You say you don’t live with your partner and father of your baby because you’re independent. The truth is, he scrounges off his mother and lives in her house, stays at the ‘friend’s’ house in her bed, she stays at his (mother’s) in the ‘spare room’ and is a general all around loser.
Of course you don’t want to live in his mother’s house and plus, he’s doesn’t want you to. And plus again, he does not intend on buying his own home, making his own way, caring for a wife or partner and children, being a responsible and stable adult. There’s no shared home for you and your child to live in. He is apparently a terrible father. So you’re independent partly because you’ve never chosen a decent person to have a relationship with, so there’s no opportunity to be ‘dependent’, no choice.
Again, I do not understand these threads. Where is your self respect? You should not let a loser like him anywhere you. I mean, you understand that, right? Your standards need to come way, way up. I mean, into the stratosphere compared to where your boundaries are now.
Drop him and move on. What that means, is to stop obsessing and living via his stupid antics. You are very dependent on him, that’s the reality. So stop. Then, get yourself and your life in gear and begin dating decent, kind, stable, responsible, well mannered, even tempered, men. You know, what we call gentlemen.
Isn’t that what you’d like for the years and decades to come (if you’re interested in relationships) or do you want to keep on hanging off losers forever and be deeply unhappy? It’s up to you.