To have been entitled over Xmas sleeping arrangements

[EntitledIthink]

Staying with PIL over Christmas. 3 bedrooms and 7 adults.

Obviously PIL stay in their own bedroom which leaves a spare room with a double bed, spare with a single bed and sofa bed in living room (which is horrendously uncomfortable).

I have pushed for us to have the double spare bed and:

BIL 1 have single spare bedroom which to me makes sense because there’s one of him and it seems madness that it was a possibility he’d get a double while a couple share a single.

BIL 2 and SIL get awful sofa bed. I feel guilty about this because if I don’t want to sleep there, why should they?

Normally I go with the flow and usually get a raw deal but I’m 7 months pregnant and can barely sleep as it is and the thought of that uneven, springy bed for 4 nights makes me not want to go.

Good point OP, has anyone actually objected?

This!

Ha ha! - same here

There has to be some compromising but the solution partly is a more comfortable sofa bed or air mattress

At which point, it would be obvious how little respect you had for my wife, we'd leave.

So what us the situation?

Are BIL and SIL trying to claim the bed? Have PILs allocated it to them? Does your DH not agree?

What’s actually happening?

No way would I spend 4 nights on a terrible bed when pg. Does it have to be 4 nights?

Ask if you can have any bed except the sofa bed as you need the support.

Common sense then dictates you are in the double, but I would also accept the single with dh on the floor if necessary.

I would’ve stayed at home.

7 months pregnant is a good enough reason to say this year you will be at home but family are welcome to visit.

Maybe she doesn’t want to stay home?

What are you not understanding here?

Can nobody just have a conversation and tell the parents that the sofa bed is uncomfortable and everyone chip in some money for a high aerobed? They’re more comfortable than real beds.

Why are you posting? Have you been told you've been entitled? Has it caused a problem?

So one other couple have a double, one single man have another double and the ops partner gets the floor? How does that logic work??

I'm 38 weeks pregnant and could sleep anywhere, so I don't think it's reason enough in itself unless you have any pregnancy-related issues.

I feel like next time you'll ask for the best option again as you'll have a child, and so it continues. So I'd say coin toss is best for the doubles.

Obviously, the single person takes the single room.

Obv.

But the statement "everyone is child free" will not be true. Next year some of them will be child free. Next year some of them will not be childfree. There's not "everyone" is childfree.

Id be wanting the single bed at 7 months pregnant and a peaceful night on my own! DH and his brother can fight for the sofa bed 😄

I've been in a similar situation with the crap mattress in the living room. I simply told DH that next year I was booking into the PI about a mile down the road. He was worried that SIL might be upset, but actually she seemed relieved.

As an adult, I simply can't see what's wrong with saying that you're booking into a hotel, rather than sleeping somewhere uncomfortable.

No, I don't think you are being unreasonable by being direct. Has anyone suggested you are?

Definitely consider how to manage in future, with a child in the mix. Comfier sofa bed, blow up bed, staying in a Premier Inn or Airbnb....

Because it's Xmas. Pretty common for everyone to stay over on Xmas day. If you book a hotel you have to pay for a taxi on top (lovely expensive Xmas fare) or can't drink so you can drive!

7 month pregnant lady absolutely should not be sleeping on the sofa bed when there's a proper bed available. Not unreasonable at all.

This happened to us one year. We were allocated the sofa bed in the lounge and at the time I didn't care or even think about it. It was rubbish though. I was 8 months pregnant and already had a toddler who woke us up at the crack of dawn every day of the year. Sleeping in the living room meant we had to be the last to bed and the first up everyday, and also had the faff of packing all our stuff off upstairs every day so it wasn't everywhere. On reflection I wish I had anticipated all of this in advance and wish I'd have pushed for my dsis and bil to have the sofa bed so we could have the spare bedroom.

On the other hand, it’s immensely irritating to know that because you’re the single, childfree one you’re always expected to go on the sofa or a floor.

If you're the type of people who would deny a pregnant woman a bed, I doubt anybody would be queuing up for an invite TBH.

No, it would be pretty much guaranteed that the OP wouldn’t bother going.

Good lawd Id have booked a travel lodge