Not to feel comfortable with DH putting cameras up all over the house?

[Iwantyourmidnights]

Please help settle a debate between DH and I.

We have a toddler DS who does lots of the usual adorable/funny/unexpected things, and DH keeps talking about installing cameras in every room in the house so that we can capture all of the funny candid moments. For example today he did something funny with our cat in our bedroom while I was getting dressed, I told DH about it and straight away he said 'this is why we should have cameras up!'.

I do kind of get where he's coming from, DS is his first child, he's an absolutely doting father and he loves taking and watching videos of him and watching him grow up. However, I've just started mat leave and before that worked from home full time. I said to him that I wouldn't feel comfortable knowing I was being filmed all day long when I'm at home alone. Especially in our bedroom where we sleep/get dressed/sometimes enjoy, ahem, private time!

DH thinks I'm the weird one and most people would be fine with being filmed 24/7 big brother style. I think he is terrible at empathy and seeing things from the perspective of others, and most people would feel uncomfortable as I do.

To avoid the inevitable LTB pile on, I just want to say I'm 100% certain there's no hidden abusive/nefarious reason why he wants to put cameras up.

So:

YABU - there's nothing wrong with living under 24/7 surveillance in your own home, stop being a weirdo.

YANBU - DH is the weirdo wanting to film every moment of every day on the off chance DS does something funny.

Absolutely not! No cameras in bedrooms or bathrooms.. people have been known to have cameras hacked.
just tell him no more ‘private time’ then

Horrible idea.

That’s a solid NO. Who is going to watch hours/days/years of footage ? Totally obsessive and unhealthy .

DH does have more than necessary though. I figure, if it pleases him, who am I to spoil his fun

Spoil his fun?🤔 It's your house too you know.u

Google must be watching what I read. This just popped up…

Never, ever put a camera inside your home

www.androidcentral.com/accessories/smart-home/never-ever-put-a-camera-inside-your-home

No!!!!
I work with someone who has this. We were at a hotel having breakfast and he was looking at his phone "just seeing if my wife has remembered it's Christmas jumper day for the kids". I found it weird and intrusive, sitting there watching what was going on in the house like it's a reality show. He had the live steam running all breakfast. Send a bloody text if you need to check.

This just gave me shivers! That's very unsettling - I hope at least his wife knew & agreed to it.

She knows the cameras are up and running. The original reason was to be able to remotely check on the pets. It creeped me out too, I think very differently of him.

This is really weird. Is he controlling? Does he think you're up to something?

You wouldn't be able to see any funny things anyway, as it would be too far away to see properly. I've got a camera I use for a baby monitor that I put in the kitchen if I'm out all day to check on the dog but I wouldn't feel comfortable for my partner to watch me like this.

You see this is the point. Some men enjoy checking and supervising their wives. So you get a pet cam.

There are a few criminal cases of controlling men using these cameras. I really think you are not using your head if you think that people spend good money to watch the dog.

It's not the dog. It's YOU

YANBU. Would be an absolute no from me.

I wouldn't agree to that, I find it really weird but I also find these Santa Cam things that parents use to get their DC's to behave really weird too, your house should be the a place you feel comfortable in, not on edge all the time for fear of being filmed

YANBU.

100s of reasons not to......but I would say the No1 reason is hackability....
I have cameras 4 security but looking out at specific points never looking in
Don't do it it's bonkers.

Another thing OP, what about guests? Not sure about you but I find it absolutely bizarre and creepy that by popping over to a friend's house, or my kid going there for a playdate then we'd be under surveillance all the time. In fact, I wouldn't ever come round.

This isn't just unreasonable it's... Odd.

Nobody needed to "check on their pets" remotely from work until they started marketing cameras for this purpose! Most people can't just leave work and go home if their dog gets into the biscuit drawer anyway!