Am I just an ungrateful bitch?

[mumbojumbo7]

Been with DP a few months, our first Christmas. He can’t do enough for me and he’s so so lovely.
I absolutely love the little things, it’s something I’ve always said and he knows about me. I got him a pair of boots he really wanted, but I also filled a stocking of his favourite snacks and got a few little bits he really loved.

He knows I’m huge on little things too. And there’s lots of little things I have been pointing out such as ornaments for my room, types of (not expensive) jewellery I like, fave type of sweets etc etc.

He got me one big present, which was a piece of jewellery with my favourite flower on it, as well as a Prosecco glass as I accidentally broke one of mine.

It’s honestly really lovely, but he spent over £100 on this big present and I’ve never been huge on big sort of superficial gifts like that. I know I’d rather have £100 spent on lots of little things or something for us to do.

I am really grateful for it but I think I just worry that it means he doesn’t know me very well, or doesn’t listen.

Am I being a bitch? I haven’t said anything and obviously won’t, but just wanted to know if I’m being mean

If you wanted something specific you should have specified it.

He sounds like he’s put a lot of thought into this. Maybe you can get this little pieces of tat cheaper on the sales eh

Well quite. If you’d rather have a load of small gifts for the same money, fair enough. But how exactly is the one option more superficial than the other? It’s all arguably materialistic tat at the end of the day...

He sounds lovely and thoughtful. You sound ridiculous. Pull yourself together

Yes, you damn well are ungrateful

I'm sure you didn't say anything but you really are sounding a bit spoiled and huffy, not everybody gets the little present thing,give the guy a break.

He is your boyfriend. Not a partner. No he does not know you because it has been a few months. You come across very ungrateful. Referring to a gift as superficial and I suspect would be hurtful if he knew you thought that. Perhaps he considered it thoughtful. He spent more than I would of on a new relationship. You basically wanted a heap of stuff and didn't get it and this is somehow his fault?

YABVU. Poor guy.

YABU. I feel sorry for him. You sound like hard work.

And you don't need to be pointing out 'lots of little things' for your first Christmas with someone you've only been with a few months.

I think most people would prefer a decent piece of jewellery rather than £100 spent on various cheaper bits of this and that.

Unless you specifically discussed doing stocking for each other in don't think he could be expected to even consider doing one for you. Stockings are more normally done for children by their parents. I'd not do one for a boyfriend or visa versa. A nice piece of jewellery thought would be very much appreciated.

Wanting lots of tat instead of one decent present is not something most people are going to intuit, least of all if you’ve only known each other a few months.

If it’s SUCH a big deal to you - and it very clearly is, since you’ve come on here about it - you probably need to tell him for next time.

In the meantime, cheer up and try focusing on the positives of the situation - a couple of thoughtful gifts from someone you like and who likes you, for Christmas?

Wow

You’ve been with him a few months and this is your first Christmas. That is completely normal.

Most people would prefer a couple of well thought out gifts than £100 worth of cheap tat. Stop being such a diva

@mumbojumbo7
you’ve talked a lot about hinting to him about what you like and doing things for him that you like but what does he like? What did you do for him that was actually for him?

Yes, you are. He sounds lovely and thoughtful. I personally would far rather have one nice gift than lots of silly little things. Anyway, you gave him boots - I would hardly describe them as "little".

I’d much rather have a lovely, personal, specific piece of jewellery than a stocking full of sweets. Most grown ups would. He would have had no clue you wanted a stocking, like a child, instead. Or did you actually want both? You sound hard work.

Poor bloke will never be good enough for you.

Yes

Yes but you know you are so it's not all bad. 😂

Tbh if I met someone who did stockings, I'd train them out of it. Who wants to be looking for loads of bits and pieces for one of those things?

He gave you a thoughtful present (s). He probably didn't do the stocking thing as a kid or thinks it's for kids. Let it go.

this MUST be a reverse

You are being ridiculous! He sounds lovely. I hope he didn't pick up that you weren't happy

Don't be too hard on him. I'd have found that really sweet.

I think you already know the answer.

Christmas is about love, friendship and company. He thought very hard and got you a lovely gift.

Fwiw, though, I don't think you are a bitch.