DH randomly masturbating

[Catladyy]

DH decided to cook an early tea for us and DS at DS' tea time (5pm). I thought we should just feed DS, who was already hungry, but DH said he'd do it quickly. 45 mins later, I take an angry baby to the kitchen to find DH has barely started. Later he revealed he'd actually just spent the time masturbating.

It feels like a really odd thing to do with a hungry baby in the next room. If he was that desperate (and out sex life is slow, but not that slow), why he couldn't just let me feed DS and slope off upstairs? Isn't it a bit of a weird urge to indulge at 5pm? But DH say's he's apologised and if I bring it up again, I'm 'shaming' him, which I have no right to do.

AIBU?

Are you sure it was Mayonnaise served with dinner?

The OP has said the child wasn’t crying.

Check his phone- he’s messaging someone

@CurlyhairedAssassin 'great' minds - lol

So you're saying he masturbated in the kitchen? Did he relieve himself in the kitchen sink?

Ok so if he'd fucked off to play on a games console? Sat reading a book? Watched a tv show on his phone? Instead of doing what he was meant to be doing. Not disgusting things but really selfish and self absorbed. Only he had a wank instead, so both.

Gross - no way would I have dinner that early.

Oh and ltb concerning the masturbating thing.

Yes don’t most people’s partners pretend they just went for their fifteenth shit of the day 😂

I'm glad your son wasn't wailing.

It does seem a strange time of day to do it....Hopefully NOT in the kitchen.

When the baby is hungry and screaming at 5pm

The baby wasn’t even crying, let alone screaming.

😂

IN THE KITCHEN!?

Okaaaay

🙈 Oh please , no!

Overexaggerators anonymous in full flow here

Man has wank - so what?

Obviously he should be able to cook a meal when he says he's going to instead of sloping off for the world's longest wank. Also, I think it's common manners not to masturbate in random parts of the house, especially with children around. From now on, I will take tremendous comfort from the fact that I can walk into my own kitchen at 5pm without wondering if I'm going to be met with the sight of my husband beating his meat next to the fridge freezer.

Gross 🤮
I'd be asking him to leave over that
Wrong and disgusting on so many levels
And selfish with a hungry baby too

There's a time and a place. This was neither.

I suppose it could have been worse he could have gone to the chippy for tea. (Imagine that happening in the queue!) Brings a whole new meaning to battered sausage mind.

Seriously though does he have impulse control issues or something?

Sorry but I laughed so hard at this I woke the baby, 🤣🤣🤣😉😂. What intrigues me is that he told OP that's what he was doing, rather than pretending to mend to toaster or other blah some chaps make up.

Did he sign up to some por# site or something,

Yes, I can't say I ever decided to have a wank instead of feeding a hungry baby.

Didn't know wanking in the kitchen was a thing!

And I'd always thought those white globules by the sink were from when the soap dispenser had been pressed down a little to forcefully! 😮

I'm really curious as to how the DH phrased this to the OP.

'Apologies, I was just masturbating.'
'I lost track of the time as I was having a wank.'
'I thought I'd knock a quick one out but it took longer than expected, sorry about that, love.'

Oh Jesus, the humanity! Could you not 😂