I have name changed as to not to be outed.
My DH only has two days off - Thursday and Saturday.
He spends every single Wednesday night after work and the whole of Thursday with his mother. The pretext is that she's lost her husband and is ill and elderly and that no one else can take care of her on that day.
He has five other brothers.
He comes home at 11pm (or sometimes as late as 1am) on Thursday night. His mother keeps asking him to stay longer or ask him to get shopping for her late in the evening, rather than telling him to go home. My children are married and I would never dream of keeping them late at night with their wives waiting at home for them. At that point of the day I'm shattered and already in bed, and all the noise he makes when he comes in that late frankly disturbs my sleep. I need to be awake at 7am the next morning.
His excuse is that our children are all grown up and therefore he doesn't need to always be at home during the day. One of our kids still lives at home and the other ones live a few minutes away so he says they're company enough. He doesn't understand that I want interaction from someone my age, and that the relationship is completely different.
His other excuse is that he swapped Saturdays for Thursdays for me (Saturday is the only day off we have in common) and that Saturdays are date nights for us. He doesn't understand that one day a week is simply not enough. Especially when he works night shift and I work a 9 to 5.
I tried talking to his mother, who doesn't want to get involved. His brothers and SILs are all taking his side.
AIBU?