Is it inappropriate for an opposite sex teen/YA to share a hotel room with parent?

[MrsRobinsonsHandprints]

This was raised on another thread but isn't directly related to the thread so I don't think this is TAAT. Also if you read that thread please don't talk about it, this is a wider question than that situation.

Providing everyone gets on and is happy with it I don't think it is inappropriate for a parent to share a hotel room with their opposite sex child/Young adult. I would go further and say (again providing both sides are happy) that it isn't inappropriate to share with your child at any age.

YABU you shouldn't share with your older child

YANBU, it is a parent child relationship of course it isn't inappropriate.

What is the issue? Its not like they would be sharing a room at home. Its for a week at most I assume.

No its not a problem. Unless either party is getting their genitals out in front of the other, then it is no different to spending time together.

Lets stop sexualising normal, innocent relationships between family members. It's weird and the fact people's minds even go there is odd to me.

For the situation of overnight accommodation, it is inappropriate to have a parent sharing a bedroom with a teen DC, and even more inappropriate if the teen DC is of the opposite sex.

Has nothing to do with sex or inappropriate behaviour as posters are implying…it’s simply the situation warrants teen DC and parent(s) to have their own private bedroom.

14yo DD shared my bed with me over Xmas to fit everyone in.

ExH and DD16 go away for a hobby and share a twin bed room with no bother (other than his horrendous snoring )

On holiday this year again I shared a double bed with DD14 and dd16 and my friend had the 2 singles in the same room.

I'm genuinely baffled why this is wrong....

It's fine because you said everyone was happy with it.

If they weren't, then you'd have to find an alternative solution.

There is noway I would book an extra room at more expense so my older teens can have privacy for a temporary living situation. I regularly so away with my teens (female 17 and male 19) we always have a family room.

We all live in the house together, albeit we have our own rooms but seriously?

There's no harm caused simply by sharing a room or seeing a parent in their underwear. But it could provide an opportunity for sexual abuse. That only applies to a minority of families and they are probably not going to change based on a Mumsnet thread.

You haven't said what is inappropriate about it?

There is absolutely nothing inappropriate about it.

@Onnabugeisha

I'm still baffled about the 'situation'

I'm currently staying in a Premier Inn for 2 nights with my 18 year old son. Next week we are away for 4 nights, also in a Premier Inn
I always book a family or twin room so separate beds. We get changed in the bathroom. The only issue we have is who gets the double bed (I do)
If we didn't share we couldn't do half the things we do.
I just asked him if he minded sharing with me
Apparently only because I snore.

We will have to agree to disagree then.

A few posters have said about changing in front of teens etc. We tend to just be discreet, chamfering bathroom or I'll go back to room earlier as I take longer to get ready. Nothing uncomfortable or inappropriate.

@SnackSizeRaisin

If sexual abuse is an issue within a family, it will be happening in the family home.
There is nothing in a Premier Inn breakfast that is going to turn me into a sexual predator

Not sure how else to explain it.
Situation is you need overnight accommodation for yourself and teen DS.

Appropriate solution is private rooms
Inappropriate solution is sharing a room

its that simple.

But you haven't said what is inappropriate, maybe people will change their minds or understand if you actually say what it is. I just cannot think of what is inappropriate.

There is nothing in a Premier Inn breakfast that is going to turn me into a sexual predator

I should hope not! That would be zero stars on food hygiene if their breakfasts did.

I have said what it is? You’re just not understanding me.

As a one off I don't think it's inappropriate. DD (16), DP (her step Dad), toddler DD and I all shared a family room the night before we flew on holiday this summer. It was only one night at the airport hotel and saved us a few hundred after already spending thousands on the holiday itself (where teen DD had her own room for the week, of course). So for the sake of one night we all crammed into the one room and it was absolutely fine! PJs went on in the bathroom, really not an issue!

Share a bed or share a room? My daughter (17) has had flu and was feeling a bit tearful one night and asked to sleep with me.
I went away for a long weekend and slept in the same room with my son (19) and daughter.
Im not forcing anyone to do anything, and I'm sacrificing any privacy as much as they are @Onnabugeisha! Neither minded except both said I snore! I shared with my mother when we went away to a couple weddings when I was in my 30s, it would have seemed ridiculous to pay for separate rooms.
I'd definitely prefer separate beds though, more as it's crowded and hot and someone always hogs the duvet!

DS and I shared a room for 5 months when he was 11. I was hardly going to pay double and put him in a room alone when we went away when he was 13, rooms may not have even been available next to each other. We stayed in a b&b when he was 15, triple room, changed in bathroom, we both sleep in the same pyjamas we would sit together in the sitting room in in the evening. Camped for a weekend when he was 16 this summer, gave each other privacy for changing, then we were in pyjamas and jumpers in sleeping bags! No 'brave face' required.

Share a bed or share a room?

Share a bedroom- which is what a hotel is, bedroom with an en-suite.

I often share room with my DSs. They are 16 and 21. I travel for work a lot and they sometimes come and visit and stay in my hotel room. I also share a double bed with one of them when we visit my parents who live abroad and don’t have much space. I have never thought of that as inappropriate or sexual, just practical at times. I find it odd that anyone would and actually a bit inappropriate like they have some really strange thoughts in their own heads to think like that.

It depends on the teen!
Both my teens will happily share a bed with me or DH or both of us. They recently shared a double bed on holiday together. Not deliberate, they were supposed to have twin beds. But other than dd claiming that her little bro was too fidgety and he claiming that she snores, it was fine.

Sorry but that is infantilising for a 15/16yr old to share a bedroom with their parents. We did separate tents. And tents are cheap, you pay for the pitch anyway not the # of tents on it. So it’s no extra to have a few medium size tents instead of a big top family circus sized tent.

No, guess none of you have stayed in a backpackers hostel with mixed dorms!

It's just sleeping

I have actually & worse. But that’s due to necessity.

Of course it isn’t. It’s only sleeping. It’s not like they give him a dummy and help him to get dressed. Honestly I seriously think you have some major issues going on.