreamer one of my first interactions was with you.....,

How many interactions have you had on this post?

Because you're batshit crazy sweetie!

But carry on with your madness, it's really quite amusing sweet-cheeks!

That's @Eyerollcentral, not @Stunningscreamer

Is there something wrong with you two?

No, have you ever looked to yourself?

I don’t think your DH did anything wrong.

It must be past your bed time, give mummy back her phone and have a great weekend!

Who is this directed at?

But in fairness, it's hilarious.

You need to do the @ to tag someone.

Sorry darling it’s to you @Squirespot, must be time for my own bed.

Yeah I reckon it is my lovely, night night.

Yup

Actually @Eyerollcentral most abusive men do start off being lovely in a relationship. They don’t show their true colours to start with. It’s usually a gradual process and decline.

Thanks for the info @Teaandtoast3, I’m a survivor of a coercive and controlling relationship with a man myself so rest assured I do know that. The thing is the OP here said her husband was a great guy in her initial post, as in the present tense is a great guy and gave an example of what was fairly innocuous behaviour as the reason she was ending her marriage. Given the background she presented, to me and the majority of others who initially posted, that seemed extremely rash as she had said he was a great husband. The OP later added more detail about his behaviour and I think I was amongst the first then to say actually this is not a good guy, he is an arsehole. The OP didn’t respond when I asked her was he like that before she married him.
I do object to being made out to be some kind of throwback to marriage means marriage for life. It’s the direct opposite of who I am and anyone who took the time to read my posts would see that. I have been targeted by a couple of individuals on this thread who have made absolutely wild projections from their incorrect readings of what I have said but thats MN isn’t it? I am sorry to have given such a detailed reply to your post but I felt it necessary. Enjoy your weekend

I’m very sorry you’ve had to go through that yourself. I was not targeting you myself, but I do realise I replied from a snippet of your conversation. I did not read the thread in its entirety. Just the start and the end mostly. Many apologies to you.

And I apologise profusely if you feel I was targeting you @Eyerollcentral

Ugh, another one picked up by the DM. Apologies for linking

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-11627577/Women-reveal-moment-knew-relationship-doomed.html

Please don’t apologise at all I know you weren’t at all!

Thank you @Eyerollcentral

And whoever the reporter is on this thread, you’ve got a bloody nerve and ought to be ashamed of yourself. It’s utterly abhorrent that you’ve published this. You have the morality of a teaspoon. I hope karma bites you in the arse.

Well you should know better then? Your "demand" for the OP to answer you is ridiculous , they can answer or not as they see fit?

I found your "babes" and all that crap disingenuous and inflammatory. Do you start all that in real life?