@MillicentMold you are being so ridiculously illogical I have to wonder if you are unconsciously projecting about some situation from your own life, because this unwarranted, persistent attack on OP isn't very ... balanced.
Neither you or your DP come across as doing all you can to forge a positive relationship between your dc and their GM.
So?
GM isn't very nice. Why would OP want to foist her on their DC?
If GM gave a shit about forging HER OWN positive relationship with her GC, she might have made an effort to do so. She's had a few years to do just that, but hasn't bothered.
It makes no difference to me, whatsoever, whether your dc have a relationship with their GM. I couldn’t care less tbh. You and their DF have parental responsibility.
But you clearly care a great deal, as you can't stop banging on about it.
Your dc will be the ones to judge their upbringing.
😂
Don't worry, they won't need to - you've done that for them.
All based on spurious assumptions & a few complete inventions, but I'm sure OP will be happy to whip this thread out when they turn 18, so they can get their gavels out & denounce her.
Your posts seem to be all about what your MIL does wrong. Now she hasn’t face timed her GC. Have you or DH face timed her for your dc to speak to her?
You haven't RTFT, have you?
MiL doesn't encourage contact.
It's not just us, SIL sees her maybe once a year for lunch. None of her actual children have a close relationship with her.
& on DH -
so if a grown man wants to be LC with his mother it's the wife's fault? Not the fault of the mother who has mistreated him in the past and who generally makes very little effort with her adult DC?
MIL wanted to visit her GC over Christmas. You told her the trains were cancelled so she wouldn’t be able to return home.
Again - RTFT.
Also - the trans aren't necessarily cancelled, many of them are fully booked. Which you'd know if you'd bothered to comprehend OP's actual position, instead of inventing crimes you think she's committed.
MIL messaged me and asked if she could visit us at the end of January, which is totally fine. She doesn't actually celebrate Christmas, we have spent a couple of Christmases with her where we have organised everything, but if someone didn't organise things for her she might just go to work (hospitality) or plan something with other family and friends.
Your DH didn’t want to spend the time to take her home because he doesn’t want to travel that far
or was it because you couldn’t fit everyone in the car? 🧐
Or is it because he’s working?
OP's already answered these Q's, but why do you think it's her responsibility to organise her DH? She's not his keeper. He doesn't answer to her, & OP doesn't answer to you.
That little interrogation is worryingly ... obsessive.
Are you getting grief from your own DiL by any chance? If so - I am really sorry & hope you will be able to resolve your issue with that or whatever it is that's actually bugging you here. But carping at the OP in your weird accusatory style isn't going to fix your problems or make you feel any happier.
Nobody is saying you have to relish hosting MIL but stop making excuses and at least have the guts to let her know where she stands.
She did. Days ago. RTFT.
Also - no excuses, Only facts. Try RTFT?
From your posts it appears MIL is the only one making any effort here.
No it's not. She's not bothered. You are making a drama where none exists.
MiL doesn't give a hoot about xmas. Why are you so invested in her?
btw the only one who HAS made any effort here is OP - who has tried to make the xmas visit happen, has been thwarted by train availability & the refusal of her DH to do a single thing about communicating with his mother, let alone facilitating her travel, & she's now arranged for MiL to visit in January.
Allow her the opportunity to walk away from people who couldn’t give a crap about her
She's not OP's mother - she's DH's. It's not up to OP to dictate what relationship he wants with his mother. He is Low Contact - that's his choice, & it's not down to OP to persuade him otherwise. I really can't see what you're scolding her for - she's not 'guilty' of any of your trumped up charges.