I’m childfree; never wanted kids.
I wholly agree with parents that I won’t probably ever experience a love like what a parent feels for their child, but as I have never experienced that then I don’t feel I’m missing out. It’s a bit like someone never knowing what it’s like to be rich, whereas if you had been rich and then became average wage you would definitely know what you were missing out on.
I see my friend struggling with her son who is now 4, still doesn’t sleep through the night and is possible neurodiverse - she has dark rings round her eyes and she looks permanently knackered and stressed - I honestly cannot think of a worse situation, for myself that is, because I hate stress, worry, noise and having no freedom. But I envy the relationship she has with her 18-year-old daughter because she’s like a best mate and in making the choice I’ve made not to have kids I will never experience that. But that’s the price I have to pay. I thought very long and hard about my decision and the pluses of being a parent just didn’t outweigh the negatives, in my eyes and with knowing my personality/dislikes etc.
I think possibly non-parents can be less selfish as we have more time and resources to give to others than the harassed mum with barely any time to breathe. I am able to work part-time (because I’ve had the extra income to save) and for the rest of my time I volunteer for AGE Uk as a befriender. Also out of my siblings who do have children, I’m the one that does the most for my elderly parents and that’s fine because I realise I have more time and energy.
I think it’s strange that anyone would “feel sorry for” someone that is deliberately childfree 🤷♀️I’m pretty sure that they’ve, as did I, put a hell of a lot of thought into how they’d like their life to turn out and didn’t make the decision lightly.