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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask for non-judgy advice? Buying clothes for obese DD

207 replies

christmassedout · 27/12/2022 18:13

DD8 is very overweight. We are aware and trying to tackle it.

I'm really struggling to find clothes that fit her. She needs age 9-10 for the length as she's also tall. Her belly is currently huge and out of proportion with the rest of her :( Age 9-10 jeans won't button up, but if I go up a few sizes to fit around the belly, they'll be too long and too big in the thighs, bum etc. She says elastic waistbands dig in and are too uncomfortable. Tops are less of an issue as she can just wear things very oversized, but I would like her to have some clothes that actually fit her properly.

Parents of overweight children, how do you find clothes to fit them?

OP posts:
TangoShoes · 27/12/2022 19:59

My DS was a big lad until he started playing football. I got a lot of his stuff from Sturdy Kids:
Sturdy Kids

cansu · 27/12/2022 20:03

I buy tunic style tops for dd from Joules which she wears with leggings.

Milkandhoneybees · 27/12/2022 20:04

You should try her in smock dresses or empire fit dresses. They are really in fashion at the moment and are available in lots of different styles.

www.next.co.uk/style/ls286008/p94037#p94037

www.next.co.uk/style/st785202/221621#221621

www.next.co.uk/style/ls325483/k15446#k15446

Zedcarz · 27/12/2022 20:10

LimeCheesecake · 27/12/2022 19:49

@Zedcarz - the OP has said they have bought the more generous / plus sized childrens leggings the next size up and they are still too small for her dd to wear comfortably.

OP - cropped leggings another size up might work, also hemming longer things rather than trying to find specialist ranges.

Yeah saw that after. There's loads of options, lots of great suggestions here.

I'm menstrual and a bit emosh at the moment but i know personally how much it affects kids when they just want to be like everyone else so has really pulled at my heartstrings reading about this girl.
Op please for the love of gods don't buy her clothes from websites named husky or sturdy kids.
I'm a short overweight person and can buy clothes anywhere that anyone else can, there's no reason your child can't be dressed from high street stores .

Petite ranges also start very small sizes so
unless there's something youre not telling us, you just need to understand what sizes correlate with her measurements and shop accordingly, from whatever department caters best, making minor length alterations where necessary.

habiller · 27/12/2022 20:13

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ.

lochmaree · 27/12/2022 20:14

sorry haven't RTFT but have you tried etsy/handmade clothes?

I just started making kids clothes and from what I've made so far it would be relatively easy to adjust patterns to make suitably sized clothes so I'm sure there's someone out there who could do it.

LJAKS · 27/12/2022 20:21

Handmade insta shops that do made to measure for the special occasions. I've used maybedaisy and button&loop in the past for made to measure dresses for my 8yo. She's tall and nothing to her so everything was too short or drowned her so she needed proper tailored things. We live for adjustable waists too I don't know if those work both ways.

lookslikeabombhitit · 27/12/2022 20:22

If you're after leggings I'd go down the hand made route as plenty of patterns offer larger sized options (waves and wild is one off the top of my head) and tailors/seamstresses/wfh sewists can usually skillfully grade the patterns to fit your daughter's measurements. At least that way she has some bottoms that fit, that she can pick the fabric for and that help her fit in with her friends without being oversized everywhere else.

You'll know this but remember you can't out exercise a bad diet (seeing other replies on here saying that a bit of exercise will sort it out- it won't). I hope you find something for her that she loves to wear. X

eatdrinkandbemerry · 27/12/2022 20:23

I've got a really skinny 8 year old so have tried loads of different clothing brands.
Tesco clothing always seems to be big fitting around the waist and very generous sizing in dresses.
I'd definitely stay away from denim as unless your perfectly in proportion jeans dont look good x

Original poster
christmassedout · 27/12/2022 20:24

I totally get what some posters are saying about her growing out of it, I wish that was the case. She's gained a lot of weight this year and it's definitely down to a poor diet. She's visibly struggling carrying the extra weight. A massive pot belly on an 8 year old isn't just puppy fat.

I do think she gets bloated often, her belly is often bigger and firmer at the end of the day. She hasn't been tested for intolerances but I will look into it.

OP posts:
LimeCheesecake · 27/12/2022 20:27

If she needs aged 9-10 leg length, then adult petite ranges will be too long, it’s the leg length of aged 13-14 clothes and most shops the girls aged 13-14 is about a size 6, boys range works out at about a size 8. (Am petite and when slimmer used to buy from kids ranges).

if you do buy from sturdy ranges - cut the tags out. Hopefully this will be a one season problem and by the summer her weight will be more in proportion with her height.

Zedcarz · 27/12/2022 20:37

lookslikeabombhitit · 27/12/2022 20:22

If you're after leggings I'd go down the hand made route as plenty of patterns offer larger sized options (waves and wild is one off the top of my head) and tailors/seamstresses/wfh sewists can usually skillfully grade the patterns to fit your daughter's measurements. At least that way she has some bottoms that fit, that she can pick the fabric for and that help her fit in with her friends without being oversized everywhere else.

You'll know this but remember you can't out exercise a bad diet (seeing other replies on here saying that a bit of exercise will sort it out- it won't). I hope you find something for her that she loves to wear. X

Of course you can't exercise out a bad diet but you can introduce a love of healthy and fun physical activity and a side effect will be seeing changes to body shape, increased energy etc and a desire to keep this up .
Dd is young enough that subtle changes to lifestyle can have a lifelong impact on physical and mental health.
New fashionable clothes that fit and suit at current size and weight will also make a huge difference, looking in the mirror and receiving complements etc will all go towards wanting to keep it up

Willowswood · 27/12/2022 20:37

christmassedout · 27/12/2022 20:24

I totally get what some posters are saying about her growing out of it, I wish that was the case. She's gained a lot of weight this year and it's definitely down to a poor diet. She's visibly struggling carrying the extra weight. A massive pot belly on an 8 year old isn't just puppy fat.

I do think she gets bloated often, her belly is often bigger and firmer at the end of the day. She hasn't been tested for intolerances but I will look into it.

I think you should go back to the GP, this really doesn't seem like normal obesity. You describe her belly as being huge and it sounds like that's mainly the problem. Maybe they need to look into it a bit more

Original poster
christmassedout · 27/12/2022 20:39

LimeCheesecake · 27/12/2022 20:27

If she needs aged 9-10 leg length, then adult petite ranges will be too long, it’s the leg length of aged 13-14 clothes and most shops the girls aged 13-14 is about a size 6, boys range works out at about a size 8. (Am petite and when slimmer used to buy from kids ranges).

if you do buy from sturdy ranges - cut the tags out. Hopefully this will be a one season problem and by the summer her weight will be more in proportion with her height.

This is what I thought too. She's tried on older DSDs' petite adult clothes and they're too long for her, she's about 140cm. I like the idea of cutting the tags out.

OP posts:
2023willbemyyear · 27/12/2022 20:39

I would hit USA eBay and have a look there as there are a lot of overweight kids in the USA that their shops are more likely to stock clothes with bigger waists. You only need to get enough until the summer if you're getting it under control, so may be worth taking the time in learning the art of modifying a few items yourself- I would learn how they create maternity waistbands and modify some trousers than she likes with a similar waistband. The weight can fall off her in no time with the right diet and exercise, as kids' metabolisms are way faster than ours.

Dixiechickonhols · 27/12/2022 20:43

I was going to say USA ranges - via eBay (or if you know anyone going on holiday)
Justice is very popular with tween girls and has a full plus size range.

OhBeAFineGuyKissMe · 27/12/2022 20:45

Boys clothes are often a more generous fit and for cargo pants and joggers the look is very similar.

Lilliflip · 27/12/2022 20:47

OhBeAFineGuyKissMe · 27/12/2022 20:45

Boys clothes are often a more generous fit and for cargo pants and joggers the look is very similar.

If no leggings will fit what about joggers with a large tshirt? My DD’s friends all wear big loose t-shirts, hoodies, and I was going to say boys’ junior sizes are bigger than girls.

Original poster
christmassedout · 27/12/2022 20:48

She would definitely be overweight without the excess belly. She's been overweight for a couple of years, she's just gained a lot more weight this year and it all seems to be belly. I don't think it's just bloating though.

OP posts:
FancyFran · 27/12/2022 20:48

Just a thought, my dd was only 10 when she reached puberty. Be vigilant. I am obese but sew so I would be adjusting things. I am assuming it is just home clothes she needs? I have a very tall son and bought loads of Raplh Lauren off ebay. They do every size.

jamimmi · 27/12/2022 20:50

Hi OP have.you had a chat with your GP re the weight gain just to make sure it is food related. A hard swollen belly may not actually be weight if her limbs are slim. DD often had a very swollen abdomen she's ceoliac which is the cause and she's gone form swollen tender tummy to flat in 6 months she is older though. You sound like.a very caring mum who wants the best for her

TooManyPlatesInMotion · 27/12/2022 20:54

Get trousers that fit her round the middle and take the length up. If you go for some "slouchy fit" jeans/trousers then you may not need to take much up - depending on the style of the jeans, they can look quite cool rolled up with some funky socks.

NoDairyNoProblem · 27/12/2022 21:03

DD has a friend at school who struggles with her weight (age 10) and I know her mum likes Nike (extended sizes) as 5-10cm more around the waistband but same leg length, M&S plus for uniform and favours dresses with snag tights shortest length.

Original poster
christmassedout · 27/12/2022 21:08

I like the idea of getting her a couple of dresses etc from Etsy. One of the occasions we have coming up is late January, so she won't have lost the weight by then :( She's often not keen on dresses and skirts for day to day, but she might be more open to dresses like someone linked up the thread at the moment as she's getting more frustrated with clothes.

There may be some bloating issues, I have noticed her belly often looks bigger in the evenings. But it's not a hard swollen tummy, it's definitely loose fat. She's spent a lot of this month with her dad and I was quite shocked when he dropped her back today :(

OP posts:
AuditAngel · 27/12/2022 21:10

DD2 is heavy, she’s now 12. She and DS have their dad’s body shape. DD1 is 5’7” and a size 4-6

I found H&M generous fit worked for my two, although the website does not make them easy to find, I found searching “generous fit” worked best. M&S and George also do plus fit but it isn’t as generous.

DD2 now fits into petite ranges and I find careful shopping in Primark can work, but she is 150cm so fits ladies wear now.

I find DD2 still wants snacks so we aim for more protein, less junk. She’s been ill recently and the weight has fallen off, now need to keep it off. She’s already active with 2 hours of dancing twice a week and an hour and a half of karatetwice a week.