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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Lift for 5 years - AIBU?

921 replies

Pinot4me · 28/11/2022 20:07

I go to a hobby / interest 4 times a year. It’s a 60 mile round trip but it’s worth it. I really enjoy it and have met some lovely people.
We always go for a meal afterwards. I can never drink because I am always driving. 5 years ago somebody from the same village as me joined the group. She isn’t really a friend, more a neighbour that I am friendly with. She drove herself there for the first couple of times and then asked me if I would give her a lift. I naturally assumed that we would lift share but it just never happened.
She has never offered to drive me or contributed towards my fuel costs. So, basically we all go out and she has several drinks with her meal and I can only have one small one and we leave.

I have taken some annual leave next week and I asked her if she would drive as I really fancied having a few drinks for a change. She very reluctantly agreed but it was awkward and I could see she wasn’t keen.
She has messaged me today saying that she can’t imagine going out and not being able to have a few drinks (grim ) and that she had booked a taxi at a cost of £80 return. She then said so, half n half £40 each..

AIBU to be annoyed? I can’t afford £40 and I think she is cheeky to ask given that she has had free lifts for 5 years!

I’ve composed the following response but haven’t sent it yet… I suppose I am sense checking in case I am the one who is being unreasonable.

“ I can confirm that is indeed pretty grim to drive whilst everyone else drinks. It is what I do every time we go. I’m not up for sharing a taxi - I can’t afford it. Don’t worry about it, I will see you there”.

I honestly don’t feel inclined to give her a lift in future but don’t want the hassle of feeling awkward or causing upset.

Thoughts please.

OP posts:
dementor72 · 07/12/2022 12:27

I hope you are on your way.....alone and with the freedom of the road.
Enjoy

purplecorkheart · 07/12/2022 12:33

Have been lurking in the thread op. Hope you are on your way and had no more contact from cf

Thisusernameisfree · 07/12/2022 17:20

Anyone else slightly excited to hear about the CF and what she may do/say?! Stand your grand OP! 👍🏻

Far too invested in this

LookItsMeAgain · 07/12/2022 17:23

Thisusernameisfree · 07/12/2022 17:20

Anyone else slightly excited to hear about the CF and what she may do/say?! Stand your grand OP! 👍🏻

Far too invested in this

I am hoping that the OP managed to get her drive to the location sans CF in the passenger seat. I am also hoping that she is having a wonderful time getting ready and will have an equally brilliant time at the event. Then hopefully the CF will get in a taxi with her tail between her legs while the OP curls up under lovely crisp clean linens over night and wakes up refreshed tomorrow and has an equally lovely drive home.

amonsteronthehill · 07/12/2022 17:34

Can only imagine how the CF will try to wrangle future lifts into the dinner conversation thinking the OP will roll over.

EL8888 · 07/12/2022 17:35

Thisusernameisfree · 07/12/2022 17:20

Anyone else slightly excited to hear about the CF and what she may do/say?! Stand your grand OP! 👍🏻

Far too invested in this

Meee! Can’t wait. Hope she’s having a blast tonight

RogersOrganismicProcess · 07/12/2022 18:13

Dam! I was all excited for the update, thinking that we were on Thursday already!

Iwanttoslowdown · 07/12/2022 20:58

Hey OP - have a great time

SalviaOfficinalis · 07/12/2022 21:47

I’m hoping OP might do a late night update once she’s tucked up in her lovely hotel bed and winding down for the night after a fun evening.

Noodlehen · 07/12/2022 23:03

SalviaOfficinalis · 07/12/2022 21:47

I’m hoping OP might do a late night update once she’s tucked up in her lovely hotel bed and winding down for the night after a fun evening.

Same but I’m also hoping she gets suitably pissed and takes full advantage of not having to drive for once

PixieLaLa · 07/12/2022 23:40

Fully expecting CF to post another sob story message in the group tomorrow that she can’t come tonight because she can’t get a lift (sad faces) I would respond “Why don’t you drive yourself there and only have the one drink like I do every time?” Grin

BlippiIsAnnoying · 08/12/2022 01:11

Make sure you check the boot before you set off just in case OP

Riverlee · 08/12/2022 07:13

Checking in shamelessly for an update.

wheniwasayounger · 08/12/2022 07:19

I can't wait t hear the latest. Fully expecting her to invade your room for the night lol

londonrach · 08/12/2022 07:25

Hope you have a lovely night tonight op....x

ForestLilac · 08/12/2022 07:32

I th

ForestLilac · 08/12/2022 07:34

I think it was last night wasn’t it? So OP should be waking up in her hotel room now.

WAKEY WAKEY OP 😆. We would love to hear all about it!

Zonder · 08/12/2022 07:36

@ForestLilac I thought she said it was Thursday? So tonight.

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 08/12/2022 07:52

OP said she would update when she gats home on Thursday, so we may have to wait till this afternoon!

Jaichangecentfoisdenom · 08/12/2022 07:53

*Or even gets..

Zonder · 08/12/2022 08:06

Oh yes - I was thinking don't expect an update til Thursday.

christmas2022 · 08/12/2022 08:10

I'm really hoping for a very non-update update, like the CF came and went of her own accord and no more was said about the whole thing and they drank and laughed and ate and drank some more.

Emotionalsupportviper · 08/12/2022 09:23

BlippiIsAnnoying · 08/12/2022 01:11

Make sure you check the boot before you set off just in case OP

😂

Emotionalsupportviper · 08/12/2022 09:25

Have to admit that while I love the DRAMA!!!!!, I'm hoping for OP's sake that all just goes smoothly and well, and that where CF goes or not there is no ill-feeling.

I'd hate to think that anyone - OP or other members of the group were made to feel uncomfortable on what should be a lovely night out for them all.

Emotionalsupportviper · 08/12/2022 09:26

Oh - sorry Christmas

I see you've effectively posted the same thing. Apologies.

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