Page 14 | To think I should have to look after her sick child?

Crunchycooki · 2022-12-07T18:08:22+00:00

My friend asked if I could pick her child up from nursery as she’s working a long shift. I agreed. Got to the nursery today and they told me her mum dropped her off saying she is sick, so if they need to call they can call her. They tried calling all day and no answer from her even though I’ve spoken to her today. Shes now at my house, very chesty, she’s been sick, she’s falling asleep and says her tummy hurts. I have a younger child and we have just gotten over a horrible week of illness. Mum doesn’t finish work until 9 tonight despite my texts to say she needs to pick her up as she’s not well she apparently can’t leave 😡

CrazyLadie · 09/12/2022 13:31

DonnaBanana · 07/12/2022 19:42

Some of you lot need to wind your necks in with your unhelpful middle class opinions. That poor mum might be close to losing her job and need it to keep a roof over her kids head. She’s hardly living la vida loca if she has to work a twelve hour shift.. That is not going to be an easy job whatever it is. It’s all easy to judge when you’re sitting pretty with your DH and middle class office job

I am notO middle class or nor do I have a DHe, disabled single Mum with limited support near me and under no circumstances is it OK to ignore your childcare provider. Its tough when kids get ill but they have to always come first especially when ill. Also if in the UK there are laws which cover parental leave for illness etc

eastegg · 09/12/2022 13:55

DonnaBanana · 07/12/2022 19:42

Some of you lot need to wind your necks in with your unhelpful middle class opinions. That poor mum might be close to losing her job and need it to keep a roof over her kids head. She’s hardly living la vida loca if she has to work a twelve hour shift.. That is not going to be an easy job whatever it is. It’s all easy to judge when you’re sitting pretty with your DH and middle class office job

Stop making assumptions. How do we know the woman isn’t MC herself? 12 hour shifts don’t preclude it being a ‘middle class’ job. And you certainly can’t assume everyone criticising her is MC.

T1Dmama · 09/12/2022 17:00

How have things been since ? Would love to know that alls well?

Original poster

Crunchycooki · 09/12/2022 17:52

Hello,

My son was sick the early hours of this morning, he had a temperature that I could bring down with nurofen. He’s been up and down since so hopefully he’s better for Monday. Luckily I could work from home today so could juggle that with him.

i did text my friend to say my son had what her daughter had. No reply. He could have this from anywhere so can’t really point fingers.

OP posts:

Blondeshavemorefun · 09/12/2022 18:35

So she didn’t even reply to say sorry your ds was poorly

she is a shit friend. Sorry

MibsXX · 09/12/2022 18:40

CrazyLadie · 09/12/2022 13:21

It sure is hard work for a single parent to handle everything on their own, I know I have struggled at times but I have NEVER ignored a call from nursery, school or anybody who was looking after him. Jobs are important but yer kids health is more important. Also in the UK there are laws covering parental leave

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Those UK laws, mean absolutely nothing if you've got less than two years service in.. you can be fired any reason at all so long as they choose their words carefully so as not to break any discrimination laws ( they decide your childcare issues interfere with your job, so they state you didn't pass probation, or something neutrally similar on record or you missed shifts) this then precludes you from getting benefit help for quite some time whilst the jobcentre decide losing your job was your own fault.. in the meantime, rent, bills and food are not paid for. We don't know this poor woman's situation, but the fact she is out working says a lot about her IMO, many choose not to. This entire thread and one person's reaction to a possible train of thought from my own experience, has convinced me never to post on here again. Twice now I have had such a nasty reply to a post I have made I simply won't put myself through that again. Life is tough enough without someone putting the boot in more.I am sorry to hear your little one is poorly OP , so glad you are not totally pointing the finger at your friend, there are indeed a lot of bugs going around. You did a very good thing, and hopefully she will feel able to mention sickness should she get caught in this situation again, either with you or another friend. I come here to read threads for advice, companionship, to not feel so alone and desperate myself, but lately, and the replies on this thread have been the worst ever, there has been such vitriol shown and so little empathy, little wonder that suicide rates are climbing and god help the people in this country with views such as some shown here. I wish everyone the best Christmas they can have and hope life gets better for all of us next year, maybe the moods will lighten a tad.

girlmom21 · 09/12/2022 18:45

Crunchycooki · 09/12/2022 17:52

Hello,

My son was sick the early hours of this morning, he had a temperature that I could bring down with nurofen. He’s been up and down since so hopefully he’s better for Monday. Luckily I could work from home today so could juggle that with him.

i did text my friend to say my son had what her daughter had. No reply. He could have this from anywhere so can’t really point fingers.

That text is pointing fingers though, isn't it.

BatshitBanshee · 09/12/2022 18:54

Crunchycooki · 09/12/2022 17:52

Hello,

My son was sick the early hours of this morning, he had a temperature that I could bring down with nurofen. He’s been up and down since so hopefully he’s better for Monday. Luckily I could work from home today so could juggle that with him.

i did text my friend to say my son had what her daughter had. No reply. He could have this from anywhere so can’t really point fingers.

If your friend doesn't even send a "oh no! Hope he feels better soon!" in the very least then I would bin her off. Breaks her bollix to communicate with you when it concerns what she needs but couldn't be bothered to respond to you? She's a manipulative CF.

That text is pointing fingers though, isn't it.

ODFOD. It doesn't take an epidemiologist to deduce that an extended period of time in the company of one sick child will actually make another sick, even with a mum in the middle antibac-ing everything.

That text is stating a fact and not unusual for one parent to send another - usually the recipient is decent enough to say "oh no! DD had the worst of it on day 2, hope they're over it soon! Text if you need anything". Ya know, especially since parent 1 went out of their way to care for the sick kid in the first place.

girlmom21 · 09/12/2022 18:58

@BatshitBanshee I don't need to fuck off dear, thanks. Your expected response to the text proves my point. It's absolutely pointing fingers.

I'm not saying that's not where the OP's son has caught it from, but that you can't send someone that text then claim you don't want to point fingers.

been and done it. · 09/12/2022 19:25

ButterCrackers · 07/12/2022 21:09

Best to alert someone official who is able to assess the situation and get help if needed.

Dear Lord ...mum has been a cheeky fucker..end of..up to OP if she is prepared to help out again.

been and done it. · 09/12/2022 19:28

BloodyShoes · 07/12/2022 22:35

So even if the little girl wasn't sick, who was meant to have her from nursery shutting to 9pm?

The OP.

BatshitBanshee · 09/12/2022 19:40

girlmom21 · 09/12/2022 18:58

@BatshitBanshee I don't need to fuck off dear, thanks. Your expected response to the text proves my point. It's absolutely pointing fingers.

I'm not saying that's not where the OP's son has caught it from, but that you can't send someone that text then claim you don't want to point fingers.

The fact that you think it's "pointing fingers" tells anyone exactly what kind of person you are.

girlmom21 · 09/12/2022 20:24

@BatshitBanshee one who can read 😂

Elisi · 09/12/2022 20:25

Getting the strongest impression that we're only getting part of the whole story here.

Mummytobaby · 09/12/2022 21:32

MibsXX · 09/12/2022 18:40

Those UK laws, mean absolutely nothing if you've got less than two years service in.. you can be fired any reason at all so long as they choose their words carefully so as not to break any discrimination laws ( they decide your childcare issues interfere with your job, so they state you didn't pass probation, or something neutrally similar on record or you missed shifts) this then precludes you from getting benefit help for quite some time whilst the jobcentre decide losing your job was your own fault.. in the meantime, rent, bills and food are not paid for. We don't know this poor woman's situation, but the fact she is out working says a lot about her IMO, many choose not to. This entire thread and one person's reaction to a possible train of thought from my own experience, has convinced me never to post on here again. Twice now I have had such a nasty reply to a post I have made I simply won't put myself through that again. Life is tough enough without someone putting the boot in more.I am sorry to hear your little one is poorly OP , so glad you are not totally pointing the finger at your friend, there are indeed a lot of bugs going around. You did a very good thing, and hopefully she will feel able to mention sickness should she get caught in this situation again, either with you or another friend. I come here to read threads for advice, companionship, to not feel so alone and desperate myself, but lately, and the replies on this thread have been the worst ever, there has been such vitriol shown and so little empathy, little wonder that suicide rates are climbing and god help the people in this country with views such as some shown here. I wish everyone the best Christmas they can have and hope life gets better for all of us next year, maybe the moods will lighten a tad.

Show quote history

exactly.

JoanOfAllTrades · 10/12/2022 06:37

Crunchycooki · 09/12/2022 17:52

Hello,

My son was sick the early hours of this morning, he had a temperature that I could bring down with nurofen. He’s been up and down since so hopefully he’s better for Monday. Luckily I could work from home today so could juggle that with him.

i did text my friend to say my son had what her daughter had. No reply. He could have this from anywhere so can’t really point fingers.

It was absolutely disgusting that she didn’t leave work, but what’s done is done.

I’m going into nanna/nurse overdrive.

Please make sure that the little one gets plenty of fluids, plenty of sleep and fruit if he wants to eat.

The general rule for a bog-standard cold always used to be 2/3 days coming, 2/3 days starting, 2/3 days going, so if he’s been ill since last night and you had the sick child on the 7th (?) then it would seem as if he did pick it up from her.

Unfortunately, antibacterial wipes, dettol, etc., whilst good for surfaces, cannot make the air clean and ideally, you would have opened the windows at that time, to allow for airflow through. Also, with having the heating on, that allows bacteria to multiply and when someone coughs or sneezes, droplets get suspended in the air and I’ll get that your little one is just about the right height to have breathed some in. And his immune system won’t be as robust as yours, especially if he’s been sick himself recently.