She kept reiterating it was ok if we didn’t go

[Whenwillthissicknessend]

Am I being paranoid?

Christmas mums and kids meet up today, fairly small group, organised by a newish mum. Dd has been not feeling great and I said in the last couple of days that she’d been not that well, but we wanted to come and would try to make it. Other friends in the group saying they were sad she was unwell and they hoped to see us etc.
The mum who organised it just kept saying ‘Don’t worry not to be there’ and saying she didn’t expect us to be there and saying the numbers now were such and such, basically not including us.
Am I being paranoid in thinking she didn’t really want us there?

I wouldn’t be taking an unwell child to see a new baby.

She probably doesn't want to get sick?! Did you explain what she was ill with?

No one wants a cold right now. It’s not personal.

It was a polite way of saying “don’t bring your kid if she’s ill, we don’t want to be ill”

You've been uninvited because your daughter's feeling unwell. It's pretty obvious really.

Why would you want to take your dd if she's unwell? Have all her symptoms passed now?

No you aren't being paranoid, but you are being selfish taking a sick child to a group and allowing her to spread her germs...

Obviously the others are just being polite.

Of course she doesn't want to mix with a sick person a week before Xmas.

I'd say yes because it's ruder to say "Please don't come" so she's couched it in emphasising that you don't need to be there - rightly so because no-one wants to risk themselves or kids getting sick ever especially not so close to Christmas. Unless there's a massive backstory in which she organised a trip for all the group to attend Disneyland but 'forgot' to mention it to you I wouldn't take this personally.

She didn’t want you to take a sick kid. Obviously. Did you go?

Good grief, she's politely telling you not to bring your sick kid to a gathering just before Christmas!

I wouldn’t want you there if she was sick this close to Christmas either tbh.

No one wants to have a sick child round the week before Christmas!

I hate it when people hosting something won’t let up the pressure if you say you can’t/might not be able to attend.

I only want people who genuinely want to come if I’m hosting and not out of a sense of duty.

So if someone is doubtful, I like to make it abundantly clear that the decision is entirely up to them. It has never occurred to me that this could be misconstrued, but I suppose it could.

Or she could be one of those people who hate not being given a firm answer.

I don’t know if you’re right, but safer to keep your child away if she’s been ill.

You will have to wait for another time to see if it happens again.

What's not to understand? Your child is not well and you really must not go to the gathering with sick child!
She's just being overly polite and you're not paranoid, just unable to apply some common sense frankly.

No one wants your sick child there ! It's not personal .. why are people so weird about sickness! It's Christmas ffs and everyone wants to stay well!

I agree with the others, she is hinting for you not to bring your child and spread her germs.

My kids sick, but I’ll bring her along anyway.

No you’re not being paranoid, you’re expected to bow out. Read the room

I wouldn't want your sick child there either, I highly suspect none of them do but none want to be the one to say it. Let us say it for you- don't go!

If you or your child is ill then you limit contact with others as much as possible.

She doesn’t want you to feel pressured to come when your dd is ill.
They sound like a nice group of friends; showing their sympathy.

Dont be paranoid that they don’t like you!

Dont take your dd if she’s unwell- not fair on anybody.

Everyone is mindful that a few very contagious infections are rife at the moment, and have plans for Christmas.

Its sensible to avoid mixing with illness where possible.

Of course she doesn't want you to bring a sick child to an event a week before Xmas

Last thing anyone wants at Xmas is to be around a sick child!!!

I don’t think you’re paranoid but I’m surprised you’re surprised she may be politely letting you know your DD’s germs aren’t welcome just before Christmas.

If your kid is I’ll keep them away from others. It’s not fair to spread germs.