To think 3 days compassionate leave is appalling

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How much do you think people should be given?

It's one day in the company I work for but yes I agree that 3 days is not enough. Lots of people have to get a note from their GP to cover the time off they need.

I think when people are mentioning sick leave they are assuming it's paid sick leave rather than statutory sick leave.

i just wouldnt go in let them give me a warning id take it to a disciplinary if i got sacked over it

She takes sick leave. I got signed off for six weeks sick when my dad was dying, admittedly 3 weeks of this I spent nursing him at home as the hospice was full. He was bed bound and needed 24 hr care. I wasn’t sick but I was certainly stressed. 🤷‍♀️

Exactly. I believe ssp is something like £90 per week which wouldn't even cover electric at this rate!

@MichaelFabricantWig this company does not struggle for money by any means.

Unfortunately sometimes we don't get to pick and choose and get the perfect job with perfect benefits. And of course being early 20s this situation just wasn't expected.
No life insurance and no assets to pass down. No nice car to sell or anything

Sick leave isn't an option, the bills would not be paid, it would hardly cover the cost of electric and food at £90 per week

Why are you so hung up on that one thing? Just stop nit picking over something so irrelevant. Whether she was 16, 36 or 106 the trauma is still the same! Please leave the thread if you have nothing helpful to add

This is why I went into work and cried at my desk and in the toilets.

Yes, it is shit. My parent died recently and I got 5 days paid compassionate leave.

It wasn't enough, but I get that companies can't give unlimited leave.

There's nothing you can do really unfortunately. You either get signed off sick, or go back to work. There aren't really any other options.

My colleague had a week off (paid) when her dog died. It’s acceptable and normal where I live.

Not to sound unsympathetic but compassionate leave isn't there for grieving, it's to give people time to make any arrangements they may need to, organise funerals/childcare etc. If someone is struggling and needs time off to grieve you'd usually be signed off by the GP. Most companies have a set minimum of compassionate or bereavement leave days and any more would usually be up to your manager to approve. In this case I would approve a longer period of leave.

She's unlikely to get sacked but also sounds like employer won't pay her. The issue is (if I understand correctly?) she's looking for paid time off and her company only gives 3 days and doesn't pay sick leave.

Has she got no family that could help her out? Her father, grandparents? If you’re so worried about her financially could you arrange a collection amongst your colleagues. But then will that set a precedent?

Don’t take it personally it seems to be a thing on here to pick up on that. I recall a thread in relationships last Christmas where a woman in her early 20s with a baby had discovered her dp was having an affair at work do with a ‘girl’ - she’d seen a message pop up on shared device. Whole thing got derailed for a while by ‘girl’ - you mean he’s a paedophile type posts. It got back on track and she rang her mum but of all the things to pick up on.

Certain trades or professions may have hardship funds. If that’s applicable maybe search and see if you can point her in that direction- either her profession or her mums.

It’s really not as black and white as this.
Sudden, one day they’re here and the next they’re gone? What about collapse Monday, die Saturday? Where do you draw the line? Long illnesses, how is this any easier to decide on timescales? Anything over a month? Does that mean if they die on day 28 it’s still classed as sudden?
Spouse or child is there any age limit for either? But what if they had a long illness, shouldn’t they be prepared for it? What about the spouse who never got around to divorcing, are they still entitled to as much leave as they like?
Friends are the family you choose, some friends are the family of those without any living relatives
Parent, more or less time if there’s a widow and children compared to an only child of a lone parent?
Some people love pets more than people. Whoever used the ant analogy was about as insensitive as you could get.
There are so many variables which is why an employer has a set time like three days. However generous an employer is, for some it will never be enough and others will abuse it.

How are you related to her op?

It is terrible, and I wasn’t entitled to any compassionate leave when my closest relative had a life changing stroke, their reason? She’s not a child 🙄

Forgot to add I am (and was at the time) her next of kin

Depends on the reason.
When my 62 year old dad died early one Saturday morning, completely out of the blue, when I phoned my boss later that same day to say I wouldn't be in on Monday, he told me I wasn't entitled to ANY leave! I went back to work on the Wednesday, which in hindsight was a mistake. And then I had 3 days for the funeral. And that was because I marched into his office, told him what I was having, and marched out again. And he had the good sense not to argue it. So I had 5 days off in all.

It's called compassionate leave. The clue's in the name.

3 days is nothing - all the funeral arrangements and practical paperwork you have to deal with is horrendous
I am 7 weeks in after DH died and today was still on the phone to the bank for an hour!
Hopefully most people are able to get a sick note to cover time off

MumofSpud

gosh thats sounding like a big problem with the bank, 2 years on those there are still a couple of things to so which I an getting round to