Anyone else just want to weep?

[CrapBucket]

I don't have time or energy for anything, am I the only one?

Home is a disaster- I have lost control of the basics like meals (although I'm always at bloody lidl or aldi or asda), laundry, walking the dog....

Behind on everything at work, need to delegate stuff and don't have time to explain anything properly to anyone

Teens are being really meh about everything and need me to set the tone of the family - I just don't have the mental energy

My friends need me and I'm flaking on them left right and centre

Parents want to know what kids want for Christmas.

Can someone please pause the world? Just want to crawl under duvet but then tomorrow will be even further behind.

Obviously I need to stop wasting time on mums net too.

Waaaaaaahhhhh

@LaurelGrove

Bless you x thank you x

Everyone seems to be having it particularly rough this year it seems and one thing I don’t have to contend with is young children so I suppose I’m kind of lucky in that regard - I don’t know how all you current Mums do it - you rock x

I was looking into the sick day policy for my new contract as I know other staff get 20 days 100% pay. Yep. SSP for us fixed term zero hour losers, £0 for the first 3 days so even though I feel like absolute shit, shivering, feverish with a UTI that’s lingered for 7 days despite ABs and has now progressed to pissing blood again, even though I’ve had no days off since July, I still have to go into the fucking office tomorrow.

Joining the waaaah crew from my unhygienic misery pit.

That's a fuck ton of shit to deal with.

Oh God, four out of the last six weekends someone has been puking or feverish. Everything is chaos! I'm ready to retire

Oh yes
forgot I also have a UTI, blood in urine. I’ve missed two hospital appointments and have permanent lower stomach ache.

I"ve got 20 posts down and literally no-one has said "Where is your OH in all of this?"

It's not the world, it's your relationships. PLEASE don't repeat generational misogyny - if you do all the shitwork, so will your daughters .

@WinterDeWinter some of us don't have OHs.
Mind you, the one I had was fucking useless. I'd be posting the same stuff if he were still around.

Well, at least you're not repeating intergenerational misogyny .

You're right, I should have said 'if you're in a couple'. Single parenting is very hard work.

Setting the tone of the family is bloody hard work -especially with teenagers. Mine are older now and it does get easier.

It doesn’t work for everybody but whenever I start to feel like this I try to simplify everything that I can. Make the same meals over and over again, have a massive declutter, go through my diary to see what can possibly be cut out, let family sort things out for themselves (within reason). Hope you’re feeling back to normal soon, being overwhelmed and burning out is the worst x

Yep, all on my lonesome here. It’s a tough gig. One of my DCs seems to be in a better place after a terrible, terrible year of MH issues, but the other is still in his cave.
Where’s a fairy godmother when you need one?

It's strange so many people are feeling like this. I only have one adult dd so I've no excuse but I feel the way you're all describing and so do people I know.
Could it be some kind of mental exhaustion due to the pandemic? Cost of living crisis? And the cold weather on top?

I’m sick of everything right now. The bloody school run, the ridiculous messages from school everyday, all the demands of everyone on me, the huge pile of washing building up as it’s so hard to dry it all right now, all the worrying news headlines…the last month of sickness.

id like just to have a nice break to myself but sadly that won’t happen. I’m tired and fed up. I do enjoy things and am looking forward to xmas….I got excited wrapping some presents but then ran out of steam and feel depressed at the remaining huge amounts of wrapping I need to do.

I wanted to cry when I saw how much I’d spent on presents recently. I have so many people to buy for. In recent times I’ve just seen xmas as more and more materialistic but with the cost of living crisis I just feel a bit numb about how much I’m spending on xmas this year. I can afford it but who knows if I’ll be able to next year.

It’s time of year it’s so dark and miserable. There’s only so many hours so if you spend time doing Xmas stuff it means some other household task isn’t done. All the extras like work Christmas meal, school events when you can’t be bothered. Laundry seems never ending my daughter says it’s because she wears layers?!
How old are teens? Can they walk dog, cook easy meals.
I’d cut right back on effort. Pizza for tea etc.
Presents can the teens do email with Amazon links or suggest money.
It will be better when it’s lighter.

I often wonder this too, particularly when changing the duvet cover (my least favourite chore). Where is the spouse societal expectations promised me?!

I sometimes think about marrying someone just so I don’t have to do all the shit work myself but then realise I’m not looking for a DP, I’m looking for Mary Poppins

I thought I’d master it by getting a cleaner for 2 hours a week but I still have to frantically tidy up and they just go round things, so I think I’m going to have to sack them. AIBU?

omg this is my thread! I'm sooo exhausted beyond belief. 2 children under 3, youngest is going through a regression and hasn't slept more than an hour in weeks. I'm so chronically tired and breastfeeding is zapping the remainder of energy from me. both kids have colds so up coughing all night. house is a complete state but I feel so overwhelmed that I don't know where to begin, because after all it's enivitable it'll get messy straight away again..I would blame the kids but it's me too.

getting out to baby classes should be a luxury especially after first child was born in lockdown but they're also feeling more like another chore lately.

boss keeps trying to contact me about kit days but I don't want to do any. I want a new job thats less than a 2 hour commute but am doubting myself and feel it'll be a challenge finding anything I can do.

I'm in bed at 9.30 for the first time in many years.

Good night

@WinterDeWinter - problem is, DD sees her stepmother doing the same old crap, and sees me do everything because who else will sort out car insurance/put up curtains/take the tortoise to the vet/collect the neighbourhood's egg boxes to take to the food bank (just going down my to do list here...) if not me. So despite my best efforts I think all she's learned is that women can actually do everything, rather than that a fair division of labour is the way forward.

My dh pulls his weight and we have a cleaner and we’re still struggling. I think these days with kids and two full time careers it’s just all too much. We might as well not have a cleaner as the house is a mess an hour after she had been.

Does anyone else get the fear that just as one thinks things can’t get any worse the Universe goes “hold my beer” ?

I am now sole POA for my MIL - advanced dementia- in a care home - stopped recognising us about two years ago and is a bit of a distance away so not easy for me to visit and the staff are brilliant and understanding and keep me in the loop.

This morning the care home number flashed up on my phone and my heart fell into my boots - I usually ring them for updates, they call if it’s a crisis.

Fortunately they just needed consent for a flu jab.

I was practically hysterical with relief.

This afternoon my very frail FIL came to see me at my shop. He is divorced from MIL and has a lovely second wife he’s been with for over 20 years. I consider them family.

They’d come down this weekend for a flying visit and to go to a friends party. Nothing wild - they’re in their 80s.

Poor second wife went down a step awkwardly at the party and spent today in A&E as she has damaged both ankles. She’s the driver and they’ve had to organise all sorts to go home tomorrow which I can’t help with as I don’t drive. Am currently waiting for confirmation of what she’s actually done as she was still at A&E an hour ago having rocked up at lunchtime.

FIL nearly lost his wedding ring in my shop but we found it.

Irony is when they came for a holiday down here not long after DPs funeral, FIL broke his ankle on the first day at the holiday park.

beginning to think we’re all cursed.

Or I should write a book titled “You couldn’t make this shit up”……

Sorry for thread hogging - just very cathartic getting it all out….. and healthier than putting a straw into a bottle of vodka…..

Re “what shall I get the kids for Christmas?”, I always say tracksuit bottoms or a hoodie or a t- shirt. They can never have too many of those.

Me too. Life is shit.

@Unforgettablefire - it's all of the above. COVID, cost of living, war in Ukraine and the planet is burning, the thought of which actually does keep me awake at night. It's a lot (as my friends and I remind ourselves from time to time).

My oh spent all day Sunday replacing the saniflow unit in our bathroom that decided to pack up and stop the toilet from draining, he lost most of his day to that. He spent all day today home with the kids so I could work. As a result he's having to go in at 7am tomorrow. He's doing his best too, with the same rotten cold and cough that I have. And he picked up everything without a murmur when I was so sick with covid that I couldn't get out of bed. He's just reached his limit too. The endless sickness and demands on time and things which need to be done are breaking us both I think. The kids go to bed and we just look at each other in exhaustion at the moment. I'm counting down the days til I finish for Christmas tbh, I'm desperate for a break, and so is he.

And if I get one more sodding letter from the school about a Christmas event that they just need a jumper/outfit/headwear/donation for I think I might actually scream.

You are definitely not the only one. Your point about setting the tone for teenagers really resonated with me.
I've struggled since lockdown, so brought in help (cleaner, gardener, dog walker -
I recognise I'm fortunate to be able to afford this)
But I still have no energy, I'm burnt out menopausal and exhausted.
I don't want my kids to think this is 'me' I want them to remember the (single) mum who always took them out and cared for their every need. Not the mum they now have.
So I have no answers, sorry. But showing solidarity,
and hoping we all get some normal life back soon.
Good luck OP