Cancelling our attendance to party because money is tight

[TheQueenOfHearts]

I feel a bit bad as I convinced my husband we should cancel our plans to attend a friend's dinner party tomorrow night.
We found out yesterday it was in an expensive restaurant with a set menu of £70 pp (no booze included), and would also have to pay a babysitter so about £60 on top.
DH was made redundant a few weeks ago and in spite of us having some money to get us going for a few months, I don't think it's reasonable to spend so much for a dinner right now...
AIBU? Should we have gone anyway?

YANBU, YADNBU.
You have to get (keep) your priorities right.

If you say you had only a days notice of the venue and financial costs I think your friends should reimburse you for your childcare arrangements!

I really don’t get this habit of inviting people to special occasions which puts the full cost on the guest! And furthermore it being expensive. Definitely sit it out and no fault of yours!

I had a special birthday in a low cost restaurant and put in for all the drink and a percentage of the food bill. I’m the host deciding where I want to have my Do so I don’t see why I should lay that decision on my friends. Especially when they feel need to give you gifts as well.

This. Where did this idea of choosing a swanky place which friends are expected to pay for come from? It’s bad manners. Especially given the host expects gifts as well .

@sue20 i totally agree. I’d never make these kind of assumptions- who would want to risk making friends feel uncomfortable like this?

Of course your're not being unreasonable. Incredibly stupid of anybody to think otherwise. It's just a fucking dinner for fuck sake. People need to get a grip.

If they are real friends they will understand and get over it. If they are not real friends then you're better off without them anyway. People have to adapt to reality.